Chapter 30: Consequences

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I couldn't move, couldn't talk, and couldn't feel anything. Was this my body refusing to deal with what happened? Was this my punishment for killing Owen?

A small part of me knew that I hadn't killed him, not directly. But if I hadn't tried to escape, then he would still be alive.

I tried to lift a finger but there was no result, apart from an unpleasant sensation in my side.

"I think she's waking up." An unfamiliar voice echoed around me.

"Well we are not finished yet, give her more."

I began to panic. What are they doing to me? What's going on? I felt so tired.... No, stay awake Hayden! I couldn't see anything. No wait..... White hair, stained with blood and wide, staring eyes.

I couldn't move. I couldn't do anything. I didn't want to see this.

The image changed to pitch black, then a pair of burning red eyes appeared out of the dark.

What's happening to me?! I tried to cry out but I was powerless.

Suddenly everything went black. I could see nothing. Then a voice.

"Hello Hayden."

I tried to shut it out. I was going crazy. Leave me alone!

"Hayden we have not got much time. You will be waking up soon. You need to listen to me."

It must be my subconscious. Did that happen?

"Hayden. Right now I'm trying to block you away from yourself. What happened to you is tearing you apart. I'm a part of you. You have to trust me. Let me in. I can help." They seemed to become more and more desperate.

I couldn't do anything, and the voice disappeared.

***

I peeled open my eyelids and stared at the white ceiling. I wasn't in a cell, which removed my immediate fears. But where was I? I turned my head to the side and found myself staring at a bedside table. It wasn't the room I had. Everything was strangely white. My eyes finally focused more and I noticed that there were rows of beds. A hospital? Angeline wouldn't allow anything public. So I was still in the mansion?

"You're awake."

I twisted my head to face a familiar figure. Jason. Anger filled me, like none that I had felt before as I remembered him throwing Owen across the ballroom all those weeks ago. I stared up at the ceiling and he moved closer. He wore a plain button up white shirt and as he sat on my bed he patted my knee.

I tugged away, trying to get him to stop but then I noticed that my arms and legs were restrained to the bed.

"Get... These off me." My voice was croaky, like I hadn't used it in days but it must have only been a few hours at least. I yanked again and he sighed.

"Take it easy. You won't be feeling yourself for a few hours. They pumped you full of the poison again."

I banged my head down on the pillow again, hard, and stared up at the ceiling. He must have been able to feel my mood because he shifted uneasily.

"Hayden, I know this isn't the time.... But you should have waited."

"Shut up." I turned away, tears threatening to fall but I would not cry. I would not. I was done with crying. I was done with everything.

"Hayden.... I had a plan. Owen-"

"I said shut the hell up. I never want to hear that name again." I closed my eyes but when my vision returned to that night I opened them.

After a few minutes I felt the restraints loosen and I looked down. Jason undid them and stood back warily.

I swung my legs out and then swore as my side burned. The arrowhead. I looked up at the hybrid and he frowned disapprovingly. "You shouldn't have done that."

I nearly attacked him when he said that but I stopped when I realized that he wasn't talking about the escape attempt. His eyes were glued to a bandage around my middle.

"They had to operate on you to get that out. It took hours."

I sat on the edge of the bed, trying to get up the courage to put weight on my wound. I hissed and held onto the area around the wound. He moved forward to help but I waved him away with a grimace.

I made the bed, I was going to sleep in it.

I stood but as soon as gravity had it's say I tumbled.

Jason was there in an instant, holding me up. I pushed him away angrily and paid the price when I fell to the ground. He stood back and I heard him give a small snarl.

"Don't touch me." I grabbed hold of the bars on the bed and hauled myself up.

"I heard about how you lost control."

I stared at him. "What?"

He leaned on the wall. Still clearly pissed about being shoved away. "You lost control, very nearly shifted for your first time."

Despite myself the shock showed on my face. Then I remembered. The rage and grief... It must have triggered something.

"You knew."

He raised an eyebrow, giving the impression that he didn't know what I was talking about.

"You knew that I was a werewolf. Didn't you? You must have. All that time training me. And you must have sensed it." I could feel the reproach in my gaze.

He sighed. "I knew. But it was only when I saw the scar on your arm that I was certain."

"You didn't think that I might want to know about it?"

He shrugged and I sat on the bed in frustration. "Why are you still here?"

"Angeline was going to insist that I leave. But I managed to change her mind by pointing out that you are a new werewolf and I'm part werewolf. So I can help keep you under control."

"So you're basically here as my babysitter?"

"Pretty much."

"And why are you here? As in, in this room right now?"

He ignored the accusation in my tone. "To deliver a message, and... To make sure you were okay."

I equally ignored part of what he said. "What message?"

"Angeline said-" he passed over the slight noise of anger that escaped me and continued. "She said to tell you that you've been invited to a dinner with her family."

"Invited?"

"Yeah no.... It's more like an order."

"What do they want me there for?" I spotted some clothes on the table and limped over, thankful to be rid of the hospital gown.

"Probably..." He paused like he wasn't sure whether to tell me, "to decide what your punishment is going to be."

I paused in my action of grabbing the clothes and bit my lip. "Okay."

Jason looked as though he wanted to say something else but he just turned to the door. "Get dressed. I'll come get you when it's time. You're not aloud to leave this room."

I watched him go and when he closed the door, lifted the hospital gown above my head, slipping on the more appropriate wear. A white shirt and blue jeans. My breathing increased as I began to panic again. I lost my chance. And because it failed someone died and I was about to also face the consequences. I sat on the bed and put my head in my hands. He had been here for five years. He deserved to make it back to the outside world.

It should have been me.


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