Fall Out Boy Imagines/Preferences

87. I Don't Dance

Well this was a long one too....

Pete Wentz:

"Alright son," Pete paced in front of Bronx. "Today is your first dance, do you have any idea what that means?"

Bronx raised an eyebrow. "Umm...I pick up Bandit, I go to the dance, I dance with her for a couple songs, and then we sneak out and have sex in the limo?" Bronx guessed.

Pete looked at his son. "Yeah no, that's not what that means."

"But that's what you told me that you and mom did at your prom," Bronx argued.

"Yeah well your mom and I didn't have a pregnancy scare because we knew how to properly wrap it." Pete shot back.

Bronx groaned. "We already established the fact that she's not pregnant!"

Pete clamped a hand over his son's mouth. "Keep your voice down." Pete hissed. "Your tattle-tale sister is gonna tell your mom."

Bronx pulled Pete's hand from his mouth. "Alright, alright."

"Now you listen to me, and you listen carefully." Pete got on eyelevel with his son. "You are not, under any circumstances, to have sex with Bandit Way. Do you understand me?"

Bronx nodded. "Got it, no sex with Bandit. Does that mean oral too or like-"

"Ah-ah-ah!" Pete covered his ears. "I don't want to know about the kinky details of my 16 year old son's sex life!"

"Hey!" Bronx protested. "It was a valid question. You never specified-"

"When I say no sex I mean nothing that can even be considered even remotely sexual should happen between you and her." Pete clarified. "Do you understand the words that are coming out of my mouth?"

Bronx nodded in agreement. "I understand that you want to prevent the making of the most emo child in the world-"

"I also don't want to end up taking care of your love child while you finish high school." Pete added. "And I for damn sure do not want the combined wrath of Gerard, Lindsey and your mother to rain down on me."

The doorbell rang, interrupting this very strange father-son conversation.

Bronx shot to his feet. "I got it!" He yelled.

Nonetheless, they could hear the sound of Saint's, Nirvana's and your feet as you all ran for the door.

Bronx sighed. "Why is everyone so nosy in this house?"

"It's the imminent drama that happens in 'La Casa de la Wentz,'" Pete said. "Okay, do you have the most important item of all?"

"Condoms?" Bronx pulled a roll from his pockets.

"I meant the corsage." Pete snatched them from his hands and tucked them into his back pocket. "Have you not heard a single word of what I just told you? No. Sex. With. Bandit."

"Ooooh, that's what you were talking about," Bronx said, realization dawning on his face,.

Pete looked up towards the heavens. "Please, just have blessed me with one child who might actually make it in this world."

Meanwhile, downstairs, catastrophe was brewing.

"Bandit, you look so pretty," Nirvana complimented.

Gerard scoffed. "Of course she looks pretty, look at her parents." He gestured to himself and Lindsey.

"Thank you," Bandit blushed.