The Last Song of Me

Chapter 36: Up We Go

AN: Hey guys. I have to apologize for my absense on Wattpad. I recently started noticing via email that this story has been getting a lot of attention lately and I feel bad that I never actually finished the story. I believe I was a junior or sophomore in high school when I first started this and now I'm a freshman in college, so I'm honestly in a different place now than I was then. But, because of you all, I'm determined to finish up this story and tie up loose ends before spring semester starts for me. I'm hoping it can live up to what it once was and if not, I'm sorry.

And, HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! 2015 is going to be great.

RECAP: “Alrighty guys, I will get you home as soon as possible…but first we have to make a quick stop.” My dad said as he reversed out of the parking spot.

            “Ok, where are we going?”I asked curiously and tired. Did I mention tired?

            “You’ll see…” My dad replied suspiciously. Something tells me that this is going to be a long day.

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He got onto the highway and I felt the car weaving in and out of traffic and the beep of car horns as a man sticks up a middle finger in disgust. I tried to hold down my last meal as my dad's determined and unfazed face is focused on the road. He broke the silence in the vehicle.

        "We have to get there before the sun goes down."

        "Where?" I questioned as I looked at Logan who's face summarized my confusion. He shrugged and my dad brushed off my question with a passive answer.

        "You'll see."

I hated those two words because it meant that I had no control over the situation and it meant that he was either uncertain or was very sure. Both extremes were always dangerous when it came to him.

We drove another what felt like forty minutes, although I was preoccupied by tumblr and all of the pointless yet relatable things that plagued my dashboard. We ended up at one of my favorite spots on the beach. It was one of the local beaches, but this was one of the sides that no one ever ventured to because of its spot far from the pier, restaurants, shops and bars. I saw the reflection of the sun as it hit the clear, blue-green water. This was one of my most favorite places because it was somewhere my mom took me once a month, where we talked and I played guitar and wrote.

Logan, Nicki and I took off our shoes and I rolled up my slightly ripped blue jeans. My dad was still digging around in the car trying to find something it appeared that he stowed underneath a seat. I heard footsteps behind me and turned around to find my dad holding a ceramic urn. His eyes weren't sad but proud. Logan and Nicki at this point were kicking around the water near the low tide line.

        "Why today? Why now?" I asked him with slight confusion across my face.

        "I don't know." He paced a little bit and tried to collect his thoughts. "I just thought... you're happy Sam. You're the happiest I've seen you in awhile and I dunno, I just thought that this would be a good time. Your aunt is here, your best friend, Logan, Me... and more importantly, you're here." 

        "Well, I mean duh, I'm here." I laughed and he smiled.

        "No, I mean, you're here." He gestured his hands to show his surroundings and then head. "You're actually here and present and in the moment and that's what has been missing since your mom got sick." He said with sincerity in his voice.

I've never heard him speak like that before, but he was right. I lost myself for a long time, I tried to play the card where I was strong and nothing could tear me down. I slapped on a fake smile and pretended to be happy. I wasn't but I am now.

        "But, Luke's not here..." I said and kind of trailed off.

        "Yeah, I know. He said that this was your spot. He chose somewhere else already and was able to spread some of her ashes already there, so today's about you."

        "Uh, okay." I shook my head and smiled at the thought process of what is Logan. He's such a loser, but he's my loser and I love him for that. Our conversation went silent for a little bit and then I spoke up again. "Thanks dad, seriously. Thank you."

        "You're welcome honey." he said as he gave me a hug. "Also, both Nicki and Logan were in on this." I looked at him and he gave me a smirk I hadnt seen on him in months.

        "Of course they were." They turned around at the mention of their names and both of them gave me big smiles and superfluous waves before I ran over to them. "I'm gonna kill you both!!!" I yelled and they started running along the beach. I caught up to Logan and jumped on him. Without hesitation he flipped me over and dropped me into the water. I looked at him and he was laughing. I was smiling but kept eye contact with him.

        "I love you Sam." he said through his deep laugh.

        "I love you too."

        "Ewwww, get a room!" Nicki interrupted, fake disgust in her voice.

        "Come on guys, get over here." My dad held up the urn and we ran back up the beach a bit.

I took some of the ashes from inside of the urn and walked down closer to the water. I raised my arm up and felt the wind blowing my hair. Ever so slowly I opened up my hand and watched as the powder flew from my hand, caught in the air and then away at last. I closed my eyes and felt an arm go around me.

Yeah. I was here. I was present and this defintely was not the last of me. It was a beginning; it was a life that I found worth living again.

Someone once told me that, sometimes the best people don't last forever. But, that doesn't mean that they weren't the best.

"It's been a long year, and I only know from down this low. It's only up we go."

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AN: And this is a wrap! I know it's short, but I feel like this is the best way to end this. Thank you all once again for making it this far with me :)