I Cried For All We'd Never Be

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Jamie’s P.O.V

So here I am, getting ready once more because Andy decided to ask me on another date. I put on my distressed black jeans along with a black tank top and blue and red dinosaur hoodie. To complete the look I added red converse and a couple of wrist bands to hide my cuts. I haven’t cut in a while but I’m starting to get the urge again and I don’t think Andy knows about the scars.

There was a knock on the door just as I finished my eyeliner and Andy appeared in the door way smiling at me. I smiled back and followed him out the door.

It was already noon and the sun was already making its decent. We walked across the streets of LA for about a half hour and by that time the sun was just touching the horizon. We walked to a black checker blanket laid out among the daisy’s that littered the field. A traditional picnic basket was placed in one corner and many blankets littered the checker material.

I gasped at how pretty it was and secretly vowed I wouldn’t mess this date up. Andy took my hand and led me to the picnic motioning for me to sit down. As I did so he picked up the basket and allowed the blankets to replace it as he sat down.

Opening the basket, a smell like no other met my nose. We sat in silence as we ate and watched the sun disappear being replaced by the moon. When we finished and the only light was the reflection of the orb in the sky we settled down covered in blankets to gaze at the stars.

We laid there for a while just staying silent huddled next to each other. It wasn’t an awkward silence or anything it was comfortable a time to take in our surroundings. Even though we were silent I was still experiencing butterflies in my stomach. A petit smile was sketched on my face as he brought me closer to him.

He sighed in content and I couldn’t help but want to be honest about everything that’s happened to me. A tear escaped my eye as I closed them. We did clear a lot up as to why I ran off, last night but there was more about my life story. I might write a letter to him. Sounds stupid right? Andy shifted from below me and brought himself up on his elbow cupping me face with his other hand.

‘Are you okay?’ Andy asked softly, worry painted on his porcelain face.

‘I just…I don’t know Andy. I really don’t know what’s wrong with me.’ I confessed sticking with the letter idea. He smiled at me and I couldn’t help but smile back at him. I just wanted everything to be perfect between us but there was always some sort of problem. And now that the tour has ended and we will be flying back tomorrow my dad will find me. It actually a surprise he isn’t here in LA and followed me. Let’s just hope that not true.

I closed my eyes and sighed in content. When I get back home I will have to face everything. School, what are they going to say. They probably already know I was in a coma but do they know I’m on tour with the guys? Will they have to phone my dad or something about it? What if they already have?

Ill also have to go back to all the torments and shit that happens inside the hell hole. No doubt Zoe has told everyone about me and Andy and everything else that’s happened. What of Andy starts to get bullied because he doesn’t have Zoë’s word that she won’t. If that makes sense at all. I just don’t want their life to change because I was so messed up.

What if they blame me and don’t speak to me ever again.

I felt warm as the sun engulfed my tired frame. The wind blew by softly as the day passed on. I opened my eyes to Andy staring down at me. Seriously what is it with Andy looking at me as I sleep? Okay I’ve got to admit it’s kind of cute. I smiled at him as he held me in his arms. Wait what! He’s carrying me. Why is he carrying me?! I heard the familiar shout of the five other people in my life (five including Sammi) and assumed he was taking me out the car as I had probably slept through the car ride back which I can’t even remember there being one, but then again I was asleep so...

The warm air from inside covered me like a blanket inviting me in to the bus. I looked around to see the guys all running around packing up their stuff and Sammi sitting there reading the latest Kerrang! The bus began to move. I guessed the bus driver was waiting for Andy and me. I looked at Andy and I’m guessing I must have a sad look on my face because Andy led me to the bedroom. Not like that you dirty minded peoples!

We sat on the crimson sheets staring into each other’s eyes before Andy finally asked ‘what’s wrong?’

‘What’s going to happen to me?’ I answered truthfully ‘my dad’s on the lookout for me and if he finds me I will be dead meat. I’m going to get bullied and tortured in school again and I have nowhere to go! M life is ruined I should have never left my dad…’

‘Don’t you dare say that! If you didn’t leave you could be dead right now! And I will be with you twenty four seven so if your dad finds you I can protect you. As for the ‘nowhere to go’ part, you can move into our place. My mams bought us all a new place to live when I told her I met you! We can all be one big happy family! You, me, Sammi and the guys! It gonna be great.’

I looked into his eyes, grateful for everything he has done and hugged him. This is going to be the best year of my life!

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