A Court of Shadows and Lies / ACOTAR FF

Chapter 37

I was sat on the bay window in the middle of the day, finally wrapped up in a jumper. The Autumn weather had finally given way to nippier part of the season, but the coolness came on the day we were going for a picnic at night. Who even did picnics at night? I sure as hell had never had a picnic in the middle of the night, and apparently Cassian was adamant that he wanted it then as well.

It was so weird but I was still going, Azriel was making sure of it.

He had dragged me out of his bed after I had just slept in it, needing the company of anyone else but my own empty thoughts; a habit I knew I needed to kill. They weren't saying anything degrading to myself, it was just an odd silence with the realisation hitting me two days ago.

My mother could come and get me, she must have known where I was, but she made the decision to leave me here. She abandoned me. Her own daughter. My sisters probably didn't even know, judging from Cel's reaction when we had met in our dreams while I was on the continent. What a fucking bitch.

Then it was the realisation she had let me be tortured. Her own daughter, her flesh and blood, in agony.

I must have looked like I was lost in my thoughts as Azriel came over, dressed in a pair of grey soft trousers and a white long-sleeved cotton shirt, the four lone buttons at the top undone showcasing his black swirls. His shadows were relaxed around him today, and had been so since we had come home from our shopping trip. He hadn't mentioned the odd fae but had alluded to it when he disappeared the day before.

"Do you want to help me cook?" he asked.

"I don't really cook," I admitted, closing the book in my hand. "I've always had cooks who would do it for me."

"Is that what I am?" he asked me, a grin planted on his face. "A cook?"

"Yeah," I replied. He could also eat me out.

Azriel must have had the same idea, his grin widening into a smirk. Holding out his hand, I pushed the book off my lap and onto the seat, and grabbed it. He gently pulled me off the bay window and led me to the kitchen where a variety of ingredients, pots, pans and cooking utensils were neatly arranged. I quietly hopping onto the chair on the island while Azriel walked around it, stopping directly opposite me.

He slid across a chopping board, a knife and an array of vegetables. I stared at the assortment before raising an eyebrow at him. "Are you serious?"

"Yes," he replied, picking up a slab of pork chops. I watched as he began to season it with salt and pepper.

"This isn't very picnic-like," I commented, grabbing an onion and peeling the skin off it. "Who brings pork chops to a picnic?"

"What would you bring to one?" he asked, flipping the chop over and massaging the meat with salt.

"Cake," I replied. "Sandwiches."

"That's a bit mundane," Azriel commented, sliding the pork chop he was working on to an empty plate.

"In my defence, I normally showed up and ate." I balanced the onion on the chopping board and lifted the knife before Azriel reached over and gripped my right wrist, stopping me.

"You're going to make the both of us cry if you cut it the way I think you are," Azriel commented. I pouted at him.

"Then you do it."

"I'll show you how to do one."

"I'd rather you did all of them," I muttered, watching Azriel release my wrist and wash his hands, leaving me restless for his touch. Gods, any new feelings I felt with Azriel I hadn't felt in a long time, and they always seemed to make me feel edgy.