good old fashioned lover boy (Eddie Munson X Reader)

five)

A part of me wanted Dan and Axel to come by.

I don't know why.

It's their fault I'm like this but...

I don't know.

I didn't cry.

I couldn't.

I know I did after initially finding out but from here I was just kind of numb.

I just led in bed.

Just led there.

The most I did was grab my walkman to listen to sad music in order to make me even sadder.

There's just nothing here anymore.

What could I do??

I just wasted 3 years of my life on someone I thought loved me.

I had planned our future together.

We were gonna move out of this shitty town.

We were gonna get married.

Tour the world with the band until we couldn't anymore.

Then we'd just settle down and have kids and..

Live a happy life together.

Everything.

Now what am I gonna do??

I have no plans.

My future is fucked.

My relationship is fucked.

My head is fucked.

Everything is fucked.

"Y/N?" I heard Dustin call out from behind my door.

I didn't respond.

"someone left a tape for you" now this caught my attention.

"who?" I replied.

"I don't know. It was left in the postbox.. and it's.. Its wrapped so I can't tell. I.. I don't feel right opening it for you" he stated.

I paused for a moment.

"come in" I mumbled.

The door opened with the speed of light as my little brother appeared in the doorway.

"give it here" I stated.

He stumbled towards me and carefully placed the tape in my hands.

"what happened??" he asked. "we talked to Eddie cause.. apparently you told him but he wouldn't tell us. said it wouldn't be right"

I paused for a moment.

He didn't tell them??

I took a moment before grabbing the back of Dustin's head, kissing his forehead softly.

"I love you. now go please" I moved my attention to the tape in my hand.

"I love you too, sis" he nodded before exiting the room.

I furrowed my eyebrows at the wrapping paper in front of me.

It was blue and had snowmen on it..

It's May...

That's cute.

I ripped open the paper and stumbled to read what the song was.

David Bowie - Rock N Roll Suicide

I don't know this one.

I love Bowie.

I turned the tape over.

don't know if you know this one but I know you like Bowie and it just fits.
You're not alone, Wilson.

I could help by smile to myself.

A small smile that is.. but a smile nonetheless.

That's weirdly sweet of him.

I grabbed my Walkman and placed the tape inside.

I excitedly placed the headphones over my ears and pressed play.

I played the song on repeat for almost an hour, crying more and more with each word.

Crying for the first time since it happened.

Oh no, love, you're not alone
No matter what or who you've been
No matter when or where you've seen
All the knives seem to lacerate your brain
I've had my share, I'll help you with the pain
You're not alone