Chapter Twelve

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Human was a word meant for people that had the distinct feature that seperated them from the animal kingdom, where they had flesh that wasn't entirely covered in fur.

Where they could talk and make conversation and have emotions that were all over the place.

A human was what I wanted and what Luke wanted to be, what he felt like when he was with me.
He looked human that I was certain about, he acted like a human, and talked like one. He had emotions and his own thoughts.

I guess in ways he was human, and maybe it was that I was getting desperate and I needed someone and he was there but I think I was starting to open myself up to him. Like I never had to anyone else. It might be that he was there and I needed something like that, from another person beside my dad who was gone most of the time.

Desperation might have gotten to me that was a good possibility or it could have been this pull I felt towards him.

One that was deeper than the scars that littered my body, deeper than the empty barren numbness I felt or the feelings that had been locked up inside of me for so long.

Luke was now quiet but his usual mechanical breathing was heard, he wasn't sleeping that was for sure since robots don't sleep.

He was probably taking me into consideration and letting me get to sleep.

After he had said those six words I stayed quiet trying to decide on what I should do next. Words came and went and I was out of ideas.

His arm was still wrapped around me but I loved it even pulled myself deeper into his grasp although I knew it was a bad idea.

A robot and human laying down together, oh the irony in that. I don't know why but I was beginning to have a change in heart about the boy. I wouldn't say I liked him but I didn't hate him.

His arms around me were calming in its own way. The way I seemed to melt in his touch and felt safe made me smile. It was dangerous I was aware of that, dangerous to become emotionally attached to someone or something like him.

I would get to think of it more later today when dad takes Luke with him to check his hard drive and everything else I would be able to think in the privacy of my house. Decide if I should drag the envitable on any longer then I already seemed to be.

His mood swings wouldn't help anything though, he was a threat and he could still harm me more than he might have. Though he helped me when he had caught me in the act of cutting. He might not be perfect entirely but dad was right he was perfect for me because he was like the vision boyfriend and I needed someone like him in my life.

I wanted to find out who Luke was, who was the boy that he looked like, who the lady scientist at his work thought he was. See if the real boy was anything like this Luke I had come to know. If it turns out that this boy is absolutely like Lucas than I would give anything to have him, have someone that was like this boy who I had known for only a short time.

It scared me how badly I wanted -no needed- someone like him so entirely. I knew I would never be able to have a family or grow old with Luke so I needed someone.
Look at me already talking about commitment and families and I'm not even sixteen yet.

I had a long time ahead of me and I knew that this Luke had a few extra years on him so if I kept this one around for a few years there wouldn't be anything wrong with it, but the thought that I might fall deeply in love with him was a good possibility.
Keeping him around wasn't the best idea in the world, falling in love, and commitment wasn't something I should be thinking about but it seemed like that was what Luke was looking for with me.

I might have to try to dig out the facts about who the boy might be from Luke and my dad, maybe I might get a good enough idea, and if I need to I could always sneak down to the science facility and find out more from LH, dads assistant.

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