Superficial Love|Slytherin Thorn

Chapter 33 - Promise

"Albus?" Sia called out as she rounded the corner to the fifth floor corridor. It was deserted. "Albus?"

Sia moved silently along it, peering into classrooms incase he was in them. He should be here. This was where they always met. "Albus?"

"Shit." Sia spun around at the sound of movement. She watched as Albus emerged from behind a statue, tripping over his feet as he did so.

Albus straightened up, smoothing out his robes and turned towards her. He yanked down his right sleeve, where it had ridden up, but not before she caught sight of the blood smeared across it.

"Ready?" Albus smiled at her, his face open, no sign of anything wrong.

"Albus?" His name was the only thing she could think to say. Her eyes were trained on the sleeve of his right arm hiding the cuts beneath it.

"Albus?" Sia repeated, she looked up at his face open and waiting. Her dark eyes locked on his green ones and she saw the hint of worry in them. All of a sudden she could see right through his mask. His face too bright and happy. It hid the broken boy beneath it.

As she studied him, she saw him realizer that she'd seen through his mask. His features clouded over, the bruises merging into one.

"It's nothing." Albus growled as he pushed past her. "It doesn't matter."

Sia watched his tense figure and lunged forward. Albus let out a hiss of pain as her hand wrapped around his arm and she swung him around. Before he could stop her she pulled up his sleeve.

"Have you just done this?" Sia asked as she gazed at the seeping wounds. She felt him relax beneath her touch.

"It's nothing." Albus said again still defensive but glad he no longer needed to hide. 

"It's not nothing." Sia implored. She gripped his wrist tighter, afraid he'd disappear if she let go. "Something is wrong. You're not okay. Sane people don't do this." 

"You think I don't know that!" Albus yelled yanking his arm away. "You think I don't realise there's something wrong with me. You think I don't tell myself that everyday. You have no idea how bad it gets. All I can think about is how much of a shitty person I am!"

Sia stared at him. Anger and pain radiated off him. "You're not a shitty person." 

"Yes I am! Don't you see that! Fuck!" Albus ran his hands through his hair, grasping his head. "I've fooled you as well." 

"You haven't fooled anyone." Sia said harshly. "You're not a shitty person." 

"Yes I am!" Albus let out a frustrated growl. "You don't understand. I'm a horrible person. I've bullied people. I bullied Rose. I let James manipulate me into doing it. I've manipulated people. All I ever care about is my survival. I try to care about others but I can't. My brain won't let me. Even if it would it wouldn't matter because no one actually cares about me, not really. I don't have anyone to love me, only use me. No one would care if I disappeared. But I can't die because there's so many things I want to do but I can't. I'm so fucking terrified of dying but I'm just as terrified of staying like this!"

Sia stared at him, she stood and watched, letting the words roll from his mouth.

Albus spun around and swung his arm up. Sia gasped as his fist collided with his face. He barely winced at the pain, just taking a step back and shaking his hand out. 

"Ugh! I feel so fucking trapped! And there's no way out, no matter how hard I try. And there's so many things I have to do, things people want me to do, things people expect of me. I try and I try to fulfil them but I can't. I fail every single time. I'm a failure. I've failed my parents, my siblings, Rose, my namesake, the wizarding world. Everyone expects the son of Harry Potter to be great but I'm not!"