Well Fuck

Part 11: Too Casual for This

-Three Months later-

The graduation ceremony is this week. I could hardly believe that I had gone through four years of art school.
I already have a company called Arttusion lined up for me to start my permanent job. I got the position of creating album art for musicians. They took a tour of our school and spotted several students they wanted for their company and I was one. Yes sir, I am confident about where my life is going!

Dexter and I have only gone out a couple more times since that night and it was only to get coffee or lunch. I'm disappointed that we haven't seen eachother as much. At one point, I thought he was interested in me romantically. But, given the situation, I assume he just wants to be friends.

I'm sitting in my apartment watching a movie with Pluto in my lap, when I'm startled by my phone vibrating on the metal end table next to my couch. I peer at the screen, it's Kim. Subconsciously, I know I wanted to see Dex❤ pop up.
I open the message: Did you get your tickets yet? I look up from my phone, puzzled. Oh, the dance. I reply: no.
For all the college seniors, there is a formal party the weekend after the ceremony.
I never really planned on going. I don't like dressing up at all. I never wear makeup in general, why would why would I want to for a dance? Plus, finding a dress in my size is a living hell. They all either look like "Mother of the Bride" dresses or they are just down right ugly! 

She replies: why not?!

because I'm not going

😑

I ignore her and watch the rest of my movie.

*****

I fidget in the hard, metal fold out chair. The ceremony is taking place in the park across the street from the school. It's April and it's already starting to warm up outside, so this black, scratchy robe is extremely uncomfortable.
My name is finally called, and I get up to accept my major in visual arts. It feels good to say it, I feel distinguished!
I skim the crowd, looking for people I knew. I saw Kim in her seat flailing her arms to get my attention. I shake my head in a laugh and wave back at her. I even see Chico towards the back separate from all the parents, nodding toward me as I wave.
I don't see Dexter. He had told me that he would come see me accept my major even though he wasn't going himself. Since he came into the school so late, it was mostly just for fun for him.
I hold back a frown as I shake Mr. B's hand, smile, and mouth a Thank you through the applause and chatter.

*****

After all the agonizing photography from my parents and Kim's parents, we all head out to dinner.
Kim's mom had already reserved a party table in the private room of a fancy Italian restaurant for us.
Chico tags along too; we are all pretty much considered family.

*****

Once all of our small talk comes to an end and we've gotten all our hugs, kisses, and congratulatory remarks, we go our separate ways and head home. Kim is drunk, so Chico agrees to take her home since he carpooled here. I had drunk quite a bit myself, but unlike Kim's parents, mine didn't allow me to get drunk. I drive home anyway.
I stumble up to my blue door, dragging my black robe behind me. I am completely exausted, and somewhat disappointed. I guess Dexter coming meant a lot more to me than I thought.
I drop everything at the door and head straight to the shower. I let the hot water run over my head, before I knew it, tears ran down my face along with the water. I hadn't talked to Dexter in over two weeks and he has not said a word either. He doesn't care anymore, he never did.
More tears came down and I let out a small sob.
After I get into my polyester pajama pants and worn out t-shirt, I plop onto my couch. I snuggle up into my throw blanket, turn on Adult Swim, and try to distract myself.

I start to doze when I hear a soft panicked knock at my door. I didn't buzz anyone up, damn it's late. I climb out of my blanket and slowly make my way to the door. I tip-toe to look through the peep hole, then I realize it's too dark to see.
I hesitantly open the door.

"Juno, I'm so glad you're awake!"

It took me a minute to recognize the tall dark figure in my doorway. I made out the reflection of a leather jacket with what little light shone on it.

"Dexter?! Wh-what are you doing here?"

"Could I come in? I'll explain everything!"

I open the door wider and gesture him to come in. I can't help but feel an underlying frustration towards him. He steps passed me and I close the door. I turn on a light and before I can turn to face him, he takes me into his arms.

"Juno, I am so sorry about these past two weeks, hell, these past three months, you have no idea how bad I feel! I went out of town to visit my parents and my phone was shot, I couldn't get it to work. But before that, I had no excuse not to make more time for you. I'll be honest, that night we spent together in January was the most fun I've had in years. I want more nights like those! I really enjoy your company, Juno. I just haven't done my best to show that and I'm sorry."

Him hugging me this whole time, I feel all the tension release in my body. I almost feel the heat of tears again when I look up to face those olive eyes of his.

"Dexter, I-"

He takes one look at my face and his forehead wrinkles with concern.

"Have you been crying?"

I look down, embarassed. I'm assuming he's out of options for affection because he grabs the sides of my head and places a light peck on my forehead.

"I am so sorry, Juno, I didn't mean to hurt you!"

He hugs me even tighter this time.

"I'm just glad to hear you weren't ignoring me on purpose!"

"Hell no! Are you kidding me? I'd have to be a complete ass to do that!"

I giggled behind a few tears of relief.

"I'll tell you what, can I make it up to you? I actually had something else to ask you about."

"Sure!"

"Would you wanna go to that dance this weekend with me?"

I paused, I had just realized how much we sound like a couple and not two friends who had only met three months ago. I'm not going to bring it up though, I'm going to go along with it. I'll see what happens!

"Really? You wanna go with me?"

"Of course I do! It might be a little formal for us, but it's about time I ask you on a real date!"

"A date?"

My cheeks turn beat red again. It was for sure we weren't just friends anymore. He is interested in me romantically!

"Is that ok?"

"Yeah, that's ok!"

I gazed up at him with a dreamy smile and he returned it.