A Reylo Romance: "Don't be Afraid, I Feel it Too"

Yavin_4 - Part 2

Author's Note: I didn't realize I had young readers. This chapter may not be age appropriate (?) for under 13

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We're heading for something
Somewhere I've never been
Sometimes I am frightened
But I'm ready to learn
Of the power of love

The sound of your heart beating
Made it clear suddenly
The feeling that I can't go on
Is light years away

-The Power of Love, by Jennifer Rush

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Rey sits cross legged with my large shirt that she's wearing tucked into her lap. I have my legs stretched out on the bed in front of her, leaning back against the stone wall with a pillow behind me. Rey's cheeks are flushed and one side of the too-big shirt hangs down almost to her elbow. I could sit here and just look at her all night. The candles all around have made the cave warm and muggy and I feel too warm in my long sleeve shirt, but I'm not sure if I should take it off or not.Rey reaches up to her hair and starts to remove her elastics. Her movements shift the position of her shirt, giving me glimpses of her belly button.

"Aren't you warm in that shirt?" she asks.

"Yes." I sit up and pull my shirt over my head. I'm overheating, with Rey being in the same bed as me wearing nothing but a tiny pink undergarment beneath the baggy shirt. A slight breeze blows into the cave, cooling my skin and bringing with it the scents of the forest rain from outside. Rey watches me with a lopsided grin on her face and I suddenly feel self-conscious about having my shirt off.

"You were going to give me a gift?" I ask.

Rey takes out her final elastic and her hair falls in waves around her shoulders. It's growing longer now. She shrugs her shoulders and my glance drops to where the shirt hangs down as it slides a little lower with her shrug.

"I changed my mind," she says.

I look up again. "You changed your mind about giving me the gift?" I hold back a smile.

"Yes." She grabs a pillow and hugs it tight, watching me from the opposite side of the bed. Did I do something wrong? She buries her chin in the pillow and backs further away. Is she scared? Should I put my shirt back on?

"I've never done anything like this before," she mumbles into her pillow, her cheeks flushing red. "I'm a little nervous."

I'm about to ask what she means, but I'm sure I know what she's talking about. My heart races. She's nervous. And I'm terrified. What if I hurt her somehow? Or she hates me afterwards? I close my eyes and repeat a mantra in my head that Uncle Luke taught me to say whenever I'm afraid. Through the Force, I can do all things. Then I remember the last time I was here, on Yavin_4.

"I made a promise to you," I say to Rey. "When you were missing. I promised you that when I found you I'd bring you back to Yavin_4 and I wouldn't be afraid to love you." I say it more for my own sake than hers. She doesn't reply. I slide over closer to her and she immediately withdraws, her back hitting the stone wall behind her. I frown, my chest tight. She's scared of me.

"I won't touch you." I say, swallowing down the lump in my throat. "You can rest in the bed and I'll go for a walk, see if the rain has lifted."

Rey's shoulders drop and she begins to cry, so desperately that I suddenly can't breathe.

"You're going to disappear too." She sobs into her pillow. "Like my parents did."

"No-"

"You left me in the interrogation chair..." she cries harder. I clench my fists. She's right. I did. She has every right to hate me.