Man of the Match | DaiSuga

Chapter 25

CW / TW : Sappy and adorable! Enjoy the cringe my dudes :D

Sugawara POV :

Monday morning, despite having about five hours sleep over the entirety of the weekend, I found myself awake bright and early, as if I should be setting off to practice. My phone began to ring, lifting it off of my bedside table I checked the caller ID: Daichi <3. Yeh... no, not this early. I rejected the call sending it to voicemail. He was nothing if not persistent, the relentless calls and text messages, I don't know what to say to him. He is probably only wanting to make things alright to fix his own conscious, I'm not sure I could face him right now. 

Given the early hour, it should be nice and peaceful outside yet instead I could hear the plodding of footsteps, it was almost like they were pacing outside the house. Groaning I hauled myself out of bed before swinging the curtains open only to see... Daichi? He was pacing outside of my house, tapping his phone to his chin. I could see his torso slouched over, he looked worse for wear. Bags hung under his eyes, his hair still a mess, his shoulder slumped, his chest was raising and falling heavily and I noticed his left hand shaking. Suddenly fearful in-case he noticed me I found myself ducking down below my windowsill. Why the hell is Daichi here? I rubbed my eyes making sure I wasn't sleeping before checking back over the windowsill. Sure enough he was still there, still pacing, still looking worked up. He has no right to be here! The rage and emotion began to bubble again as I opened my window and called over. "You shouldn't be here."

He stopped dead, his face turning to look at me as he pulled a face reminiscent of a deer caught in headlights. He had opened his mouth to speak but nothing came out. He repeated the blubbering motion several times still with no noise. He began to trying to make gestures with his hands, clearly intent on speaking but just not doing it. "If you don't spit it out and leave you're going to be late for practice." I yelled over coldly, if he had come just to mock me then he can leave. After the amount of tears shed this weekend over this fucking idiot I am not going to sit here and let him mock me. 

He clenched his fists, panicking before finally saying something. He yelled my name at me before stuttering out a load of gibberish. This was really out of character for him, at first I thought he was joking but the more I watched I could see it was becoming more and more real for him. The panting of his chest, the glazed over look beginning to settle over his eyes, the shaking in his hands and knees. He was panicking, in fact it looked like a panic attack had started to dig it's claws into him. Noticing his struggle, I turned away closing my window and began trying to get a jacket and some slippers so I could go out to him. 

"Morning Koshi!" Rei smiled as I entered the downstairs kitchen, "You ok?" He asked me as I grabbed his jacket throwing it on since it will hide my chest, he frowned at this, noticing my rush. I plopped my slippers down before going outside. I looked around but he was no longer stood in front of my house - where had he gone?

"Dai?" I asked gently from my front door, unsure where he had vanished. Maybe he ran away. Just as I had started thinking he had left, I heard a light sob from behind my garden wall. Quickly making my way down the garden path I saw Daichi, cradling himself, his head resting on his knees as heavy breaths wracked through him, shaking his entire being. Gently I put my hand on his shoulder, not wanting to startle him but he was already pretty worked up. "Dai?" I asked again, hoping it may calm him. His stuttering and mumbling had stopped but he quickly swatted my hand away before scrambling away, picking himself up and standing. 

"NO DON'T TALK!" He practically screamed it at me, as his hands wrapped around himself and he avoided my eyes. I simply stood and watched him. What was happening to him?  "I - I need to speak first. I will, I don't want it to happen again, I..." He was still fumbling with his words, still refusing to meet my gaze. I simply kept my distance and allowed the silence to fall between us.

After a minute or two, he eventually spoke up, he looked to be calmer in himself, the shaking had stopped and his breathing had evened. "I need you in my life Koshi." He said, it was only seven words and they sent a burning flush to his cheeks. Another long pause carried as he awkwardly put his hands in his pockets, "I need you to be part of my routine." A routine?  I raised an eyebrow, not sure what that meant but I allowed him to keep the space to speak.

"I know it's only been two days, I know you probably need time," Understatement of the century Daichi, of course I need time, but you're here now and I aren't complaining too much. "I need to get some things off my chest that I never said before." He seemed to have completely calmed in himself now, as if starting from scratch." I nodded to tell him to continue as he glanced at me, asking for permission.

He let out a sigh, clearing his head before continuing. "I just need you Koshi, I need you to be there with me on Sunday mornings - sleeping on your futon near the door. I need to see you at morning and afternoon practice, I can't babysit the first years alone! I need to see your messages every night in order to sleep well and I need to walk to school with you every day." It felt raw and emotional as he talked, he seemed to be surprising himself. He blushed prematurely as if preparing himself for embarrassment.

"Asahi asked me why it hurt so much when you walked away; it felt like a dagger had been driven into my chest and I had just been left to bleed. I told Asahi that you were my sun and I was Icarus. From the beginning I knew you would be the death of me, but I never ever cared because if I am to die by your side than that will have been enough. You walking away was you melting my wings and I began just falling. I never really hit the ground - until this morning I guess." He rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. "My point is, Icarus could never be with the sun, but I would gladly burn for you Koshi!" 

He would burn for me? What does that even mean? He needs me, he wants me buy his side? I don't want to lose him either but what has he even confessed to?