Sword and Shield (GxG)

Chapter Nine : The Affliction : Evangaline

The last day was chaotic. This morning is sad. This week is shaping up to be one of a kind, now that Rikhata's ex is in power. So there is the good news. What is the bad news? Well I-

"This is war" my mother muttered, removing me from my thoughts. "She killed an Eastern woman,  fled from her crime, and now the North is having her as queen?!" Rikhata looked a terrifying mixture of grief and rage, like she was knew she had nothing to lose, and her anger made her that much more dangerous to both others and herself. 

"I'm sorry..." I whispered to her. With all my hate drained away all that remained is the curse she had on me. The curse that made my eyes unable to escape the sight of her, nor ears her voice, nose her scent, nor the ghost of her absent touch on my skin, or the desire to know her taste. The bad news: I feel more for Rikhata than I have to anyone or thing before in my life.

"Truely. Why dont you go back to your room? I relieve you of any and all duties for the day" My mother put a hand on Rikhata's shoulder. She nodded and walked away, her dragon trailing at her side. I looked back at my mother, who gave me a faint smile and gestured for me to follow her. I tried to be as quiet as I could following Rihkata, I dont know how she'd react to my being here.

"Does your mother not trust me to find my way back?" She stopped, and I did too. "I can hear you" she turned around and I was standing in her plain view. 

"I-I-she does. I just needed to make sure you werent going to do something irrational" I muttered, suddenly defensive. "You are a Guardian, I cannot allow you to die" 

"Good to know someone cares about me" she hissed sarcasticaly. "I'm not going to kill myself. Just leave me alone" I lowered my gaze at her deadly tone.

"Okay..." I slowly wwaled back to my room, distracting myself with the sound of my footsteps to keep back my tears. She shouldnt have had this happen to her, and she thinks she is alone... I guess she is... Do I want to change that? Yes. Does that scare me? Yes. Does the fact that it has me shaking with terror that I want to spend my life with her, a girl, who I just met, who doesnt like me, who I was so bad to, who I cant stop from breaking any defence I have against others - does it even cast a glimmer of doubt on my desires? No. She had me hanging from a noose, and if she let me free I'd fall into the abyss below. A place I cant see down to the bottom. I'd fall forever unless she caught me. But would she? Would she even cut me from where I am to be hung? I dont know... If she ever felt anything to me she sure has a strange way of showing it.

Is she thinking about me now? Is she sitting on her bed, speaking with the dragon in that odd language, asking the dragon if she thinks that I like her? Does she wonder if she can one day gather the courage to ask me how I feel? Of course not. She is too strong to be that weak. Does she wonder if she'll miss the chance to have me, and does she wonder if one day I will fall for someone that isnt her? Does it break her heart? No. Stupid Evangaline. She loved Lilian and not you. She cannot love you after what you have done to her. She cannot love you after what Lilian did to her. I plunged myself into the cold water of reality. But I have a chance, right? I whispered, now in my room, falling onto my bed. Why did it seem so much colder now that Rikhata was here? So much bigger and so alone. Of course she'd never fill it. Why do I have to be cursed like this? To feel so strongly with no escape, and no way to show Rikhata that I am sorry, and that if she'd let me I'd give her the love Lilian never did. 

I allowed myself to drift into a deep sleep, though there were no pleasant dreams awaiting me.

**Heeeey! So this is short but I think its pretty deep and stuff. Made me, for one, think of Eve differently. Its kinda funny, when you're writing: you cant change your characters, only the story you make can change them, and the thing with Lil really did give me a new view for our formerly flat character that is Evangaline