a/n: sorry this chapter is kinda short but i've had a really bad day and i needed some fluff in my life
For the first time in over a month, I have another nightmare.
This one starts out good, like, really good. Like, kissing Owen good. Gave me a false sense of confidence because the dream immediately went downhill.
Owen's face morphed into someone else's, someone I haven't thought about in a while. The one and only dude I've ever really liked before, and also the dude who made me swear off any sort of romantic relationship for a while.
Liam is the only person who I've sort of almost dated. Except he only liked the fact that I gave him attention. About a week into our "relationship," he tried to pressure me into more physical stuff, and I wasn't comfortable with it, considering I had never done it before and I hadn't even known him that long. As soon as I jerked back when he tried to kiss me, that was it.
I knew he was a jerk, and I knew all he wanted was someone to give him the attention and validation he craved. That made it really easy to get over him. However, he was friends with practically the entire school. It felt like everyone turned on me that year.
In the dream, I pull back from the kiss and open my eyes and see Liam's face where Owen's used to be. Naturally, I scream.
"You'll never be good enough for him, Jennifer. Just like you weren't enough for me," he snarls. "Good luck getting someone to love you when you refuse to get close to them." After he says that, he disappears, leaving me all alone in a dark room. I can't make anything out, all I can hear is the silent sobs coming from my dream self.
When I pull myself out of the nightmare and back to reality, I can feel a warm hand on my cheek wiping away my tears. I must've been crying in my sleep because I can feel the tear streaks down my face and neck.
I slowly open my eyes to see a very concerned Owen. His hand is still on my cheek, but his eyes widen once he sees mine open.
"Hey, nightmare?" he asks softly. I just nod and start crying even more. The nightmare really shook me up, but the fact that Owen is here, trying to take care of me after it... it's a little too much to handle.
When I start breaking down into full-on silent sobs, Owen immediately pulls me into his arms, which just makes me cry even harder. He runs his fingers through my hair and down my back, knowing that it calms me down. He stays silent, knowing that he needs to let the sobs pass before he starts talking.
He knows me too well.
Once the sobs stop and only a few tears are coming out, I pull back from his embrace. I can see in his eyes that he's really worried, but he squeezes my hands letting me know that he's there.
"Do you wanna talk about it?" he whispers, and I contemplate telling him about it. It did start with me kissing him, and that isn't exactly something I want to admit to him right now. So I decide to tell him half of the truth.
"It was Liam- some stupid guy that I haven't even thought about in a while. He was the only person I've ever been in a relationship with, but it only lasted for a week. And for good reason. But basically, he told me that I'll never be good enough for anyone else, just like I wasn't good enough for him."
"Oh, Jenny," he says, pulling me into another hug. "You're more than good enough. Don't listen to dream Liam. He doesn't know anything. You're amazing. And I'll keep reminding you."
He pulls back from our hug, and I look back at his concerned but compassionate eyes. I feel like he knows there's something more to the nightmare, but he doesn't press. "Thank you. It's just... unnerving, you know? Seeing someone who you haven't thought about in so long and watch them tell you weren't good enough all over again."
"What happened between you two? If you don't mind me asking, of course," he says.
"I don't know, I think we both got all caught up in the teenage romance thing. He was desperate and so was I. Except he wanted attention. About a week in, he tried to kiss me and I refused to let him. So he left, and never came back. I don't know what he told everyone, but it seemed like the whole school turned against me that year."
"I'm so sorry, Jenny. You didn't deserve that," he tells me. "You're worth so much more than what he led you to believe. And the fact that he wasn't okay with you not wanting to kiss him... it makes me sick. People need to learn to respect boundaries."
"Yeah. I kinda knew he was a jerk, and I didn't exactly want to waste my first kiss on him. It just seemed wrong."
"Wait, you said Liam was the only person you've ever been in a relationship with?" he asks, and I nod. "So you've never had your first kiss?"
I look away from his gaze, suddenly extremely embarrassed that he figured that out. "Yes, Owen. I'm almost twenty and still haven't had my first kiss. No need to point it out," I tease.
"No, I'm not trying to make fun of you for it, I'm just surprised."
"Well, it's not like I ever had many options. After the catastrophe with Liam, no one really wanted to get with the girl who turned down pretty much the most popular jock at our school."
"I bet if they had actually known you, they would've thought differently," he says, wiping away another one of my tears.
"Maybe, but it's okay. Most of the people at my school were jerks anyway."
He gives me a sad smile and pulls me closer to him so that I'm laying with my head on his shoulder, still eye to eye with him. "Do you think you can go back to sleep?" he asks quietly.
"I can try. You're here, so that helps."
"I'm here. And I'm not leaving," he assures me, pressing a kiss on my forehead. Good thing it's dark so he can't see my face go bright red at the gesture.
"Owen?" I say, and he looks back down at me. "Thank you."
"Anytime, Jenny. Want me to play with your hair until you fall asleep?"
"Please," I blurt out, a little too fast. Owen notices because he gives me a grin before running his fingers through my hair. I nuzzle my head into him, acting as if he's my pillow.
"You're enough, Jenny. Whether you believe it or not," he whispers to me. "And I'm always here if you need a reminder."
