The Destitute Queen || h.s. au

51. Harry

A/N: Might wanna get your tissues ready...

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     Five days. It's been five days since I last saw Lena, five days since I last felt my heartbeat. I'm starting to wonder if I'm even alive.

     I don't even know how those five days passed by. Honestly, I don't remember much of it. All I can remember are the sleepless nights and the tasteless food. When I look in the mirror, I don't even see myself anymore. The person looking back at me is a sickly pale skeleton. I can't even see the color in my eyes anymore.

     Edrokar has always been bleak and dreary, but it seems especially grey outside. It's not like I care, it's just an observation. Everything seems darker, somehow.

     I hear the clock strike eight, and I sigh. I pull the blanket up to my shoulders and shiver, not exactly enjoying the cold breeze coming through the open balcony door. Wait, why is the door open?

     Slowly sitting up, I rub my eyes and let out a tired yawn. Frowning, I pry my eyes open and look towards the balcony. The door is wide open, causing the cold winter wind to flow in. I notice two small sheets of paper by my bedside, and I furrow my brows. Before I can reach them, however, the wind gushes in and moves one of them to the ground and towards the door. Groaning, I get up and slowly walk up to the door.

     I bend down to reach the paper, but the wind blows it out of my grasp once again. I try to reach for it, but the wind is too strong. Ignoring the freezing cold porcelain floor underneath my feet, I frown as I see the slip of paper being taken away, out of my reach. It flies far away, until I can barely see it. The paper must have fallen into the garden or something. I wonder what it said.

     Deciding to go back into my room, I close the balcony door and turn my attention to the other piece of paper. This one was a much more expensive-looking parchment. I walk to my nightstand and get back under the covers of my warm bed, grabbing the parchment. It reads:

     Enough is enough. You will join your family for breakfast and that is final. I have had more than enough of your attitude, and my patience is wearing thin. Do not be a disappointment, Harry.

     Your Father

     I sigh, wondering how he even got this letter in my bedroom in the first place. It frightens me that someone must have been in my room while I was asleep.

     I suddenly remember that today is the first day of the new year, and that I missed the celebration last night. It doesn't matter, though. It's just another day.

     Placing the parchment back onto the short nightstand, I turn to my side and close my eyes. When I open them, I'm surprised by the beautiful vision of Lena sleeping soundly beside me. I blink a few times, and the vision is gone.

     This is worse than hell. Not only do I have to live with the fact that she'll never love me, my mind has to make it more painful by showing me visions that I know will never happen.

     I will never wake up in the morning with her by my side, having the honor of reveling in the presence of my sleeping angel. I'll never be able to hold her close when I can't sleep, or comfort her if she ever has a nightmare. I will never know what it feels like to give her a proper kiss to wake her up when we've slept too much. To see her in a peaceful sleeping state, with her long hair all over the place and her steady breaths, is something I wish for more than anything.

     I've got to stop thinking about things like that, it's only torturing me even more. I don't think my heart can take all of this, it feels as though it's going to give out any minute.