Siempre y Para Siempre - A Lippa Fanfic

Chapter 8 - A Bad Day for Bad News

Pippa POV

8:04 AM

"I- What do you mean?" A hand comes up and covers my mouth. Renée and Jazzy share puzzled looks as they turn their attention back to me. They can't hear my mother on the phone, so they have no idea what's going on. "Mom? I don't understand..."

"Phillipa, they did everything they could. I wish you were here." I could tell my mom was trying to pull herself together. My eyes start to well up with tears.

"I-I didn't know he was that sick. Why didn't you tell me? I would have come back home if I had known." I feel a few tears run down my face, but I stare at the ground, not wanting Renée's or Jazzy's concern for me to grow.

"I'm sorry. I didn't know he was going to go so soon. And I knew you were doing the show, too. I didn't want you to have to worry about him."

"I wish I was there to say goodbye..." I pause for a second. "Listen, I have to go, but I'll call you back later. Hang in there, Mom. I love you."

"Ok, talk to you later. I love you too."

I hang up the phone and say to the two women in front of me, "Remember how I said my life couldn't get any worse?"

They nod, looking at me with blank expressions.

"It just did. That was my mom on the phone. S-She called to say-" I start sobbing at the thought. I can't handle any more stress. I was already crying for the past few days, but I try to pull myself together when I was with my friends. But now, I'm done holding myself together. My life is falling apart and so was I.

Renée and Jazzy just hug me, unsure of how else to comfort me. No one knew that my dad was sick, besides me and my mom. I didn't want to tell anyone, but now I had no choice.

"M-My dad di-died this morning," I cry. I try to look at them, and even though my vision is blurry, I can tell they're both upset. "He's b-been sick for t-the past few m-months. I d-didn't want to tell y-you guys because I didn't w-want you guys to feel b-bad for me."

"You should have told us, Pippa. I'm so sorry," Renée says. I can tell by the way her voice shakes that she is crying with me.

"Pips, I'm so sorry," Jazzy whispered. She was also crying.

"Hey, are you three in here?" I hear a muffled voice say from the outside the door. I recognise it as Chris'.

"Chris, Lin, I think there's a problem," A second voice says. This time, it's Daveed who's talking. "Look."

I hear footsteps walk into the room.

"Girls?"

***

Lin POV

8:08 AM

I walk into the Schuyler Sisters dressing room to find all three girls hugging each other, crying.

"Girls?" I approach them slowly. I see Pippa's phone in her lap. Her home screen is showing, revealing her background as a picture of her and Steven on the day they got engaged. A thought immediately comes to my mind. "Phillipa, don't you dare tell me Steve called you again."

She shakes her head. What could possibly be causing Pippa, Renée, and Jazzy to cry?

"Uh, can one of you tell us what's wrong, please?" Daveed asks, giving me a questioning look. He mouths, "I'm so confused." I nod in agreement.

Pippa sniffs a few times, and then quickly says, "My dad died." She cries even harder now, and having the two people who always cheer her up crying next to her isn't helping. She brings her hands to her face. I hate seeing her so upset.

My jaw drops. "Pippa, I'm so sorry." I go over to her and I crouch down. Daveed and Chris also come over and say sorry as well. I don't know what else to do.

***

Pippa POV

8:10 AM

I feel a hand on my knee, and I move my hands away from my face to see Lin crouching down in front of me.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you guys," I say, sniffing a few more times. I was able to form more coherent sentences now because I actually wanted to talk to them. They probably had no idea what was going on. "I didn't know if you guys would care, either. Our lives are already really stressful...I didn't think you guys needed something else to worry about."

Lin takes my hands in his, and he squeezes it lightly. "Don't ever say that we wouldn't care. You know that isn't true." The guys are standing there awkwardly. Chris has a hand on Renée's shoulder, while Daveed has a hand on Jazzy's shoulder.

I give them all a small smile. Quickly, I frown again. I wasn't in the mood to be happy right now. They all notice my sudden mood changes, though, because Jazzy says, "Cheer up, Pips."

Obviously not the right word choice on her part, because this makes me sob even harder. Lin gives her a look that says, Really? He gets up and sits down next to me, both Renée and Jazzy move out of the way. He pulls me onto his lap, wrapping his arms around me, and my head leans against his chest. Lin's thumb lightly wipes the tears off my face and hugs me tighter, in an attempt to comfort me.

"Pips, everything is going to be okay." He tries with an empathetic smile, but it fails.

"You say that everytime, and my life just gets worse. Quit it already."

I push his chest, a little more roughly then I mean to, and pull out of his embrace. Everyone looks at me in disbelief as I storm out of the room, looking down at the ground. I walk to the stage and sit down in the middle of the turntable. I stare out at the empty audience chairs. All I wanted was some peace and quiet.

You see, I'm a reserved person, just like Eliza. Renée and Jazzy, however, aren't as reserved as me, like Angelica and Peggy. They never see me like this, and for some reason, it made me feel strange.

When I know I'm all alone, I start to cry again, this time, because of pure sadness, and a tinge of anger. I sit there for a few minutes until I hear footsteps coming from behind me. I hurriedly wipe away my tears so no one would notice I had been crying again.

"Lin, go away. I don't want to talk. To you, or to anyone," I hear the footsteps come closer to me. I don't move, suddenly afraid. I feel a hand touch my shoulder. It's a gentle hand, someone who doesn't want to hurt or harm me. I feel the person move to my right side and sit down beside me

"Hey Pippa," The person says quietly. I know that voice. It's a woman. She continues. "I know it's hard, losing someone you love. You've been through a lot in the past few weeks, which makes it even harder on you."

I look at the person. I'm staring into Renée's dark eyes. I don't say anything, I just lean my head against her shoulder. I feel very vulnerable now.

"I'm just so lost, Renée. I don't know what to do with myself anymore," I whisper, loudly enough so she can hear me. "I should just disappear. It's not like anyone would notice."

"Phillipa Soo, every person in the cast would notice. Everyone that steps foot in Richard Rodgers Theatre would notice. You light up every room you walk into. Do you not see that?" She takes her hand and gently turns my head towards her.

"But you're proving my point. Only the cast would notice? No one else?" I say the last sentence a bit sing-songy, like I would in Natasha, Pierre, and The Great Comet of 1812. I stifle a giggle, and I start to get up, remembering the conversation I was having, but Renée grabs my arm and pulls me lightly back down to the floor. 

"Phillipa, please, you understand my point, though, don't you? Each and every person in this theatre would notice your absence!" Renée pleads.

"Only the people in the theatre would notice? Not the whole world? Not my family, my other friends?" Renée stays silent at this. "Exactly. Point proven." I get up and walk off the stage, leaving Renée to sit alone in the dark.

thank you for reading! i posted super early today because the chapter was ready! sorry for any grammatical errors as always! chapter 9 will be up tomorrow!

adieu, jenna & alyssa :)