THANK YOU guys for 1K READS!!! ❤️ It means so much to me and I appreciate every single of of you guys 💋 Love you all babies xoxo ___________________________________________________________________________ Hi all! Quick disclosure for this chapter - This includes, talk and the act of an Eating disorder, which could be triggering. If this would be in anyway upsetting towards you, please don't read! xoxo
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Tru Colton
I sat on the sofa staring at the lying, scumbag himself. He had passed out after I nocked him over the head...again.
I'm currently on my 4th glass of whiskey, which was more than normal for me when I'm stressed, and right now; I'm at my worst. I haven't been this stressed since...him.
The old ways I was away form came flooding back to the surface. Who I was only a year ago, and what I overcame. But my trust issues seem to have sky rocketed in the last 24 hours. I stood up taking my gun with me and placing my glass in the kitchen sink before making my way to my bedroom.
The bedroom had a huge bed, it was a black high-gloss frame, and high back. The wall where all white, with accents of white and black through out the whole room. The floors ran the same as the rest of the apartment – white marble.
I stepped into he bathroom, which had the same flooring, a floor to ceiling window, where a huge bath tub sat. The shower was on the opposite wall, with a stone-grey tile surrounding it, and 3 glass walls. Off the side was a door leading to a small bathroom, and to the other side was a large basin.
I ignored how beautiful it was, walking over the to basin and opening one of the drawers. I hunted looking for soaps or bubble bath for me to relax in. When I cam across a light grey toothbrush. I picked it out and looked my self in the mirror. Willing myself not to do it. Not to have worked so hard and go back to my old ways.
I never got help, I did it on my own. I worked by myself without anyone elses support, without the care from anyone else.
But doing it only once...it might take my pain and stress away.
I gripped the brush tightly, and walked into the toilet, closing the door and locking it behind me. I know Ashton is tied up, but he is a sneaky fucker.
I knelt in front of the toilet and opened the lid. Every instinct in my body told me to slap myself, and pull me away from the trance I was in. To not revert back to this. To remember how unwell, I was.
But my body couldn't move.
I flipped the toothbrush, so I was holding the brush part and pushed the other end down my throat, until I was gagging. I pushed further, until I was violently sick, I continued a couple times over until I felt I was empty, then I had only bile coming up from my empty stomach.
