For Her Undamaged (GirlxGirl)

60. Deal's Off

Questions spun around rapidly in my mind I couldn't keep up, I was too tired to keep trying. "It'll be sorted out, you don't have to worry about anything." She mumbles and I nod, she can read me with such ease, and yet I can't. I haven't been able to read her the way she reads me she just knows things about me that I haven't given a care in the world to tell.

'What about you?' I want to ask, 'What about you, Skylar?' I didn't care about what happened with the man, I just want to know what's she's hiding. What secret she hasn't told me and why she's hiding it.

She pulled up to my house and I opened the car door. We didn't look at each other but I want to, I couldn't bring myself to see her in a state like that, with red knuckles and a bruised face, I couldn't take it anymore.

"I think we're done Skylar." I sniffle and swallow hard stepping out of the car but then I feel her warm hold my arm but I immediately pull my arm away as if she was dirty, someone I didn't know. Someone I didn't know.

"What?" She asks again leaning as far as possible, I don't want to say it again but I can't bear to continue seeing her when I saw what she's capable of.

"We're done, what do you want me to say, Skylar? We're done, I mean it's not like we were actually officially together. And our deal has been done for ages. I don't want to see you anymore. I can't, I just can't." I found the courage to make eye contact with her.

Her eyes were brimming making me regret what I just said but I stayed strong closing the door, shutting her out. She won't be able to read me anymore.

She drove off without a second passing and I just sat on the sidewalk hugging my knees. "Bails, you're back!" I hear Carmen walk out of the front door and I turn around seeing her smile drop. "Bailey, what happened?" She rushed to my side and she helped me stand up. "I let her go." I cry.

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Skylar's POV:

The second I parked in the driveway I wiped my face dry storming into the house. "SAGE!" I yelled his name then I hear stumbling coming from the kitchen and he comes into my sight. "Sky what happened?" He asks his eyes frantically searching everything on me.

I step towards him shoving his chest all the way to the wall, "IT'S YOUR FAULT YOU SENT ME THERE! YOU TOLD ME TO GO ON THIS STUPID TRADE!" I kept pushing him as he fought to keep my hands down. "HEY STOP IT! SKYLAR! STOP IT!" He gets a hold of my right hand but I continued to hit him.

"TELL ME WHAT HAPPENED!" He yells, I'm angry. I'm upset. I'm upset of what happened, how it happened and what I did to Beans, how I spoke to her. How could I? How could I speak to her the same way that her parents have done in the past? I rose my voice, I cussed her out. Over and over I cussed at her, I practically said it's her fault it all happened the way it did.

"It's my fault. I lost her Sage, I got mad at her. I- I lost her. I lost Bailey, she told me we're done! SHE DOESN'T WANT TO SEE ME EVER AGAIN!" I started to grow furious but then I gave up on attacking him then he brings me into a hug.

"I'm sorry." Is all he says rubbing my back. "I went on the trade, but he said he was expecting you and we fought. I attacked him after he said he had info on Liliana then. Then Bailey, she saw it all, everything I did to him. I don't even know if he's alive." I explain crying into his chest.

"It's your fault! YOU SHOULD'VE WENT NOT ME!" I pulled away seeing him try to reach out for me but I swat his hands away. "You should've gone, he wanted you. You KNEW Sage! You knew what I wanted to do after prom. What I wanted to ask but this fucking trade MESSED EVERYTHING I'VE WORKED HARD FOR! But no you had to make me go. I love her. I LOVE HER AND NOW, now- now I fucking lost her." I stabbed his chest with my finger and he didn't fight me.

I searched my pocket for the paper Malcolm held and I shoved it into my brother's hand. "Instead of fucking money, this is what he had. I don't want to do any more fucking trades, I'm done." I stormed away from him seeing Dean try to get my attention but I pushed him away too slamming my bedroom door shut.

I tore my prom clothes off using its dampness to clean my hands from the dried blood. Her words echoed in my head, she doesn't want me. She's done with me.

The deal's been over and I can't do shit now. She's not going to want to see me, she's probably going to lock her window, not respond to my texts or calls. I won't be able to visit her classes, walk her to class or feel her arms wrap around me as we ride my bike.

I threw my jacket somewhere in my room then something falls, I look at where I heard the crash and the poster I made for tonight sat on the floor, I was going to ask her out. Officially. I was going to ask her to be mine, so secrets, no hiding, I was even going to talk to her parents explaining why it should be me for their daughter, that they wouldn't have to worry.

I sunk onto my floor and I lay flat staring at the ceiling. With nothing but shame and regret, I blamed my brother, I blamed Malcolm, I blamed Bailey. I shouldn't have, it's my fault I hid this part of my life from her for so long.