institution for the gays (Poly) ✓ (COMPLETE) (5 Edited Chaps)

🌸 chap 3 /[revamp]\ 🌸

I've been sitting on my bed for the past hour or so, contemplating going down for breakfast.

It's 7:47am right now, and I haven't heard anything yet except a few of the boys walking around. One of them knocked on my door asking if I was awake, I didn't reply making him think that I was asleep.

I didn't want to face them because yesterday after dinner when I threw up, half the boys saw me. It was embarrassing, and I didn't know what they'd say or ask.

So I'm just hoping they will forget it happened and move on.

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Lunch had crept up on me faster than I was anticipating, so I knew I couldn't skip this time. The hallway was empty and the house was quiet, but there was a slight noise that followed further down to the dining room.

The stairs made no noise as I walked down the carpeted floor with bare feet. The door to the dining room was opened and I could see everyone sitting, plates full with all kinds of food.

My stomach grumbled slightly at all the delicious smells.

I walked into the room hesitantly, staring at everyone. I was biting the skin on my lip as I made no move towards the table.

There was one empty seat, for me, between two guys I couldn't remember the names of.

Fortunately, or for me, unfortunately, someone noticed me. I wouldn't even be mad had they not. Although I stick out like a sore thumb. Somehow.

"Neil, hey. Come sit down. We're not gonna bite." One of them said, waving me to the table.

I waited a few seconds before moving. It felt as though everyone's eyes and more were staring me down.

My feet tapped against the cold wooden floors, as I walked forward. The chair for me was sticking out the slightest for me to sit easier.

I let out the anxiety build up of air, and brought myself closer to the table. I got a load of smiles at me, no eyes bored the pity and sorrow I had more or less expected.

And I couldn't be more grateful, I didn't want to endure that, and keep my head down.

I swept my eyes over the bustling table, taking in the foods, there were loads of sausages, steaks, chops, bread and butter, pasta and potato salad and normal salad.

There was food galore, more than I listed, but it would be a long one.

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If they ever find out it would be taken from me. And in that case, I'd lose my shit. That's what that was yesterday as well, I lost it.

My parents never knew about it, they always thought I was the good kid.

When I was around 14 or 15, I started to get somewhat violent, and I didn't know why. So when I found a stash of weed in an alleyway I decided to take it with me, maybe try to make me forget about myself for a while. So I decided to grab it.

Had I known the path I would drown myself too, I would even think about grabbing it.

But I was desperate, for something. Anything.

My parents smoked too, so I took some of their papers and used them, I didn't know how to do it at all so I kinda had to look up how on YouTube.

And that's where I learned how to smoke weed for the first time. Though it wasn't pretty.

The first puff I choked on it, it wasn't the best taste either. And I kept going, trying to get used to it. And after half an hour or so I had managed not to cough like an asthmatic twat.