Monachopsis
n. the subtle but persistent feeling of being out of place, as maladapted to your surroundings as a seal on a beach.
-lumbering, clumsy, easily distracted, unable to recognize the ambient roar of your intended habitat, in which you'd be...
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Third person
"You still up?" Ramsey asked as she walked into her bedroom.
"Yeah I couldn't go to sleep while you were out." Aubrey said as he rubbed his tired eyes. It had reach the hour of one in the morning and she was just now coming in from a night with Tyree. It was an innocent evening full of nothing but catching up. "Did you have a good time?" Aubrey asked sitting up.
"I did actually, I went out with Tyree." For a split second he thought his heart stopped. "Calm down, we were just hanging out at some restaurant, we hadn't seen each other in years." Ramsey took off her shirt and made an attempt to pull down her leggings down.
"I can't wait to push this baby out so I touch my damn toes again." She made an attempt again but couldn't get them past her knees. "Here let me help." Aubrey got up from the bed and grabbed the waistband and pulled them down gently. Ramsey stepped out of them cautiously as he got them down to her ankles. They locked eyes as he stood up. "Thank you." Ramsey walked away quickly to the bathroom to take a shower to avoid the awkward stare.
He sat on the decorative bench at the foot of the bed and waited for her to get out.
Wait what are you doing nigga? You better go hop in there with her. Aubrey shook his head at his own thoughts. The doctor said it's okay for you to slide in so go do it!
"Nah I'm not about to do that." He stood up and threw her clothes in the hamper. The black and white ultrasound of his daughter caught his eye as he walked passed Ramsey's dresser. "Look at my baby." He held the picture and sat on the edge of the bed. "I'm really about to have a daughter." He rubbed his thumb over the blurry imagine of her face.
Just a few years ago if you would've told Aubrey by 30 he'd have two kids he'd probably laugh in your face. He loved children but could never see himself having his own. Getting a vasectomy crossed his mind several times after those multiple slip ups he had in the past. He even spoke to his father about it, and of course all Dennis did was tell him getting a Vasectomy would make him less of a man. Aubrey knew it wasn't true but it did give him doubts about the procedure. Maybe it was God's will that his father said that to him because of he would've gotten the surgery his daughter wouldn't be on the way, maybe Amir wouldn't be born. And if Ramsey would've never gotten pregnant there was a twenty out of ten chance she would've never spoken to Aubrey again after they broke up.
He looked down at the picture again and felt so much gratitude towards his daughter. Without her he wouldn't have a second chance at possibly making things right with Ramsey. Aubrey wiped his eyes as tears fogged his vision.
"What you in here crying about?" Ramsey asked coming out the bathroom drying her hair off with her robe tied around her. "I'm just looking at her ultrasound again." She sat next to him as she wrapped her hair up in the towel on the top of her head. "How do you feel now that you've seen her?" He shrugged. "I was excited and all nervous before... Now that I got to hear her heart beat and all that I'm anxious. Like she's really in there." He placed his hand on her belly with a smile.
