Carlo

Chapter 55

Looking up I notice him doing paperwork, "Lexi touched me." I shudder, realising what fully happened.

Giovanni pauses and looks at me confused, "Where?" I raise my eyebrows at him and he seems to get the memo, "Have you told Adelaide?"

"She's still talking to mom, I will after." I take the elastic band off around the book and wrap it around my wrist before opening up the book.

Some book entries:

'Some days I want to live and others I want to die.'

'My head has become too loud.'

"The day I die will be the happiest night of my life. I will be free.'

'I know I shouldn't get attached to this temporary feeling.'

End of some entries.

I flip through the book more skin reading the pages until the right becomes dark and concerning.

' Dear Journal,
Life is supposed to be a beautiful lie. Whereas death is the painful truth.
But why is death looked upon as negatively?
It's the welcoming hug you receive after your time is up. Whether that be 18 or 81 years. Considering no one has yet come back to intrigue us with their experience, it must be amazing. My chances of being born were 1 in 400 trillion.
If life is supposed to be the greatest gift of all...
Why is death always on my mind?

Amore, xx'

I pause as I feel my eyes tear up. I turn the next page and then next looking at the names on the top of a few pages,

'To Izzy.'

'To Giovanni and Alessia.'

'To Rose.'

'To Carlo.'

I read mine and read it properly. About how she felt at the start, like she wasn't good enough because I slept around and then called her mine. The way I changed her mind on the situation and helped her become confident, but also the way she feels trapped in her own mind and she wants to escape.

I shouldn't have read this... if she wanted me to know she would tell me.

She's going to think I invaded her privacy.

You did idiot.

What do I do?

End of flashback:

Okay maybe I was overreacting a little but why did I even feel the need to go through it in the first place.

This book seems to be her safe place.

Adelaide doesn't say anything with her face still pale until she pushes off the counter and storms out of the kitchen.

"Adelaide!" I shout, running after her with tears falling down my face.

Adelaide speed walks around the house until she gets to a door, she kicks it open and inside is a guy with Lexi on top. Adelaide storms inside and yanks her to the ground climbing on top of Lexi and throwing punches after punches to her face.

Lexi starts to bleed and the guy she was on top of, scurries around the room before running out, I step to the side letting him run out.

"Touch him again and I won't care that you're a mom. I'll fucking kill you." Adelaide punches her one more time before getting off her, leaving Lexi crying beneath her.

Adelaide kicks her in the rib and whispers something in her ear that I can't make out. She walks past me and I follow after her like some lost puppy with its tail between its legs, Adelaide walks out of the house after shouting bye and goes into a car on the drivers side.

I follow her lead and get in the passenger side. The car ride is quiet until we get close to the penthouse.

"Have you still got it?" She asks, referring to the book.

"Yeah." I answer. "Are you angry at me for reading it?"

Adelaide sighs. "No. I think I would've struggled telling you if you hadn't found it."

"Were you actually going to do it?"

Adelaide pulls up in front of the apartment. "Yeah." She whispers, before getting out and I follow once more to the elevator.

"I'm sorry." I apologise. "For the girls. And everything."

She nods her head and gives me a small smile.

The elevator dings and we both walk out, Adelaide goes over to the couch and lays down on her back with her head turned to the window.

"Can I hold you?" I ask once I'm standing near her.

"Yeah." She whispers, holding her arms out not removing her eyes from the window.

I lay down her chest resting my head on her breasts and the rest of myself between her legs, I wrap my arms under her and close my eyes.

"Please don't leave me." I whisper into the silence.

Adelaide's hand finds my hair and she plays with my curls whilst the other holds my pinky in hers.

"Go to sleep Carlo. I'm not going anywhere, not right now." She mumbles.

I know I can't make her stay, I can help but if she has her mind built into leaving she will do so. Whether she lets me know or not is up to her.

I just have to be with her in the moment because I never know when or if she will be snatched away from my grip.

"Do you forgive me?" I mumble.

"For reading my book?" She questions.

I nod my head.

"Yeah. You scared me for a second. I thought it was something a little worse than that." She chuckles.

"I might have overreacted a little." I chuckle with her. I hold her tightly and kiss her chest. "I love you."

"I love you more." She whispers.

I wait until her breathing goes steady and calm before I go to sleep myself, squeezing her every now and again to make sure she's still there.