Sword and Shield (GxG)

Chapter Seventeen : The Once Virago : Evangaline

In all the time since I'd been allowed to leave RIkhata I had been limiting our interaction. She is hurting, I know, and being close to her is testing me. I cant help her because she could mistake it, I cant see her this... Empty because I would need to help her. And either of those would end up causing us both more trouble. The alternitive is not seeing her. She may think I've abandoned her but she is in her room almost all the time... So I dont really have any choice. 

Someone knocks on my door. I'm laying in bed, as it is nearly ten o'clock, and dressed in very little. 

"Who is it?" I muttered. 

"Rikhata" the person behind the door answered. "Sorry if I woke you" 

"I was already awake"

"Do you mind if I come in?" 

"Uh.... No" I said shyly, pulling the covers up to my neck. Rikhata pushed open the door, the darkness of my room now lit by the candle she was holding. 

"I... Wanted to appoligize for being distant. I know war is coming soon, and I was too quick to shut out the world when I need people to fight on my side" she gave me a smile, her beautiful features pronounced by the dim glow of the candle. Sharp cheeks that cast shadows over her face, bright blue eyes to contrast the golden luminecence of fire, and hazel hair that reflected the candle's light. She was... I dont have a word for her. My eyes settled on her lips and refused to leave.

"Thanks...." I whispered absentmindedly. Thunder cracked suddenly outside. Rikhata jumped, and I cowered under my sheets. I know I shouldnt be afraid of a storm, but I know thunder isnt the only thing that roars like that. Another boom caused me to let out a squeal. I could hear Rikhata purring with amusment.

"Its just a storm"  she mused. I heard her walking and let my head out of the protective blanket, finding her closing my windows. "Nothing to worry about. The sky was treatening a storm all day. Suppose it just decided to come now" she laughed. 

"Glad you enjoy this..." I grumbled. I've seen and heard dragon attacks before. The dragons sound like a storm from afar, then they sound more like a beast as they close in. Thats why I was shivering with fear. I was just waiting for the pouring rain to turn into the hiss of fire. 

"I should go. Its late and the North could always attack tomorrow" Rikhata turned to leave. 

"Dont leave" I said. The light of her candle was turned away from me, so all I saw was darkness. "I-I-nevermind... I can live through a storm..." I rolled away from her, trying to forget her gorgeous face and magnetic lips. 

"Its fine. I cant sleep with Akyra snoring anyway" Rikhata sighed and sat down on a sofa on the side of the room reverse me. I wanted to tell her she didnt have to sleep over there, but it would sound different if I asked her.... Granted I did want her closer, but I'd be able to contain myself enough to let her sleep comfortably. 

Rikhata set her candle on the floor. I watched her until it was almost dead, not once did she turn to me. When she finally did her eyes were open and awake. My face and cheeks grew hot with embarassment.

"How long have you been watching me?" She whispered, though not sleepily.

"Since you put the candle down" I admited, "sorry... I'll stop... Though you look uncomfortable... You could.... Nevermind" I scolded myself for even saying that much. Rikhata smiled, then laughed. I turned red from embarassment. 

"To think only weeks ago I was, to you, a demon, and you had your mind set on hating me"  she mused. I lowered my gaze. She had lost so much recently, and that just made my former disgust that much more painful. Even if it wasnt to Rikhata it was to me. "You've changed a lot"

"So what if I have? I still acted that way in the past and it is still wrong" I muttered under my breath. I was, am, and will continue to be extremely mad at myself for behaving like that to Rikhata. 

"The fact you're grumbling to yourself proves my point" Rikhata purred. "Good night, Princess" she said before she rolled over, turning her back to me, and falling asleep.

"Good night, Wildling" Rikhata shivered for no apparent reason, but I passed it off as a mere trick in my eyes.

I had almost fallen asleep when my mother barged into the room.

"Evangaline, Rikhata, the castle is under attack from a what has been predicted as a small band of Westerners" she said hurriedly. "Stay here until I or a Guardian tells you otherwise" she rushed and left. Rikhata got up and locked the door. I am in a room with Rikhata... Maybe all night... And tomorrow too... I regestered with mixed oppinions. Rikhata went back to her couch, trying to find a comfortable position.

"You dont have to sleep on the couch, you know" I blurted. Rikhata froze and looked at me with a stone face. I knew my face was glowing red, as I wished I could take back my words while they hung like a gillutine above my head. 

"Are you asking me to sleep with-"

"No! Not at all!" I choked at Rikhata's reply, cutting her off unintentionally.  "I-I-you looked uncomfortable... Nevermind... You can take some sheets or pillows from that closet..." I pointed to a set of doors in the corner of my room. 

"I'm fine" she insisted. "I know what you did back when I was coming itnto conciousness a few weeks ago. I hope you understand that I am not ready to consider envolving myself with anyone at the moment. I dont know if or when I will ever be able to. I dont want you to think I am just not interested in you. I'm just...." Rikhata murmured.

"I understand. I didnt mean for you to think I was trying to push you into a relationship" I nodded "I hope it doesnt change whatever friendship or mutuality we had"

"It wont. I will be honest, Evangaline, I may be able to like you when things settle. Not now, maybe not soon, maybe not ever, but maybe, when I am ready... I'm sorry if I raise your hopes too high" again Rikhata caused me a flood of contrasting emotions.

"I dont expect what isnt sure" I shook my head and fell asleep, dreaming of what fantasies I held. But heaven knows they're nothing but fantasies. To be free from the burden of appealing to a kinggdom that will be mine, to have no regrets in my judgments of people who had been different from me, to call the woman who had been so strong, the once virago, mine.