Into madness of it all: Arcane Jinx x male reader

What matters

You walked into the destroyed hideout where all of you used to hang out.

Jinx just stood outside, uncomfortably crossing her arms.
You look back at her with a smirk.
"You wanna stay outside or come in?"
She just shook her head, silently.
"Okay. Look, I won't be long. Be right there."
You walked in and took a look around.
The shooting range, the training dummy. It was all here.
You looked at the old scoreboard noticing your name just under Vi's on second place.
Memories came flooding to you and you allowed it.
Claggor and yourself talking about the Lanes.
Mylo and you arguing and you simply laughing it off.
Vi cheering you on as you fought the training dummy.
You and Powder shooting at the range.
It felt like home. Even just for a little while.

You quickly climbed your way up to your corner on the first floor, walking in.
Anything ranging from old comics to the now broken down furniture, which was once cozily placed here, now seemed like a far off memory.
You walked over to the corner, opening up the floorboards to reveal a small chest you had placed there.

You opened it up and took out the trinket Powder had made for you.
The grenade with the bear drawn on it. It had a rope attached so you could wear it as a necklace. You put it over your head and put it on.

"Failure."
You shot up and looked behind you. No one there. You tried to shake off what just happened. You weren't fully there yet, but things were getting better. Slowly.
You picked out the letter you hade made years ago. The ink still held!
After all these years, it needed no more hiding.
You simply took out the pen that was in there, which sorta worked. You crossed out the name and wrote another above it. You closed the letter and put it in your pocket. You left the room and the now empty chest, making your way outside.

Jinx greeted you with a smile as you got out.
"All done! Wanna hang out on the rooftops? For old times' sake?"
She just laughed and responded.
"You're on!"
She jumped up on the ledge and started climbing her way up.
You ran off and found a faster route, using lampposts and some of the older buildings jagged edges to quickly make your way up.

As Jinx put her hand on the edge of the roof, she was met with your hand.
"I win.", You exclaimed as she begrudgingly grabbed it and you hoisted her up.

For a second, it felt like back in the day, when you went on that job and you held Powder up.
"Not fair.", She muttered.
You simply chuckled.
"What did ya get, anyway?", She asked.
You showed your newfound necklace.
She immediately went wide eyed.
"You kept it?", She asked.
"You thought I'd forget this?", You smiled.

"This reminded me of what I was fighting for. I put it here when we were out trying to save Vander, I didn't want to lose it. I thought, 'I'm gonna come back with Vander, take this back, and Powder and me are gonna make this one grenade work.' Too bad shit went down then.", You said with a reminiscing smile.

"Sorry.", You heard her say weakly. She had gone to sit down and pulling her legs up towards her. You sat down next to her, overlooking the rooftops of the Lanes.
"Hey. It's alright. You wanted to help. I see that now."
"People see me as a murderer. Hell, I am. I have so much blood on my hands. And yet you... You're here. You still seem to care about me like you used to..."
"That's because I do care. I have my questions, yes. About what happened. Why. All that. But would you be willing to answer them now?"
She just looked at het hands.
"I don't know. There's so much."
"How about this. One question now. And we'll just go, day by day."
"Sure."

You took a deep breath.
"You killed someone. A girl with pink hair with the firelights. Why?"
"She reminded me of Vi and how she abandoned me.", She started woth a shaky breath.
"I didn't want to fire but... I remembered and I heard her voice and Mylo's and Claggor and I felt the pain and... I just...fired."

She turned to you as you looked at your hands.
"She was special to you, wasn't she?", Jinx asked.
"She was. In a way, she was the only one who kept me alive. When I learned that you and Vi and the guys were...gone. I...I couldn't. The people I cared about were gone. The only people I saw as a true family... Then she was there. Trying to pull me along, trying to keep me going."
"I'm sorry. She's gone because of me.", She said.
You put an arm over her shoulders.
"It's all Silco's doing. If not for him, things would've been far different."
She just leaned her head against your shoulder.
"I wish I could've been there. There for you.", You said softly.
"You're here now. That means a lot."
You just smiled.
"Okay, so. All those years have let me regret something. Regret something in particular. And now that we're here... It would be a shame if I didn't do it now.", You started talking.
You took the letter out of your pocket and handed it to her.
"It's still pretty heavy. So...just open it whenever you feel like it. It's just something I've worked on since we were young and it meant a lot to me."

"Oh, then I gotta open it!", She laughed as she opened it and started to read.
Her face changed as she continued to read it out loud.

"Dear Powder/Jinx,

I've been struggling with this for a while now and I don't really know how to tell you.

Ever since Vander took me in, you've been the bestest friend I could've wished for.

I love your ingenuity with your bombs and 'nades, even though they often don't work. You shouldn't worry about this. They'll work, as long qs you keep at it.

I love your enthusiasm every time we're out. Always looking to better yourself and be part of the team.

I love your smile, anytime we get to play and fool around in the hideout.

Anytime you're out of my sight, I catch myself worrying. Whether you're alright. Whether you'll be back. And every time again and again, I catch my relief when you finally show up again.

I've spent a lot of time with this letter. Writing and rewriting it over and over trying to come to grips with what this feeling is and how to tell you.

Stressful days, sleepless nights.

I think what I'm trying to say is this: I like you. Heck, I full-blown love you.

So. Do with that what you want. I just needed to get it out.

Love,
Y/N"

Silence befell her as you just looked to your own feet. For some reason you still felt embarrassed. But you wanted her to have it. You had beaten yourself up about it millions of times. Of missing that opportunity.

"You don't have to say anything. You don't even have to remembee it. I just couldn't let the chance pass by again.", You explained wothout looking at her.

"How long did you feel like this?", She asked.
"A while when I wrote that. Must've been a few weeks before everything went to hell. But I hid it, cus I was scared. Scared you'd hate me. Or you'd reject me. Big mistake in hindsight."

"Do you still feel that way? Even though I've changed?"
"Even though you've changed, so have I. But I still see that you still have the same ambitions. The same dreams. And besides. When I saw you on the bridge... And I came to grips that it was really you..."
You put your hand over your chest.
"Something happened. It's as if something mended itself in me. My heart skipped more than a single beat and I felt relief wash over me. Just like back then."

"So yes. I feel the same way still.", You smiled.
You turned to her, seeing her almost shocked face.
Your face turned a shade of red as the silence dragged on a bit.
"Look. It's okay if you don't feel that way. I just didn't want the opportunity to pmmmhh.."

You were shut up by her lips crashing onto yours as she kissed you and clung to you, arms draped over your shoulder.
You let it happen and melted into the kiss, putting your hands on her waist.
It didn't matter what was going to happen.
What mattered was that gou had her at your side.