~Naruto Fanfic~ What is wrong with these freaks from Hell *cough* I mean Konoha

I scream rape and no one comes to help

****I......DON"T.......OWN.......................a hamster (-_-) oh, and NARUTO, obviously. Here's the 3rd chapter(*whisper*I'm telling you just in case you can't count past 2*whisper*) Hope you like it or at least mildly tolerate it. Ha ha. Photo on the side is Akemi****

~This chapter is now dedicated to KJStarLace because she's just that awesome~

"RAPE!!! HELP! I'M  ABOUT TO BE RAPED BY A PIRATE!!! SOMEONE? SERIOUSLY,  I'M GOING TO BE RAPED IN SOME RANDOM SHED WHERE NO ONE WILL SEE ME!! HELP!!!" I kept screaming that halfway through the village but everyone gave ME the weird look not the pirate carrying me like a  rabbit off to the slaughter house. Geez, you would think any normal people would come and help a young girl being carried off by a strange man yelling she's about to be raped. My 1st impression of this village is not turning out so great if they can't help a girl in need. You know what *gasp* I bet people are being raped all the time, that's why no ones helping me. What a horrible village this place is turning out to be. As soon as Pirate man brings me to this 'Hokage' I'm going to be complaining to him about his village's situation. I still have no idea what this 'Hokage' is but it probably is the person in charge. "RAPE!!" I tried again.

"Stop screaming that, no one is going to help and I'm not raping you so quit saying so." Pirate turned to say. He started to adjust me while carrying me. ~Ooh, that hurt. Damn, stupid wound. Why did you have to reopen? It can't be that hard to stay closed after almost being ripped apart.~ I grunted. I had a load of bandages wrapped around my stomach and the blood hasn't leaked through yet, so Pirate doesn't know I'm bleeding on his shoulder. He turned one final corner and came into a large red building. He became silent. "Now if I put you down gently, will you try to run off?"

I closed my eyes and breathed slowly, I opened them again and smiled as sweetly as I could, "Why of course I won't run. Where would I run to?" He just stared at me and sighed. He started putting me down and as soon as my feet touched the ground I tried to bolt away. Emphasis on tried Pirate man knew and grabbed my shirt collar and held tightly, effectively holding me back to him. "Damn you, Pirate, why won't you just leave me alone."

"Because it's my job to bring any intruders to the Hokage and would you please stop calling me 'Pirate' or 'Pirate-man'?"

"No, it suits you."

"It also annoys me."

"Exactly." He sighed again. He started dragging me towards a door near the top of the building. Do you know how hard it is to go up a flight of stairs dragging a girl 3/4 of your height? Well Pirate does now. I almost got him to fall backwards and let go of his grip on me but it just ended up with him falling on me. When we got to the door we were both scratched and slightly bruised from falling and fighting up the stairs to the 'Hokage's' door. Pirate knocked and come in was heard. Pirate pushed open the door and still dragged me inside the room unwillingly. There I saw an old, old man sitting there doing paperwork and he had a really weird hat on. A bunch of adults in other weird clothes were gathered around him, yoga man was there too. They looked like they were in the middle of a meeting. What is with these people and their weird fashion senses? "Hokage-sama, I've brought the intruder from the borders that you had us check out." They all turned to get a look at me. They took in Pirate and my scuffed up appearance and looked at us oddly, finally grandpa broke the silence.

"Thank you, Kakashi, I-"

"WAIT!! You're the idiot that made those freaks chase me halfway across that freakin' forest!? What is wrong  with you people!?" I went to go smack some sense into the old man, who was looking at me in shock. The others were too. Seriously what is with these people? It's not like I do that many surprising things. But Pirate man suddenly bonked me on the head. Hard. "Ow,what the hell was that for?"