A Hole in One's Heart [Kakashi Hatake]

Chapter 1: The "Real" World [Part 1]

So, I am going for a POV shift to first person because I find third person a little awkward to write in. So I hope that doesn't bother you too much. Enjoy!! 

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     I was lying in the grass in the shade of my favorite tree doing nothing but watching the clouds. 'Wow,' I thought, 'I usually can't sit still for more than five minutes at a time, but here I am unmoving for what feels like hours, maybe days, or twenty minutes. Same thing.' The clouds drifted by lazily in the high mountain air and a cool breeze worked its way through the tiny holes in the knit of my sweater. 'This is the life, until next week, of course, when I actually have to do things and adult. I hate adulting.' I paused, chuckling to myself as I remembered one of favorite animes, Naruto. 'Gosh, I never thought that Shikamaru would end up being my spirit animal, who would have guessed?'

     After an intense internal battle and looking at the fifteen unanswered text messages from my mom demanding to know what my plans were for the evening, I slowly extracted myself from the grass only to have it leave weird looking lines on my forearms where they had been pressed against the ground. Giggling at myself like a weirdo, I thought about how the indentations of the grass made me look like I had some sort of infectious disease on my skin.

     I gathered my belongs with a heavy sigh, 'Holy cow, I am lazy enough already! I really need to stop channeling Shikamaru because I am not as smart as him so I can't afford to be THAT lazy and unmotivated.' My phone buzzed again. It was my mom. Who else? Nobody else bothered to text me because I never really bothered to text them back. But, when it came to my mom, I would always text her back something weird like a smiley face or a silly, "Narf!" channeling my inner Pinky from Pinky and the Brain, a staple from my childhood. After walking the amazingly long five minute walk from the park to my parents' house, I threw open the back door and screamed, "¡Hola mamasita, estoy en casa!" In my horrendous white-girl Spanish- not really knowing what motivated me to do that. I always reverted to my pre-college self when I was home because something about being in the house that I grew up in made me act like I did when I used to lived there full time.

     Wrapping my wonderful Mommy in a tight "hello" hug, I quickly turned to run away. It was easier to dodge questions than actually answer them. Unfortunately, my mom was too quick for me.

     "So, Ana, what are your plans for tonight? You didn't answer any of my messages..."

     "Mom, I am twenty-three, I can take care of myself! You don't have to look out for me at every turn, hmph." I said while pulling out the puppy dog eyes hoping that I could charm myself out of this uncomfortable conversation.

     "Guess who I heard from today? Apparently there is going to be a nice gentleman here tonight to pick you up." Her eyes almost glowed in meddling motherly pride. "But, I'm hurt. You move out in a week and we were going to play Clue tonight as a family. Oh! Were you just afraid that you would lose?"

     Scoffing at the implications that my mother made towards my board game abilities, I felt the need to shoot down some of her earlier comments. "Yes Mom, Alan is coming by later. And no, you already know that we will never date. He is literally one of my best friends, but he is a flirtatious tool and I would rather be forever alone than date him. And, I apologize for ditching you and Dad tonight, but my friends threw this together for me last minute and I can't just turn them down." She wasn't too upset in reality since she was a cool Mom, ridiculously chill, so she just nodded.

     "Alrighty then! Just make good choices and have fun. But," she smirked mischievously, 'Oh no, whatever comes next is going to be the opposite of good.' "I don't have to worry about you, do I, because you love that silly anime character of yours." At this point I was half way between blushing and wanting rip my loving mother's guts out through her throat. I will never trust them with anything like that ever again; I don't think that I they will ever stop giving me crap about this. "What was his name again, Wack-a-sheet?"

     "No, it's Kakashi." I retorted putting extra emphasis on all of the syllables. "And besides, that was during high school. I have moved on to men of the more real variety." I put in extra effort so that she could hear the indignation in my voice.

      "Really... So how old is Kakashi anyways?"

     "Twenty-six at the start of Part One, why?"

     "And, um, how tall is he?"

     "Five-foot eleven, and your point is?"

     "So, what's his birthday?"

     "September fifteenth! For god's sake Mom, what is this about?!" The amusement was clear in her eyes now; I fallen for her trap.

     "So that thing you said about only loving him in high school... Would you mind trying to make that point again?" She laughed while internally struggling to keep her cool. That tricky Mom, she had played me like a fiddle using my love of all things trivia against me. The thing is that I could name those stats for lots of characters from lots of different shows- I am hopeless like that, but in this context she really made me sound like a stalker.

     "Well, now that you have successfully made me question all of life decisions, I am going to go and get ready. I don't want to be late." I trudged up the stairs into my old bedroom immediately thinking about all of the hours I had spent watching Naruto in this room. 'Wow, I am thinking about Naruto a lot more than I usually do. What is going on? I mean, I love the show and all, but this might be a little unhealthy.' I started sifting through my closet for anything that I could wear. Usually I just wear comfy sweaters, jeans and combat boots so finding something to wear to a bar or a club was a real struggle. Looking over at the tiny book shelf nestled in my closet, I felt a strange urge to pick up one of my old drawing books lying there on the top. Flipping through the pages I scoffed the shoddy workmanship of my old pieces until I came across an old favorite drawing. There, in all of his attractive, white-haired glory, was Kakashi Hatake. It was actually a really good drawing. I had decided to work in realism for this one; which was not a good idea because seeing him drawn as literally the embodiment of what I find attractive (I had used some artistic license on this one) only made me love his face more. 'Maybe I was a total Kakashi stalker... I drew fanart of him, I looked up fanart of him, I re-watched episodes that he looked hot it, I followed all of the tags on Tumblr that could lead to posts about him, I read his Wiki page countless times, and I read tons of fanfic about him.... HOLY SHIT! WHAT HAVE I BEEN DOING WITH MY LIFE?! The closest that I have ever been romantically with a person was a totally one-sided relationship with a drawn character who is not real. F. M. L. But, hey, it's not like he's real so it's mildly more okay to stalk a not-real-person than a real-person, right?' I continued slowly driving myself insane until I heard Alan arrive.  

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I am not going to comment on how much or how little Ana's feelings towards Kakashi mirror mine. (I am writing a Kakashi x OC, do some simple math people!!) I want to keep the chapters a little bit shortish for now so I will put out part two soon. I hope that you enjoyed! See you at the next update :)

Edited 4/13/2016