BTAP - CHAPTER 24

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CHAPTER 24: CONFESSION

Scarianna Eleanor's POV

"Anderson."

My body suddenly stiffened and I felt like I was out of breath for a moment when I heard that deep and serious voice.

Shet, ito na ba ang katapusan ko lord?

"Anderson, I'm calling you, are you deaf?" Iritableng tanong ni ma'am. Nakatalikod pa rin kasi ako sa kaniya. Natatakot kasi akong humarap, kainis.

"M-Ma'am..." Utal-utal na bulalas ko. Dahan-dahan akong humarap sa kaniya. When I saw her, I could clearly see her dark aura, and the emotionless looks she bestowed on me.

"B-Bakit po?"

"Let's talk, follow me." Malamig na sabi niya at agad akong tinalikuran.

Nanginginig ang kalamnan kong sinundan siya, kabado singkwenta na ako ngayon because I know we will talk about the indecency I said and did earlier when we performed.

We stopped in an uncrowded place, it's quiet here and peaceful. Tinignan ko rin ang kabuuan ni ma'am baka kasi may dala siyang kutsilyo or baril tapos bigla nalang akong saksakin or headbang-in dito. Shems, ayoko pa pong mamatay.

What if ma-head-shot ako 'di ba? 

Tanging hangin lang ang maririnig sa paligid at tunog ng paghinga ko. Ang sarap magpalamon sa lupa ngayon.

Wala pa rin siyang emosyon na nakatingin sa'kin. Pilit kong nilalabanan ito kahit hirap na hirap na akong huminga ngayon.

"Are you serious about what you have said earlier?" Seryosong tanong niya. Nanigas ako bigla dahil sa diretsyahang ranong niya. But, I guess, I need to answer this and she really need my answer.

Pasimpleng huminga muna ako ng malalim bago sumagot, "Yes..." Sagot ko, pilit kinakalma ang sarili. "I-I'd never felt this way. This freaking weird feeling, e-especially to a woman. My heart begins to beat faster whenever I see you—as if... I were in a race. Also, I've experienced the so-called "butterfly in the stomach" a lot of times, whenever y-you're closer to me. Cringe man pakinggan, pero totoo. Hindi ko rin alam na mangyayari 'to. Sobrang laki ng impact mo sa pagkatao ko. I'm well aware and know to myself that I am a straight woman. However, because of you, I recently noticed that I am no longer that one, I mean, nababaliko na ako dahil I started to like someone—a woman, and that someone is you." I confessed, sincerely looking into her eyes. Alam kong naluluha na ang mata ko dahil sa kaba, pero hinayaan ko lang. Ang mahalaga, nasasabi ko na ang nararamdaman ko. Nag-iinit na rin ang buong katawan ko.

"God, you're crazy," napahilamos siya sa mukha matapos marinig ang mga sinabi ko.

"I know, but-" I mean, alam ko naman sa sarili ko na nababaliw na ako. Alam ko namang mali 'to pero, hindi ko kaya, hindi ko kayang itago 'to.

Nakita ko ang matinik na pagtingin nya sa mga mata ko bago siya muling nagsalita.

"You should stop that bullshits, Anderson. You know that we're both women and one more thing, I am your teacher and you are my student." Seryoso at may diing sabi niya.

"I'm aware of that, ma'am. But, a person's feelings ay hindi naman nac-control, nang magustuhan nga kita ay hindi ko naman pinilit, I never forced myself to like you and I don't want to force myself to lose my feelings towards you, pinag-isipan ko 'to nang matagal at mabuti bago sabihin sa'yo, kaya no'ng time na sinabi ko sa'yong gusto kita ay na-confirmed ko na, na totoo 'tong nararamdaman ko para sayo. I know you don't like me, because I think you're straigh-" she cut me off.

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