Infatuated with a God

Chapter Forty-Three

The next day I wallowed in self-hatred and self-pity, avoiding most people with the excuse of a hangover. Of course, Nat remembered I didn't drink that much, but smirked at me when she glanced at my neck. It was sore from Loki's anger last night, but I had forgotten to look at it, dreading how dark it was. It was only worse when Thor and Loki walked in to get breakfast at the moment my tea was still brewing and my bread toasted. There was quite a bit of muffled laughter when they saw the mark on Thor's neck as well. Thor's eyes widened when he glanced at my neck and cast his eyes down, it looked like shame and I sighed. Of course, I would find myself in this situation. Still, I refused to retreat out of a need to preserve some sense of decency somehow. So, I stayed through breakfast, slipping into the conversation an imagined headache, and excusing myself from the day's meetings. Since I was on house arrest it didn't really matter if I was there so with a snide comment Tony happily let me miss them. I glowered at his comment and the sniggers that followed, briefly catching Loki's expression of complete uninterest. He couldn't hide the way the atmosphere felt to thicken in his anger, however. I could imagine him finding Thor's mark only worsened his mood. Eventually people filtered out of the room, leaving Thor, Loki, and myself. Not wanting to be anywhere near the two of them, I went to leave before internally cursing when Thor called after me to stop. He walked over to me and brushed the hair off of my neck with a frown.

"I am so sorry, Kaya. I didn't mean to hurt you this badly, sometimes I forget my own strength." I let him believe it, despite every part of me protesting.

"Thor, it's really alright. I actually enjoyed the mark." I glanced briefly at Loki who smirked knowing it was directed at him.

Thor then asked me to sit and talk with him and I couldn't exactly say no. I knew the conversation that was coming and hated myself for getting into this predicament. Thor needed reassurance that I was okay over last night, Loki would get pissed at that reassurance, and meanwhile I just wanted to curl up into bed and sleep the day away.

"Kaya, I truly am sorry for my behaviour last night." I groaned, wishing to ask Loki to leave but knowing there was literally no chance he would. Time to toe the line.

"Thor stop, it's okay. If anything, I should be sorry. I was in a rather bad mood last night and it was wrong to take it out on you." I kept Loki firmly in my peripheral vision, hoping to notice any change in his demeanour that would give away if I hit a nerve. Thor shook his head and frowned.

"Still, I shouldn't have been so rough with you." I sighed, hating the corner I was forced into.

"Thor I led last night. Nothing happened that I didn't initiate. Something had left me rather frustrated last night, so roughness is what I needed. In fact, I quite enjoyed it." The last part caused Loki to tighten his body and I quickly corrected myself. "But while I liked the roughness, I still regret last night. Not because of your actions by mine. I think we should just forget what happened, honestly." There was no sign that this helped Loki, but it seemed to reassure Thor. I had eventually managed to excuse myself from the conversation, telling them I should go to try to train.

Loki offered to join me, making some excuse about practicing with his daggers. Not wanting to push it. I didn't turn it down. We walked to the elevator in silence but as soon as the doors closed I was pushed against the wall and his lips met mine ferociously. I leant into his motions completely, enjoying the minty taste mixed with the taste of the human version of his mother's tea on his breath. He pulled away from me and straightened just before the elevator doors opened. Eventually, I managed to regain my focus and left, noticing how we came out to our floor and not the floor with the training room. He walked off into his bedroom without looking back and I placed my fingers over my lips in confusion and want. It was the most forward he had been since he said he wouldn't touch me. At that moment I knew he was also losing his reserve. His jealousy and insecurity winning over his desire for complete control. He also looked tired, his magic feeling almost weak from overuse of the limited supply he had. So, I made my way into my room with conviction and took my time creating my plan. Tonight was the night I made sure Loki gave in to me without begging. I was sure of it. It was too clear that we both needed each other, and I truly believed we could just both give into each other. Neither of us winning or losing this stupid game.