2020...

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I switch on my tv, I scroll through my phone-
I'm desperate right now to not feel alone.
When I'm alone my thoughts- they start to spiral...
I'll be sat dwelling on them for a while.
But the tv and my phone have no good news to bring,
Mainly they're dominated by one thing.
That one thing, that one word, I don't want to hear-
That one word that's been said non stop all year...
The virus. The pandemic. The quarantine.
That's all that seems to pop up on my screen.
If it's not that it's the climate crisis or political unrest-
So much to think about and... Oh, there's that feeling in my chest.
The feeling of panic spreading right through me,
I want it to stop but my eyes are glued to the TV.
When you have anxiety the world is already a terrifying place,
But with all that's happened this year that's even more the case.
There's too much noise, too many things being said,
Too much information I'm trying to process in my head.
I'm a passionate and caring person you see,
And I care a lot about the people and the world around me.
I try my best to make a difference and to take it all in,
But then it gets too much, it's all too overwhelming.
My brain likes to go at a mile a minute,
All these different thoughts swirling round and round in it.
This year has really put a strain on my health,
It's made it so hard for me to take care of myself.
I find myself in this state of surviving,
But I'm not really living life, certainly not thriving.
I'm picking up the pieces and trying to rebuild,
But with all that's going on I find I have no shield.
You can't shield yourself from it when all that's talked about,
So the anxiety will come creeping in with the worry and the doubt.
And right now you might be on your own,
But I promise you that you're not going through this alone.
It feels like right now we're so divided and more apart than ever,
But the only way we'll make it through this is if we do it together.

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