Emery [bxb]

136

"'No, you're doing it wrong!'" Emery mimics, slamming his locker shut. We're in the locker room, gossiping about coworkers, as is our wont. "'I said I would like a dacron swab of my posterior nasopharynx for bordatella PCR and culture, and if it's positive, I'd like a course of azithromycin; whatever it shows, I'd like some codeine cough syrup and ambien, because I can't sleep at all.'"

We were taught in medical school not to doctor ourselves. The trick is balancing using your expertise to ensure you get good care, but not using your authority to insist on treatments, and end up wrong.

Doctor O'Mallory obviously never learned any such thing. He's in with what he thought was viral bronchitis for two weeks but realized is pertussis. Doctors are notorious for being the worst patients, and O'Mallory was tough to deal with on a good day. Now he's driving Emery up the walls.

Em and I were in the room with a few other doctors, suppressing our laughter and sneaking glimpses at each other trying to keep a straight face as he ranted and raged at us.