The Publicist

Next Time Around

August POV-

I couldn't sleep. I just kept replaying yesterday's events in my mind.

Not because I was embarrassed, although I was.

Or because I gave the worse performance of my life. Which I did. Missing words. Tripping over the dancers. It was a hot ass mess. Eventually I just gave up and walked off as the crowd collectively booed and cheered as I stopped wasting their time.

But none of this was the cause of my restlessness. I was restless because for the first time I realized how bad I messed up. Not just with my actions, but with my lies.

When I saw the state Jazz was in. How broken she truly was. When I realized how much she truly gave to me and how sincerely she loved me, and how I fucked her over, I couldn't have been more ashamed of the fuck boy I was.

I had to make things right. Not get back with her necessarily. She needed time to come to that conclusion, but let her know how truly sorry I was.

Amidst all of the negative videos and tweets about me, I had found out through Trey's twitter they were leaving for Ghana today for a special project.

I had to catch up to her. I wasn't going to stop until she heard how sorry I was.

I would've gave her more time but seeing she was going to be on a whole new continent, it was now or never.

I checked to see what flights were leaving to Ghana. There was one leaving in three hours.

I quickly got up. Brushed my teeth. Washed my face. I had
A huge knot on my head from where she hit me and it hurt like shit. But I deserved it. No sense in complaining.

I put on some clothes and left my hotel to get a cab to the airport.

I figured if she wasn't there already, she should be on her way.

I hopped in a cab and we headed to the airport.

I checked Trey's twitter to see if there were any updates. There were none.

I paid for my cab and went into the airport, going to the nearest check - in counter.

"Welcome to Delta sir. How may I help you?" A lady said.

"Do these intercoms reach people at other check ins or gates?" I looked at the intercom she had in her hand.

"Excuse me sir?" She looked confused.

"If I wanted to say something to my fiancé would it reach back there loud enough for her to hear. If she already checked in or out here if she hasn't?"

"I'm sorry sir we don't allow this. It's for airport business only."

"I understand that ma'am but I need you to understand that she's leaving to go to Africa. And I have to tell her something important."

"How about calling her?" She said sarcastic. "That's what most couples use as a form of normal communication." She gave a fake smile.

My attention got diverted when I saw Trey, Jazz and a couple more people walk in and go to Lufthansa airlines which was all the way at the end of the hall.

I didn't miss her. Thank God. 🙌

I contemplated going down there but I wanted to give her, her space. At least from a distance she would have to listen. Instead of running away. So I decided to just take a chance and just snatch the intercom from this lady.

"Delta Airlines flight..." She said.

I snatched the intercom from her cutting her off.

"Hey!" She yelled.

People started looking.

"I will give you $500 dollars." I whispered to her.

"You can't buy me." She scoffed. "Make it two grand." She held out her hand.

"Two grand!?" I screamed whispered.

"Two grand or I'm calling the airport police over here."

I pulled out 2,000 grand and handed it to her.

She put it in her bra and handed me the intercom.

"Attention. This message is for Jazmine Elise Palmer."

I saw her looking around. She couldn't see me, but I could see her.

"I know you don't want anything to do with me, but just hear me out baby."

People in the airport start looking around confused too.

I saw her shaking her head and saying something to Trey.

"First off baby I want to say I'm sorry from the bottom of my heart for all the pain I've caused you. I'd rather stick a million knives through my heart then see you hurt like you were yesterday.

I messed up. I know. And I'm going to save you the lame brain excuses as to why.

Just know it was million percent me. It had nothing to do with you. You were enough baby. Every bit of you. And I do remember our first time. It was special to me. I won't go into detail
Cause of the people listening, but my slip up had nothing to do with you not fulfilling me. It had everything to do with me not being man enough to take a stand against the temptation that led to it.

I took you for granted I know. I violated you I know. I was stupid I know.

But don't ever think that despite the idiot that I am, I didn't love you. I did. More than anything on this earth.

You stood by me when no one did. You prayed for me to live, when others wanted me to die. And I didn't thank you at the awards because I was upset, but I owe you not just for that, but for my life.

You were more to me than a mere c-dump. I see some kids so I can't say the whole thing. I saw my whole future in you. And I know you felt like you got the better end of the bargain with me, but I was upgraded because I was in your presence. Not only did my career go up, but my entire life did and it's all becAuse of you.

And I know I put on this front like I'm fine without you, but I'm not. Your absence in my life is killing me faster than my failing kidney ever could. I cry over you every night. I dream about you every night and I've been so damn depressed. I just say and do stupid shit to cover this black hole in my heart." I started to tear.

"Know baby that you may not want me now, but if you find it in your heart to forgive me, . I'll be ready, next time around.

I know we have to be apart now, but baby when you come back it's not gonna be the same.

Everything and anything you want I'm going to give to you. No more slips up. No more I'm sorrys.

Just me being the grown man that you need. Giving you what you gave me. I put that on Mel's life baby I do." I broke down.

"Just don't leave me for someone else. Please. All I need is one more chance. Not a thousand. Just one. And if you got a million rules baby when you come back, I'm going to follow them. Without hesitation. I'm going to get it right whatever it takes. Just don't forget me. I love you more than anything or anyone on this planet. Be safe."

I put the intercom down and walked out the airport. I hoped that even if she wasn't receptive to my words now, in time she would be.

While she was gone it was time for me to put in work so I'll be ready for the next time around. 💪💍❤️