Chapter 36

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I shifted on the bed slightly until my eyes completely opened to find Malfoy sitting on the bed, with two pieces of parchments on his hands.

I heaved a yawn and lifted my head slightly from the pillow to get a better look of the parchments. I immediately knew they were about our research on the Horcrux.

“What are you doing?” I asked.

Malfoy swirled his head to me, caught off guard by my voice and distracting him from his thoughts. “I didn’t mean to wake you.” He said in an apologetic tone.

I raised an eyebrow. “I can tell.” I said firmly. “You definitely wouldn’t want me to see you working already so early on the parchments.”

He sighed and placed the parchments on his bedside table and stood up from the bed. His features suddenly went dark and filled with sorrow.

“Did you even sleep the whole night?” I inquired scoldingly, he knew how I hated this Horcrux subject and how I even hated more when he deprived himself of sleep because of it.

“I did.” He assured me. “I awoke like an hour ago or so.”

“And you couldn’t find anything else to do?” I inquired.

He sighed and sat down on the left side of the bed, my side, right near my body and let his head fall to his hands helplessly.

I sighed and sat up on the bed. I closed in the few inches separating us and hugged him from behind, with nothing but the sheets wrapped around my upper body preventing our skin from touching. Slowly I rubbed small circles with my hands on his back and switched between roaming his skin up and down.

“This has to do with your aunt, doesn’t it?” I asked, though I knew it was true, I knew him enough to be sure of it.

He nodded. “The faster we do this, the faster we destroy You-Know-Who, the faster the war in France ends and she can come home safely.” He explained.

I let my head fall to his shoulder, to get a bit of a sight of his face, his eyes were covered by his hands and I could tell of how helpless he felt at this moment.

“I know. I understand. But we need to do this together. And we also need to know when to take breaks.” I said in a poor try to get him some sense. “I may not know your aunt that well but I know she wouldn’t want you to overwhelm yourself with a decision she made.” I stated.

“I’m worried about her.” Malfoy admitted.

I placed a kiss on his shoulder in order to try to ease his tensed muscles and nerves. “It’s normal that you are worried. But you also need to calm down, you won’t be able to think logically if you are in the need of sleep.” I admitted apologetically.

Malfoy lifted his head from his hands and glanced at me. He brought his hand to the top of mine that was on his shoulder and slowly lowered his head in direction to mine, and kissed me softly on the lips.

He brought his head back just a little. “You’re the person I trust most in the whole world.” He stated softly.

That sentence might as well have shattered my heart, because I felt as if someone was clenching it hard for everything I was doing, every deceiving, every lie. Malfoy’s words broke me, not because I didn’t want him to trust me, I did, but I knew he shouldn’t.

“…And so, I know I could trust you to put me in bed if I fall asleep in the floor during the day.” Malfoy finished.

I gave him a smile, masquerading the guilt I felt deep inside me.

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