Thirty-One

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Everything was not fine.

The fast-approaching, heavy footfalls grew louder as they neared. It didn't take long for Axel to catch up. He looked sinfully dishevelled. It was a shame he had taken the time to tuck himself away. I would have welcomed the distraction his humiliation would have brought. 

Sadly, I had a feeling he wouldn't have minded the attention, perhaps even welcome it.

"Lady Riar?"

Lady June looked at me with concern. Her eyes flicked between me and Axel, her brows furrowed.

Axel's chest heaved lightly with laboured breaths. Although he appeared better than a few minutes ago, sweat beaded on his brow, darkening and plastering a few strands of his violet hair to his skin. His storming grey and sliver eyes darted towards me, a hint of alarm flared the molten metal.

For a moment time seemed to slow as my eyes met Lady June's blue-toned brown ones again. The distant sounds of rustling leaves and descant wildlife that could mutely be heard through the thick windows faded, the sound of blood rushing through my veins and the pounding of my heart drowned them out.

For a moment, just one, I pictured what would happen if I told her- if I opened my mouth and ended the play that the Lords of the manor had unknowingly cast them in.

Would she believe me? Would she trust the words I said? Would she come to my aid and help me?

I would never know.

Because telling Lady June everything was not fine wouldn't fix anything. It would only make it worse.

It would give Cassius all the incentive he needed to tell Lady June of my origins. He would sign my death certificate if what I had been told was true.

If not wanting to face death wasn't enough of an incentive to keep the charade going, not wanting to lose the only people I had in this strange and unknown world would be another.

My friends would hate me. 

Despite how they treated me, the five Lords treated their workers very well. I knew Henry, Kai, and Timothy sympathized with my struggles and bad mouth their lords to give me a chance to rant, but I could see in the way they looked at them and followed their orders that they respected the men. They would hate me if I was the reason they had to return to the kind of life that they claimed the Lords saved boys and men from.

But worse than that, it would turn Ezra against me. 

I knew he cared about me, or at least I was convinced he did, but I was not delusional enough to think he would pick me over his friends. 

I wasn't delusional enough to think that getting him in trouble would keep me endeared to him.

So, I wiped my tears with the back of my hand and put on a wide, cheek aching grin that dripped in artificial sweetness as I let out a fake, belly-deep laugh.

Shaking my head, I waved off her concerns with a hand. "No," I said, trailing off my laughter as I wiped one last tear from the corner of my eye. "Everything's fine. The incubus was getting a bit cocky so I had to teach him a lesson. He doesn't know how to function once the tears go off," I looked towards Axel, the forced smile strained the muscles in my face. "It's fun watching him get flustered and panicked," I added, playing into the role they painted of the women of this world.

When my eyes returned to Lady June, I found her looking at me skeptically. It was for a moment before the crease between her brows smoothed and she grinned back at me. "Who knew the unattainable incubus couldn't handle tears," she laughed.

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