Hey guys! It's Kween, back at it again...kind of. I last updated this story in 2018, and I know people were hoping for updates. Honestly, I was, too. I hate leaving something unfinished, and this is truly one of my proudest works. I like seeing how I've progressed as a writer and I'm pleased with the composition of this fanfic. Ilsa is still a huge part of me, and she's a character I loved exploring. It's been amazing seeing how many people enjoyed it and all the positive (and even negative) feedback has been so awesome.
With that being said, there are parts of this book that I am not proud of. First off, there is a lot of mention of suicide that is not incredibly tactful. I'll be adding trigger warnings to the story description. I know familial abuse can also be triggering so I'll try to add warnings for that content as well. I apologize to anyone I may have distressed or caused emotional pain. I haven't heard from anyone directly about this issue but it was really important that I apologize to anyone who I may have hurt without knowing.
Secondly: holy shit, I should not have put Ilsa in a relationship with Levi. Reading back those chapters now, I cringe because I remember how little I understood about romantic relationships and the abuse that can happen within power imbalances and age gaps. I'm an adult woman now, no longer a high schooler fantasizing about a character almost double her age. I've lived more life since writing this book, and I can see how potentially toxic Levi's romance with Ilsa could become. I'm also very aware of the damage that can be done by glamorizing such a relationship through fanfiction. So disclaimer: I do not condone relationships with massive age gaps or with workplace superiors. Tbh: If I were writing this now, I would have put Ilsa and Jean together; they're honestly best friends->lovers goals!
Attack on Titan will always hold an incredibly special place in my heart. I'm currently rewatching it so that I can binge the final season! The nostalgia is overwhelming, guys. I have so many good memories of writing this fic, and trust me, your comments and friendships mean so much. It's also my belief that this fic helped me become a better writer, and it was a wonderful exercise in exploring characters and different perspectives. However, after almost four years with no inspiration, it's time for me to put this story to rest.
Please keep reading and writing. If you take anything away from Ilsa's story let it be this: Enjoy the things you love, tell your family you love them, and remember that you are not alone in this world. You are worth it. And also, let's fight for the world we live in now, to make it better for the people who come after us.
Much Love~
Kween
P.S.-I mentioned that I got a boyfriend in the notes after Chapter 45...to quote from Jane Eyre:
"Reader, I married him."
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Mask-An Attack on Titan Fan Fiction
FanfictionThe one thing Ilsa wanted was to escape. She wanted freedom from her current oppression, and that was what she got. The military accepted her, and she trained hard, trying to throw away her dark past while disguised as a boy. Then, tragedy had to...
