STALKER

Chapter 111 - 12th June

I swear I am getting closer to the end.

The atmosphere in the room was as icy. I sat at one end of the dining room table, Weirdo and his shadow at the other. I was going to leave once I handed over the journal but he insisted I stay. So...I sat with my laptop in front of me pretending to do my accounts and checking orders, in reality, I was staring at a blank screen, awkward. Baring my soul, and sharing every thought is not easy to do, letting the ugly, the petty, the weakness show and get scrutinised...and judged.  Argh!!  It's like Dorian Grey showing up with his painting and saying Hey have a look at this!

Weirdo was expressionless. Ben's face was easier to read. He kept owwing and ahhing. He'd taken up position the moment Weirdo opened the journal.  Ben was right behind him, leaning over his back with his chin resting on his shoulder. Now and then he would point at something and mumble. Weirdo kept scratching his ear, it must have felt like a persistent mozzie dive-bombing his ear every few minutes.

"Hmmm...5th June." Instant panic made me go blank. I really couldn't remember anything about that day. Nothing that stood out to me.  Should I? Shit.

"What about it?" Weirdo kept reading. It was Ben who looked abashed.

"The day we met." Weirdo said and then went on to say that it definitely didn't sound like love at first sight. I pointed out he was a rude a-hole that day. Weirdo continued reading, turning the pages with no change in his expression. Ben on the other hand huffed as if he was the one who was being dissed.

"...and you're right you are a shallow bastard with few redeeming qualities. If I was alive I'd beat you to within an inch of your life and make you apologise to Master Peter."   I had no idea what he had just read but it got him all feisty.  Weirdo's number one fan was ready to defend his honour.  At least he wasn't calling me a yaldson again.

"Your shadow is telling me off for being shallow and having no redeeming qualities. He thinks you can do better." I went back to examining the empty screen in front of me when all I got from Weirdo was a smirk.

"I knew you liked that first kiss." Suddenly he started chuckling. "...and you've had a thing for my arse from the beginning." Then Weirdo burst out laughing. I didn't ask and he didn't tell me what was so funny and I decided I couldn't sit there any longer and left the room to the sound of giggles from both of them.

It went on for hours, sometimes only the sound of pages being turned, other times Ben would erupt in a rant. Now and then I stood at the door to watch them. Weirdo was either reading, looking at photographs, or walking around the table examining things with the journal in his hand. Ben was perched as usual on the sideboard, quietly admiring his Master Peter.

Dinner time came and went. I left him a sandwich and coffee. My nervousness was turning into fear I was trying to think of the worst things I had written...OMG, there were so many. I should have followed my own advice "don't put anything down in writing that you don't want someone to know."

I went out to the greenhouse. Turned on the lights and my candle. The sun had long set and Ben's ritual would have to wait for another sunset. I put on my apron and carefully watered my plants, one by one. I told them all my fears and they sympathised.  I recited my incantation to soothe my chaotic emotions.  The greenhouse was a much more peaceful and pleasant place to be.

As I couldn't perform one ritual I thought I'd get started on my next project. I pulled out a small box from one of the shelves. Inside were the small four slices of wood from the tea chest, gold jewelers wire, and red twine. I had already sanded them down, varnished them a few times, and burnt holes into the top of the longer piece. I glued one of the small pieces to a longer one making a long cross. Then wrapped the gold wire where the pieces intersected forming a small glittering X. It was fiddly work, not my sort of thing at all but after a couple of tries I had the wire binding the pieces together neatly. I thread the little cross with the red twine and cut it so it hung low against my chest. It was pretty basic but felt nice to the touch. The object was more about what it could do than what it looked like. I repeated the process and made a second little cross. Before I left the greenhouse I hung the necklaces from a hook ready to test them out tomorrow.