Use me | chansung

🐍Aerosmith🐍

Minho's pov.

I'm sitting on the couch, fidgeting as I wait for them to come back in the room. Back at the store, I had seen that a boy had dropped something but when I handed it to him...I could recognize him by the way he moved, by how he always smells like vanilla, by what candy he had chosen. I had never been more sure of something, so I followed them all the way back here.

He doesn't have a scratch on him, he even seems in better shape then when I last saw him.

They finally come back in the room and the tension is thick, so much you could cut right through it with a knife. I only want what is best for him, for jisung, for the man my heart as longed to be with. I know he doesn't feel the same and I know I'm staying in the same cycle.

"I leave tomorrow." Chan announced to me, which took me by surprise. "I'll take the money and give it all as a donation to the hospital."

"What about you?" I ask and catch Jisung's attention quickly.

"You'll never see me again."

I see Jisung's jaw clench along with his fists that turn into a ball and tense. He's uneasy.

Oh.

He doesn't want him to go.

"So what about tonight?"

"You two can sleep in Jisung's room and I'll sleep in mine, I'll be out of your way by the time the sun rises."

"I assume you want me to say nothing to police or the press...?"

"It would be appreciated, I need to disappear after all"

There it is again, jisung sort of flinches and only looks at the ground.

"You have my word" I speak calmly but my eyes do not leave him. He seems so different now, yet it has only been two weeks. I had told myself it was my fault all this time that he was gone, that I didn't walk with him that night, that I didn't call him.

"Let's go to bed then" chan is the one who speaks again and jisung nods, looking my way. He motions me to follow him and I walk with him up the small and cranky stairs. We go to his room, I suppose, and he gets into bed, letting me have a spot next to him.

I lay close and look at him in the moonlight.

"I am glad you are well jisung."

"I missed you Min" he hugs me as we lay and I smile, after so long. "It was so hard and frustrating at first, here, without a touch or the warmth of a person..."

"I'm proud of you, you haven't done anything in 2 weeks?"

"Yeah I...can't remember the last time I felt so free. It was hard but...it feels good now"

"Did he ever...?"

"No, oh god no" he shakes his head and looks my way, the long pillow we are sharing making it hard to see each other. "He never touched me, never even tried to...anyway, we should get some sleep" he says, saddened.

"Right, we should" I've just realized that he has done nothing to sleep with me, he didn't look at me like he used to. He uses people, that's what he was good at. He would usually take one good look at me and I'd say yes to all his requests. But now, he hasn't done anything.

He just laid peacefully in bed and watched the stars in the window. I bet it didn't even cross his mind to sleep with me, he's too busy in his own mind.

You have changed...Han Jisung.

<3

Chan's pov.

It's late, it's really late.

I transferred my little sister to a hospital where she can finally get the surgery. I accepted the police negotiations, they will find him by the afternoon, where I will be already gone. The money will be sent as a donation to my sister and nobody will ever be hurt again.

I open the door to my room, I took all the important things I need, anything that could lead back to me. I know Jisung won't tell them a thing, he'll lie and probably convince everyone.

My things are in the car, all that's left is to leave a note for him, for the man I told myself I would never get close to.

I go back inside the small house and lay the note I hand wrote on the counter.

I was about to leave when I hear the note being opened.

"All you were going to leave me was a letter?" Jisung stares at me and rips the letter in half, throwing it in the trash.

"Jisung...don't make this harder then it needs to be.

"I want to know you felt the same."

"I need to go."

"Tell me. Because I'm not afraid to say it Chan, I've grown fond of you and I'm poisoned to watch you leave..."

"I..."

"Say it."

"I cant."

"Then show me."

I take him by the coat and crash our lips together, grabbing his waist in the process. He returns the kiss and we both know this will be our last, that's it. 

"I...I'm an idiot to have fallen for you, Jisung." I say, out of breath.

"I love you" the words escaped his mouth before he could even catch them. It might have been because I was tired, or maybe it was because I felt the same, but I felt every word.

I kiss him again and he grabs my hair.

"I love you too. God I do"

You might be thinking that it hasn't been long enough to call it love, or maybe you think I'm impulsive.

I don't care.

He pulls away and looks into my eyes and I feel the cold breeze of the night hit my back. I have to go, right now, yet he's holding me.

"You need to leave...don't you...?"

"Yes..."

"Will I ever see you again...?"

I want to, I'd do anything to be able to look into his eyes every night, how stunning they are.

"Not now..."

"Later then?"

"I cannot provide the answers you want me to give you."

"Then promise me this...come back one day...just one, and give me a sign. A sign that you are well and that you've come to see me."

"Will you wait for me...?"

"I would wait a thousand years for you."

I smile and embrasse him into another kiss, taking in his vanilla scent and his soft skin.

"I will miss you"

"I will wait...now go"

I take a last look at him and I am out the door the next second.