The Reaper's Token

I Find a Practically Solar Powered Dave

The halls all looked identical as my footsteps echoed in the empty corridors.

"Hello?" I called. My voice reverberated in the silence. "Hello... ello... ello!" I called again.

"Great, I'm lost!" The word "lost" rang along the walls.

A faint blue light reflected off the tile from the corner of the next hall. Intrigued, I raced forward. My sneakers squeaked across the floors as I came to a halt. The strangest sight I had ever seen greeted me.

There, in the center of the room, surrounded by intense, blue lights of all sizes, was a quintessential 60's surfer lounging in a beach chair. He had one of those foil, tanning, mirror things opened under his chest that I've occasionally seen depicted in the movies. He was holding it up to reflect the light on his face.

Dave was naked except for his fishbone print, board shorts, and Vans. His nose had a white streak of sunscreen, and he was leaning back with pair of dark sunglasses resting over his eyes. I should mention that L&D is not close to any waves or surf shacks.

"Dave? What are you doing?" I asked as I squinted in the bright light.

"It's the apocalypse. The end of the world, Man." Dave said somberly, lowering his glasses. "I'm trying to soak up all the happiness I can get. You want one? It's free of charge, Dude." He shone a light in my face as he held one out to me.

I winced. "No thanks, Dave. I could use a little help finding the cafeteria, though. Could you point me in the right direction?"

"Sure, Dude, straight for six, then two to your right." He said.

"Great! Thanks!" I said.

I started for the hall as Dave sat up momentarily.

"Is that army really coming to overtake us?" Dave asked seriously.

"Yes," I said. "Violet has seen it, but it is so empty here that I wonder where everyone else is?"

"Home, eating out, or wherever their heart calls them," Dave said.

"Why aren't you home, Dave?" I asked.

"L&D is my home, Man! Where else am I going to get all this happiness? The world will get a lot darker after the apocalypse. So, I just thought I would spend my last moments in the sun, Bruh."

I struggled to look at Dave in the light. He was so white that he almost reflected the blue light off of himself in the glare.

The Army of the Dead is coming to L&D. At night.

I smiled as a crazy idea trickled into my brain.

"Hey, Dave," I said. "I think I will take a Blue Light of Happiness. Actually, I am going to need all of them."

"Dude, that's gonna be a lot of happiness!" Dave said in awe, sitting up from his lawn chair.

"Yes, Dave. Yes, it is." I said.

"What are you going to do with it?" Dave asked.

"Dave! Is there is a way to set them all off at once?" I asked as I picked one up off the shelf and squinted painfully into it.

"Sure thing. You just need to set the timer, Man," Dave said.

"Then, I've got a plan!" I said, grinning. "We're going to blind our enemies with happiness."

"Dude!" Dave admired. "Hardcore!"

"Ding!" My light pinged, and such an intense blue light hit my face that I accidentally dropped it.

Dave bent down to pick it up. "Do you want the sheet to cover the lights, too?" He asked.

"Sheet?" I asked.

Dave wheeled out two enormous lights - the kind you might see shining down on a mega band, concert stage.

It was clear that any Army of the Dead within a range of 1000 feet would be blind by purely concentrated, merciless happiness.

"I'll grab all the little ones, too!" Dave said. "I'll come back later for the sheet and the rest." We shoved the little lights into an old, rusted shopping cart which had a squeaky wheel and favored to the left.

"Thanks, Dave," I said. "What do I owe you?"

"No charge - you get the 'buddy' rate," Dave said. "You guys down in San Fran - Man, you guys need that blue light!"

"Thanks," I paused. "I don't know what to say."

"Just take them," Dave said, putting a hand on my shoulder. "Desperate times call for extreme happiness."

"You know, Dave, you can come with me if you want to," I said. "Maybe help us set up?"

"Seriously?" Dave asked as he stood a little taller.

"Sure, man," I said.

"Aw, sweet!" Dave cheered as he swung around and landed in the cart. The blue lights highlighted his hairy legs sticking out the front.

"Ride on, Man. Ride on!" he cheered. I wheeled us down the halls, and Dave cheered me on to go faster. The squeaking, rusty cart protested under the strain. As I swerved around the final turn, a collection of voices rang down the hall. Dave jumped out and helped me push the cart as we reached the light of the cafeteria.