Maybe

Chapter 37 End Yet

Thut thut thut

"Nina? " Are you still not done? Open the door Honey"

The water falling sound wasn’t  stopping and she got worried and worried."Nina" and desperate.

"Ni-"

The door swings open revealing  Nina. "Oh God i thought -"

"Mom can you Please leave me alone for a while. I want to sleep.

" oh okay"

_Nina_

I open my eyes It's not end yet.i lose much blood but i failed to cut my veins properly. Iam sick of it ugh.i try to get up but almost lose balance. I lose Pretty much blood.i somehow managed to get up.Looking at the tub i recognised it was wholely red and bloody. It's my blood. It's my wrist's blood.

I take a fresh bath and also dressup my hand.i put my clothes on and step Out. Mom, she was already knocking at my door i wasn’t replying.I told her to leave i want to rest.Hopefully she Didn't notice my hand.

"Iam going somewhere please Don't do anything stupid" she said pleading.

"If you want to go just go.Iam old enough to look after me." i said rudely.

I lied because i wanted to do something stupid..

"I know " the Only thing i got in return. "Goodnight " she said left.

I sighed closing the door but i Didn't lock it.i look at my hand the bandage fitted perfectly but it took a while to dress and stop the blood. Thank God I Know how to dress wounds..

I wish i Didn't.

Due to alot blood loss i feel weak and dizzy.Drinking water might Help. I got out of my room to get some water. As far i know i would be home Alone.
           I pour water in a glass but my hand was weak enough to even hold it properly. I successfully drank water without getting hurt.but only water Didn't work but i Don't care I felt sleepy maybe it was because Iam getting weaker and weaker.

As i was walking past the living room i felt i saw someone.

Ghost?

I glance again and shiver ran through my whole body.. What's he DOING HERE? I couldn’t care less.He was leaning forward on the croucher looking at the laptop kept on the table front of him.he was busy on it doing something urgent.

I Don't want to know what is he doing here or why is he here or Anything.

I Didn't want him to notice me so I thought of walking past ignoring him.just as i started walking, "Was it successful? " and I stop.i Don't want to know what's exactly he was talking about. Let's just ignore?

"I guess not because you are still walking around and Iam pretty sure It's not your ghost" Now i know.The person who knocked first was Him. He might have heard the noise when i took out the blade. "What a foolish"

His voice was cold, so colder Than even the Ice itself.

Fuck you

I ignore him and walk inside my room.I locked my door and loocked at my hand.it was kind if red. I Didn't know which place is the best or maybe i Didn't want to cut the best place. It wasn’t a thin cut i cut it tragically taking all anger Out on my hand thus it came out like this.

I go sit on my bed and the feelings hits.i was already feeling numb but he brought the worst out of me. Why is it foolish? Wouldn’t it be better if I was dead off?

Fuck me

Should i try it again?

Fuck it.

I lay on the bed and close my eyes. I open it Again, I close it again, i open it again.this time it was blurry,i close it again and..

Open it Again. The sun hits me right into my face.It's morning already by now. Night passed so fast.i got up and sit but i feel Heavy my left hand.i look at it and saw some tubes are connected to my hand.i feel strangely better than the last Night. I look around and see no one and I'm in a Hospital.

Then a few moments later i see mom. "How do you feel dear?" her voice sounds sweeter than the suger and i weirdly hate it.now That i tried to kill myself she comes to me with all her love.

           I Don't response instead i stare at my wrist. "It's been four days, Thanks to him orelse" her words are faint as if she Doesn't want to continue properly. And she even Thanks him. Who is Him. Him is no one. She Didn't get angry and curse at me for doing it.She would've slapped me three times in my face for doing this stupid shit but surprising fact,She Didn't.. She changed. Or she is guilty?

"Mom please leave me alone" iam still not in the mood to see Anyone. I want to be alone for a while. "But-"

"Please! Iam Fine" I look at her and i hoped she saw my teary eyes.She looked down at her feet than walked Out but she Didn't close the door.

Iam not Fine. I was never fine.i was just worthless and a Burden to all.

Tears started falling from my cheeks. I Don't want to live like that anymore this brings nothing but increases the Burden. I hear footsteps and i whipe my tears away because i know exactly who is it. I look away at the window not wanting to face him.Of course he was forced to do that if He wasn’t There.

           "Did it do any better? Were you making sure if your blood is red or blue?" He said. I Don't want to respond so i kept Quite. "Elizabeth Nina " his voice reminded me of his Teenage voice which i once loved alot.he Somehow managed to sound like that but in a deep voice. I guess poverty changes everything too. I Couldn't see anything rather than the sunlight so i close my eyes to see but i see still nothing this is what I'm.another tear falls down my right cheek.

Iam a light that if you stare longer You'll go blind but if you close your eyes,you see darkness. Both extra darkness and extra light gives pain. Iam pain...

"You gave up so easily Ely" I suddenly see the old Ethan and I Open my eyes.He was doing something to me.He was bringing my hopes up which went down when i met him that Night. No i Won't let it happen.

"Leave.. Leave me alone Chris" now that feels different.Saying Chris brings the younger Ethan in my vision.he have already created many Version Of Ethan in my vision.

But the fact is It's not End Yet is tearing every single pieces of my heart.