Come What May

Chapter 16

Hermione emerged from the bedroom an hour later, ready to apologize. She had calmed down, and knew full and well that what she had said to Severus had not been kind. When she entered the living room, she did not see him, but could hear loud clanging noises coming from the room beneath the stairs.

"Severus?" She called, knocking gently on the door. The black-haired wizard opened the door a crack, a dark green apron tied around his waist. The sleeves of his white shirt were rolled up to his elbows.

"What?" He spat.

"I came to apologize."

"Don't." Severus slammed the door in her face, going back to work on brewing more potion. Severus started to add the Boomslang skin to his cauldron, but sat on the stool, hunched over. His joints ached, his head pounded. The wizard knew that the potion was not working as it had for the last few years... The efficacy had begun to weaken, and he could feel it in every part of his body. Beneath his fingernails, splinter hemorrhages striped his nail beds purple. Tightness in his neck caused Severus to straighten, rolling his head from shoulder to shoulder.

"Severus, please." Her voice was soft and small from behind the door to his study. Pushing her voice out of his head, Severus came to his feet and poured his attention back into brewing the potion. Yet again, he poured the blue liquid into 30 vials, placing a cork carefully into each bottle. As the wizard sat the crate against the wall, he looked around. To his right was a wall full of glass cases, his own personal store. Along the left wall sat a desk where he could grade, and a small corner of the room devoted to his exercise equipment. Dumbells and a standing pull-up bar rested in front of the window.

In the center of the room was his work table, customized to be at his height. The shining cauldron sat above a bunsen burner, and the surface surrounding it was cluttered. A palm-sized knife, two lost sprigs of lavender, and his open potions text was spread across the top of his table.

The wizard made his way across the room, sitting behind his desk, opening one of the side drawers. He removed a well-worn photograph, tracing his finger over the glossy surface. Lily danced before him, her violent red hair spinning behind her as she smiled widely. Snow fell around her, her hands spread out beside her to catch snowflakes. It was the one piece of her he had left. Severus inhaled and exhaled deeply, watching the photograph move in front of him. What would Lily have told him? Would she have told him to do the right thing and be James' godfather? Or would she have told Severus to say no and then be honest with Hermione? His head was conflicted with thoughts on both sides and he tried to shove them out. In his heart, Severus knew Lily wanted him to watch over Harry, and now, Harry's family. It was the right thing to do.

He had done so many things wrong in his life, pushing away Lily being the biggest mistake he'd ever made... If he had only listened to her and gone away from the dark arts, Severus thought. He clenched his jaw, blinking back tears. He could still smell her, jasmine and old books. The scent overwhelmed him, and he had to look around to see if she was really there. With sadness, he tucked the photograph back into the drawer, closing it. His eyes shut for a brief moment, picturing her. Severus always imagined Lily spread out on the grass in front of the lake, her eyes closed, her face turned towards the sun. Her porcelain skin sparkled, and she opened her vivid green eyes to turn over and look at him.

The feeling was all too surreal, flashbacks bombarding his nostalgia. Severus stood quickly, leaving the study and locking it with his wand. The living room was dark, only a subtle glow of the fire lighting his way up to the bedroom. Hermione sat in bed, reading with her eyes behind her tortoise-shell glasses. As he stood in front of the wardrobe, undressing, Hermione watched. Severus stood in a pair of grey boxers, pulling on a pair of black lounge pants. When he turned to face her, the witch darted her eyes back to the book in front of her.