Infatuated with a God

Chapter Forty-Two

Another ten days passed, my monotonous schedule which I once found comfort in no longer providing me any comfort. Loki would still train me but resorted to teasing me most of the time. He would distract me with a hand brushing my arm, or by pressing himself into me when correcting my stance. It added for my overwhelming need for him, but also to my anger for the fact that he was still refusing to touch me. I didn't bother inviting anyone around to try after that one night. It only added to my frustration, and I felt guilty using people in that way now I knew it was Loki who I craved above anyone. My own hands were never truly enough anymore. I still came but the orgasms were still pathetic. But I knew I couldn't give into him the way he wanted still. To make the active choice whilst remaining completely logical was just not an option. He still couldn't be trusted, and it felt wrong to give myself over to him in that way. It would be like admitting he owned me like some kind of sexual slave. And that would not be happening. I also refused to give him the satisfaction of avoiding him, with his freedoms increasing and the cuff allowing him access to more of his seiðr it was no use anyway. If he wanted to he could find me anyway, plus I didn't want to go back to ignoring Thor just to avoid Loki. It did mean, however, that Loki would often join Thor and me in the evenings when we would watch movies. Thor was ecstatic that his brother was making more of an effort into spending time with him and others, confiding in me that it had felt like how they used to spend time together. I didn't have the heart to warn him that it might not be the case, nor the willpower to explain what was actually happening. How he would tease me every time Thor went to get a drink or grab the food. I tried to cuddle into Thor more just to get away from him but that only seemed to make him bolder and braver in his mischievous exploits, so now I just stayed firmly in the middle of the sofa.

Besides evenings with Thor, I actively tried to spend time with the people I had been ignoring too much over the past few months. Wanda, Nat, and I actively tried to plan a girls night at least once a month. It mostly consisted of us getting wasted and talking over movies. It finally happened on a Saturday in mid-March, Nat making sure that all the men weren't to disturb us in the longue for too long. In fact, in the text, I'd overseen from Thor's screen it stated that if they had to use the kitchen that they were permitted in it for 15 minutes only. I smiled at Nat's effort and was sure Wanda appreciated it. Nat had also brought three large bottles of good quality vodka for us all. I took it slightly easier than normal, mixing mine with Diet Coke instead of drinking it neat, hesitant about falling back into unhealthy habits. It wasn't long, however, until me and Nat were healthily tipsy, and Wanda far gone and even talking about her sex life. I laughed at Nat questioned the logistics of Vision's anatomy and Wanda gave a not entirely cohesive response. Before questioning Nat about who she was seeing, a slight blush settled over her cheeks, and I laughed softly at seeing any sort of embarrassment on Nat's face for the first time.

"Before you say no one, don't act like you haven't been teasing poor Banner for months." I choked on my drink, surprised by the thought.

"Banner?" I shrilled slightly too loudly. Her blush deepened, not matching the nonchalant tone she forced her voice to take.

"You act like if you haven't been railing a literal God, Kaya." My breath caught in the second it took me to remember she was referring to Thor and not Loki.

"I've been meaning to ask what is going on between you two, сестра?" I laughed at confiscated Wanda's vodka, storing it in Loki's subspace before she could grab it.

"I know you've had enough when you call me your sestra, Wanda." Nat laughed at the frown on Wanda but wisely didn't move to give her anymore.

"What is happening between you and Thor, Kaya?" Nat asked, leaving me no room to ignore her.

"It's nothing serious really. We don't like each other in a romantic way, I guess. We are really close friends who sometimes fuck each other. It works for us, I guess." Nat nodded knowingly while Wanda's eyebrows creased in thought. The conversation continued, moving on from my sex life at least so I had assumed it was forgotten. That was until Wanda asked how it was to have sex with a God. I couldn't help but blush, remembering Loki's hands.