Color Blind

Chapter Thirty-Five

AN: Alice in Chains' 'Shame in You'. Possibly my favorite song off their self-titled record. Toss-up between this and 'Head Creeps'.

* * *

Cole looked at the phone. Such a harmless thing, really, this smooth black telephone. He wanted it far away from him.

Just get it over with.

His fingers dialed the number too quickly for him to change his mind and then it was ringing. Maybe Sean wouldn't be home.

He had never been that lucky before, and that streak didn't change now. After a few more rings, there was a click and then, "Hello? Is this O..."

"Dad?" The word didn't feel right in his mouth. It felt like an overly sour candy-slightly enjoyable but mostly terrible. "I-it's me."

"Cole!" Ah, there was the twinge of guilt he'd been expecting. "Where are you, I can come and pick you up..."

"No."

Dead silence.

"Cole?"

"I moved out. I'm sorry." Why was he apologising again? "I had to move out, Dad, I mean it. I had to."

"If this is about our argument..."

"It's not just that." The words came fast now, tripping over each other in their eagerness to get out. "It's that you got me hooked on something that could kill me. You kept me locked up like a prisoner. I've got scars on ninety percent of my body because of you! I had to get out, Dad...God, I'm sorry..."

Now that the flood of words was over he was starting to shake. He was not about to cry, not now, but after he hung up...

"Cole, listen to me..."

"I have to go. Don't worry about me. I'm fine. That's all I wanted to do, is let you know I'm okay."

"Do you have any idea how worried I've been?" Sean shouted. Cole cringed. "I come home to find my boy gone, with only a crappy note about his girlfriend on the dining room table!"

"I'm sorry." he whispered again. "I'm sorry."

"Come home, buddy."

Yeah, right, and get a broken neck? It would take ropes and chains to get him back in there, and even then he wouldn't make it easy for them.

"I have to go. I..." He took a deep breath. Might as well spit it out. "I love you. Please don't call this number."

"Cole..."

He hung up. He was expecting the phone to ring again, but it didn't. He placed the phone back on the hook and retreated to the couch. After a few minutes of lying there staring at the ceiling, he rolled over and let the tears come.

* * *

Nancy was home a little later than she would have liked-traffic-and she wanted nothing more than a hot shower and something to eat. Maybe-was this really true?-maybe food first.

She wasn't expecting to see that there were several missed calls from an unknown number. She also wasn't expecting the lights to all be out. Finally, she wasn't expecting Cole to be passed out cold on the sofa, his face streaked with tears. He was curled up into a ball, clutching a little plush snake in his hands. The scene would have been adorable if he hadn't looked so lost and scared.

"Cole?" she whispered. He stirred and tightened his grip on the snake. She'd wake him later, then, after her shower.

That night's shower had to be a speed record for her-twenty minutes!-and it was not as enjoyable as it usually was. What had gone on today? He'd said he was going to call his dad, but she hadn't believed that he'd really do it.

Her hair was still dripping when she went back out and turned on a few lights. Cole hadn't moved and she hated to wake him. All the same, they both needed to eat something and she wanted to know what was wrong with him. Hopefully he wasn't sick again.

"Cole? Wake up. Dinnertime."

He groaned and rolled over a bit. Nancy sat on the floor next to the sofa and said his name again.

It took a few minutes, but he finally opened his eyes a bit. He didn't look awake all the way.

"Cole?" she said softly.

"Nance."

"Hey."

He blinked and moved a little bit more, his plush snake disappearing under his pillow. Nancy didn't mention it.

"What time is it?"

"Six forty-five." He swallowed. "Are you okay?"

He shook his head and closed his eyes again.

"No."

"What's wrong?"

"I called my dad today." he mumbled. "That's all. I don't want to talk about it, Nance, please..."

"Okay."

He still hadn't moved when she went to make soup-from-a-can. She thought he'd gone back to sleep when she brought him a bowl, but he hadn't.

Dinner was a silent affair all the same and by the time she returned from her shower, he'd fallen back asleep.