After Death (Completed)

匚卄卂卩ㄒ乇尺 １９(Still good somewhere)

匚卄卂卩ㄒ乇尺　１９：　丂ㄒ丨ㄥㄥ　Ꮆㄖㄖᗪ　丂ㄖ爪乇山卄乇尺乇

乇ㄒ卄卂几　山卂尺尺乇几

乇丂ㄒ丨爪卂ㄒ乇ᗪ，　丂乇卩ㄒ乇爪乃乇尺　２０２５

卂乃ㄖㄩㄒ　４０　爪ㄖ几ㄒ卄丂　卂千ㄒ乇尺　ㄖㄩㄒ乃尺乇卂Ҝ

匚卂ㄥ丨千ㄖ尺几丨卂，　卄ㄖ爪乇

丂乇卂丂ㄖ几　４

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We moved on, we started again as difficult as it was. We planted crops, purified water, and got working electricity. We made this place our home. 

Leah gave birth to her and Dallen's son, she named him Amyas after her sister. She didn't let anyone see him except Rudi who offered to look after him from time to time. I didn't dare to ask to see him, I knew she wanted me to have nothing to do with it all. I heard him cry through the thin walls, it broke my heart knowing that his life will never be what it should. 

We honor those we've lost through a memorial, it wasn't much but it helped us all. Seeing their names carved into the side of the biggest building made it all seem just a little bit better. 

It would take time for all of us to forget enough to be happy but this was a start at least. 

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尺ㄩᗪㄖㄥ卩卄　卂ㄥ丨几丂Ҝㄚ

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I didn't mind what this place had come to be, I hated how it got here, but the aftermath truly wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. The new faces were nice but I missed the old ones, they made places like this feel like home. It was becoming something but I couldn't let myself get my hopes up. 

Airianna stayed at Evelyn and Khai's house for the most part. She had to be able to keep an eye on her considering her drowsiness and migraines. I wished she could come on walks with Juna and I, the world finally felt quiet and the air didn't feel painful to breathe. The war was over, and I don't think I'd be able to handle another one if Ethan had started it. I want to just have everything feel like how it did back at the apartment, back when there wasn't chaos and everything seemed simpler. It's just not the same anymore. 

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ㄥ乇卂卄　丂ㄖㄩ丨乂乇尺

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I feel like it's my own fault that I wasn't the one to kill Timothy. I knew what was about to happen when I saw Ethan being held captive, I had every chance to but I didn't, Ethan did. I keep telling myself that he should have kept him alive long enough for me to get there but he saw the opportunity, he did what a "leader" should do.  I had every opportunity to get my ass over to him and I ran, I can only blame myself. But I also can't because then I wouldn't be able to sleep at night. 

I see Dallen in my son's eyes. They remind me of how little I even knew about him and how I don't even think I was in love. I cared about him but it wasn't how it should be, I don't think I can ever love someone, maybe not even my own kid. 

I went to Timothy's grave and dug up his corpse. I lit a fire and watched his lifeless body burn. He didn't deserve an honorable death, I didn't even care what his people would think. Ethan must have seen the smoke because he came to join me. Instantly, I had thoughts of pushing him into the flames but that would just be stupid in the long run. 

"I probably would have done the same thing if I wasn't there when he died," Ethan turned to face me but I continued to stare at the wood burning. "I saw a different side to him that day. I know no one will ever be able to forgive him, especially you." I turned to him now, I saw the tears forming in his eyes and I held back my own as I thought about Dallen and Amyas. "At least he's not gonna do anything else." 

My face heated up and my eyes began to water. I don't like to cry in front of people, I don't like to cry in general but I couldn't stop myself. 

"I wanted him to suffer. I wanted him to hurt as much as I am. I wanted his death to be slow, more than just a bullet to the head." 

"It couldn't have been that way, Leah, we can't do things that way." 

"We can though, people deserve it, people like him all deserve it." 

"What happened to all that talk about hating me for killing Calvin? For "causing the death of Amy?" You believed that not all people are bad, don't let a war take that away from you, it's not true."

He was wrong though, no one out here is good. Strangers kill strangers, friends get revenge, people die. And a hell of a lot of people seem to die whenever Ethan sticks his neck out. 

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End of Season 4