𝖳𝗁𝖾 𝖢𝗁𝗂𝗅𝖽 𝖮𝖿 𝖳𝗁𝖾 𝖯𝗅𝖺𝗇𝖾𝗍

18: It's not fair.

We were silent for most of the way up, until he decided to speak up.

"Do you... remember me?" he asked.

I felt my eyes widen at his sudden question. I was speechless at some point but I knew being honest with him would help us get closer.

"I do. That day.. is unforgettable." I smiled sadly.

He was about to say something but my vision interrupted me.

"Shinra troops on your left!" I shouted, interrupting him.

He instantly flung his sword on his left and pushed the troops away with a strong force.

I felt myself shiver at the sight of Shinra troops being after us. It made me become scared even if I knew I could beat them easily. 

Without noticing, I clung onto Cloud a lot tightly and buried my head into his broad back.

"Why are we going to Shinra building?.." I asked quietly but loudly enough for Cloud to hear it.

"I thought you knew. It's to put a bomb on a reactor." he said, confirming my worst fear.

Okay, this was still alright. I could manage to sneak past them without anyone noticing me here, but what if the information gets out and I'll be hunted down all the way home, endangering Aerith as well?

But then I saw it. The worst fear getting confirmed once again, this time knowing how bad it was.

"On your right." I said firmly which made Cloud's head whip to the right, seeing no one else than the Roche himself.

His devilish grin sent a shiver down my spine. 

"I love your style, however, these roads are mine." he said, grinning at Cloud.

But his eyes traced towards me, once he registered me, he gasped and then the evil smile spread over his face, "Jackpot..." he said in awe.

But before he could say anything else, Cloud swung his sword at him, scaring him away, making him drive ahead. The chase has just started. Cloud was focused at defeating him while I still couldn't get the grip of myself.

I got myself exposed. I was a threat to my own family now upon HIM seeing me.

"No freaking way, Yui Gainsborough right in front of my eyes. What a great day ahead of me." he bursted laughing maniacally. 

But Cloud interrupted him once again, this time getting more aggressive with him.

"Yui! Take the wheel for a bit!" Cloud commanded as he handed me the stirring wheel and jumped away to Roche's motorbike, damaging the engine. Cloud then jumped back, grabbed my hands and with ensuring safety, he put them around himself so I wouldn't fall off.

Roche's motorbike was a wreck now and he had no way of catching up with us. I felt Cloud's tension disappear at no signs of Roche now. I knew he wanted to ask me about it, but he chose to stay silent.

And with the silence becoming unbearable for me, I felt the guilt and shame surrounding my body. I couldn't finish this quest with them. If I would have known, I would never agree to it. I wouldn't have endangered me and Aerith like this.

"I can't do this... I'm sorry.." I said with a cracking voice.

But before he could say anything and turn at me, I stopped the time and with it, disappeared as if I haven't been with them since the start. 

In my visions, I saw he even stopped his motorbike while calling out my name. My disappearance was too sudden for him, but even if I felt bad, my priority was my family. Aerith.

My life.. it isn't fair. Nothing can go my way, I always have to sacrifice something in order to survive, or to protect. It's a trade, this life. 

On my way home, I felt my eyes water with tears. I was heartbroken.

It's strange, I was so determined this morning to never let things go, especially after trying to get to know more about Cloud, but look at me. My promise was nothing but an empty word with no deeper meaning. 

But I could live without Cloud. I couldn't live without Aerith. And I knew this fact for ultimately sure.

When I was nearing home, I put no effort into pretending I was okay. I was feeling at my lowest, because it hurt. 

So when I got home, Aerith came running to me with excitement at first, but she stopped upon seeing me with red puffy eyes. 

"What's wrong?" she asked so worriedly that it made my eyes water for the 100th time this day. 

Seeing her made me realize that she was SO important to me. No one could replace her and I knew my decision was right, no matter how bad I thought the pain was.

"Don't know.. I just got emotional on my way home and remembered some times that made me cry." I lied, laughing it off.

I hoped she believed it and for a second, I thought she had.

"Okay.. If you don't want to talk about it, I won't force you, but you are obliged to have this absolutely delicious cherry pie that you can't pass by just like this." she then put a plate with a cherry pie in front of me.

Her eyes were focused on me with a slight, yet sincere smile.

I chuckled at her effort of trying to make me happy, "I'd gladly have some." 

So once we sat down to eat the pies together, she looked at me and her gaze never left me since then.

"What?" I asked.

She frowned, "Do you really not want to tell me?"

"It's no that I don't want to, I just want to face this alone. It was my fault, so let me reflect on it." I said, "So... We are keeping secrets from each other from now on?" she asked, clearly "threatening" me emotionally.

She knew this was the key for me to tell her things that she wanted to hear.

"I'll tell you eventually, but not today. I promise." I said with a slight smile.

She smiled happily as she was now satisfied with my answer, "Okay!" .