Prologue
WHACKKK!!
Blood trickling down his back. He gasped at the pain spreading through his spine. He knew he couldn't escape, both from the continuous pain and the fear of the shadow swallowing him whole. He always tried but nothing changed. He cried, begged, knelt. Everything that he could do to escape the pain.
WHACKKK!!
Another hit from the belt stroke his body, slashing the flesh on his back. More blood running down. The damp cold room secluding his cries from the outside world, making his pray for his pain to go away been muffled down inside the darkness of the cramping, stuffing solitude.
WHACKK!!
He closed his eyes. He knew no matter how much he told himself to just rest in the bliss of unconsciousness but still, his body didn't listen. His eyes, his fingers, his legs, all alive and well known to the pain searing into the depth of his fragile skin that had been cut open every time the cursed whip hitting him. His body was trembling so badly, both in fear and in ruthless pain.
WHACKK!!
He felt kind of lightheaded. His head fell, hanging low in between his tied hand that was placed high up above his head, hooked into the hanging anchor-like rusty metal situated in the middle of the metal cage he was in. His vision started to spin around.
WHACKK!!
His midsection suddenly hurt so badly and he knew what it means. If not his life, the life that was growing inside him was in danger and it was his fault. His fault for not staying strong for the innocent life he tried to protect all the five months he knew it was growing inside him. The new light was what he called it. He tried to move but his hands didn't budge any one bit from the hook that had been making him hanging onto it with just the tip of his toes reaching the ground.
WHACKK!!
He closed his eyes. Panicking was something he'd done before and it would never give any effect, neither bad or good so what he could do was hoping. Any little hope that he had inside his heart, he prayed for it, for him to be strong enough to go through the test he'd been through. Sweat trickling down his head.
WHACKK!!
He jerked forward as the whip slashing his already messed up back. The pain was nothing to compare with the pain crippling through his midsection. He was about to scream but he knew it would only prizing him of another punishment for his unacceptable behavior. It was not like he never done something that made him deserve punishments. He always did everything wrong. From the day he was born, who he was, what his status, which class he was preferred to, everything, from his own existence, he was always in fault. Always. He didn't deserve to live, he knew it, they always told him but because they were kind and merciful, he was given a chance to taste a life. He was grateful of that, truly grateful but he didn't understand why. Why they hated the existence of the life inside him. Was it a sin to be alive even when someone as filthy like him was the one bearing the innocent child.
WHACKK!!
He bit his lips, biting so hard that he could taste the coppery taste of blood with his tongue as his lower lips bled. He started to lose consciousness. He was grateful of that but deep inside his heart, his limitless mercy took sympathy of the one inside him, knowing if he lose his awareness of the real world, he would fall into a deep sleep with no one to protect the unguarded child inside him so he stayed strong even though his legs already went limp, forcing him to depend all his body weight onto his hands that were still hanging on the hook.
WHACKK!!
He closed his eyes again. His body jerking wildly as he tried to open his eyes back. He felt something trailing down his thighs. His eyes dilated in exchange of adapting to the dim light in the dark room. He looked down, focusing, and saw a pool of blood forming as he knelt on the floor. He knew he was not strong enough to hold another hit so in panic, he looked around, on the old wooden bed with only one thin mattress and the old rag as the blanket with no pillow, he turned towards the closed metal door, knowing it was locked seeing no one unless the beholder of the pitch black whip that was now decorated with the thick dark red blood trickling from the tip of the loose leather. He was alone with zero hope of having anyone, someone to save him except for the man behind him.
WHACKK!!
He gasped. The pain on his back was unbearable and his belly, just around the small little bump that he tried to protect, also hurting so much. Blood seeping out, running down his thighs and made the big sweatshirt he wore that was already torn like a rag clothes, covering his small, frail body soaked with blood and sweat. His fragile heart shivering in fear for the incoming danger for the child, he couldn't help but his eyes acted on his own, swelling in tears pooling inside waiting for the water of sadness and sorrow jumped off the cliff of the corner of his eyes.
"S..s..sttopp.. " he begged. Tears rolling down on his pale cheek, couldn't stop the swiveling emotions stirring inside him. The need to protect, to give the poor soul a chance to live was overwhelming so he did anything he could think of at the time. Begging was the only way. With his hoarse voice from all the cries and screams, he begged for the life of the child, didn't care the burning throat from the lack of water been passed through the dry throat for days. His hair was damp with blood and sweat.
WHACKK!!
He took another hit. His body quivering from the pain. His head spinning around making all view around him changed blur in the pooling unshed tears and the darkening-near-to-closing eyes, but he still needed to do something so he continued to beg for mercy, bringing forth any energy left inside him to wring out the last-almost- whispering voice out of his voice box, asking for the man to stop.
"Ppp..please...s..sstopp.. " his voice was so low that the words he said came out as unheard mumbles, skipped by a little bit of gasp and sobs with a stream of tears fell from his eyes, also washing the blood trailing from the big gash on the side of his front head down the pale cheek.
WHACCCCKKKK!!!
This time the belt stroke his back with full strength. Tearing his flesh and breaking his scapula. He gasped at the searing pain, no voice coming out from him, muffled when he forced-close his lips, closing his eyes in the idea of having the pain just flew far away from his already broken shoulder and his bleeding back. He could feel the person behind him was ready to give him another strike but nothing came as he heard the sound of the old door been unlocked, making a creaking sound as someone opened it.
"The doctor is here." a woman voice came out. The voice so familiar to his ears, the voice that should be giving him warmth and peace, safety but no, the voice was talking in a tone containing venoms of hatred and poisonous daggers of despise with no trace of sympathy and mercy at all, just the cold unwavering voice.
The person behind him moved. He felt grateful the doctor had come. He didn't realized all his begging really worked against the cold hearts of the man that had been torturing him for days, hooking him inside the room for, a week? Two weeks? He didn't know. He couldn't keep the track of time without any food or water been supplied to him making him awake only to be whipped until he lose consciousness all over again.
The same man that should be the one protecting him from all the pain and the fear but actually was the one locking him in the container of constant pain and fright. It didn't matter actually. He was used to it, being confined since he was just a kid, never been let out to the outside world to see the beauty out there. He was grateful enough he was given a chance to live but for now, he needed to save his child no matter how much it would cost his life. The doctor was here. He still could save the child. There was still time.
"Get everything ready. " the man snarled as he yanked the rope off the boy's hands. Suddenly, the realization hit him. There would be no way for them to save his child. It would only be a dream for anything liked that to happen out of sudden. They were preparing for the worst of all, they were planning to get rid of the child and he just realized it now.
The trembling boy fell on the floor weakly, moving one hand to his belly with another hand keeping him kneeling. His wrist was bleeding from all the weight he'd been putting on it before but he couldn't make himself care for the broken bones or even the gushing blood seeping from neither his back nor his head nor his hands. All he could think of was the safety of his child. He would do anything to save the still unborn innocent soul resting inside him.
"Get moving!" he shouted, yanking the boy's hairs back and pulled his trembling hands up. The boy followed him even though his limp legs were losing balance of following the outraged man pulling the hand which his shoulder was broken earlier, the pain going numb inside him until he couldn't feel a thing. Looking down, he saw blood still trailing down his thighs making a large pool of blood under his own feet, coloring the white tiles in red.
He dragged the boy that was walking weakly behind him. The boy still trembling wildly with tears streamed down his pale face, lips quivering in the verge of unbearable pain and fast depleting energy but still, he tried to resist the strong pull, jerking backward to release himself.
"N..nnoo.." the boy said, trying to pull his hands off him.
The man kept dragging the small boy even though the boy was already staggering in his steps. His grip was so strong that obviously would leave another bruise on the small boy's pale hands.
"N..noo!" the boy said, jerking away from him, trying to yank his hands from the man's tight ruthless grip. He knew he couldn't match the strength of a man twice his size but no matter what would be happening, he would never gave up without fighting for the pure sinless child.
"N..No!!" the boy yelled. Coming unprepared, the small boy fell on the floor with one of his cheeks reddened that sting so much from where the man landed his rough hand on, slapping the small helpless boy.
"Shut up!!!" the man snarled. His eyes were bloodshot and his face was red with fuming rage with the bright gold iris flared at the frightened boy.
"Come here!!" he yanked the small boy again roughly, dragging him to the room he'd never been before. He saw a chair-bed equipped with stirrups and another small pen-like blade, a line of scissors all lying on the table beside the chair.
The boy's eyes widened as he realized of what the man truly wanted to do to him. His assumptions before was not wrong. They were really wanted to get rid of the child. Out of sudden, he jerked back from him. The man's grip tightening around the boy's hands and the poor boy cried to be released from the bruising hold, trying to get away from the incoming disaster that was about to befall onto his child if he did nothing to stop the man. His belly hurt so much like it was slashed open with a chainsaw and a lot of blood trickling down his thighs and his legs making the path he walked became bloody.
The man yanked the boy forward and as they entered the room, he saw the doctor's face. Her face was pale and she looked frightened with her eyes bulged in shock and fear, cold sweat trickling down her forehead. She was not signed in to do anything like this. When a woman came to him to make an appointment to perform an abortion, she never thought it would be like the scene she was seeing in front of her eyes.
Obviously, the young underage- looking boy in front of her didn't want to do the abortion and she, as a doctor, would never do anything like that out of the consent of her patient. When she looked down, at the blood trickling down the boy's thighs as he was still struggling to free himself, she was shocked by the amount of blood that had been forming a small pool of dark blood on the floor, trembling as she knew that kind of blood lost could kill anyone if not treated immediately.
"He's bleeding." she said, lifting her eyes to meet the man in front of him that was still in struggle to keep the small boy down from all his worthless fights to get away from his captor.
"Well, that's a good sign." the man that gripping the boy's hands said, making the doctor looked at him in shock. She didn't know anything about her patient and he seemed to be forced into coming to the set-up appointment with the cruel-looking man took a painful hold of the boy's wrist that she was so sure if the man wanted, he could crush the bony wrist into dust with just using his pinky finger.
The man yanked the boy forward and held him down on the chair-bed.
"Viana, his legs." he said, holding the boy's hands over his head.
"N..no!! Stop!!" the boy yelled, kicking out.
"Now!!!" the man yelled while he tied the boy's hands over his head.
The woman who stood beside the doctor nodded and took the boy's legs roughly with her hands. He gripped one of the boy's legs and put it on the stirrups before tying it down with a rope. The doctor just looked at the peculiar situation in front of her, trying to find even a drop of strength to stop the woman and the man from forcing the helpless boy who cried with a painfully hoarse voice, using any energy that had left in him to wriggle himself free from the restraints tying him down. Something was not right and the doctor knew it. She wanted to help but she was too scared to even move a muscle. Anything like this was not even legal and she knew it but she couldn't do anything to fight someone as powerful as the man and woman in front of him. A big name in corporate world and someone like her would be just a piece of cake they could get rid of anytime. She still loved his life, she got a child at home and she didn't want to die just like that.
"No!!" the boy yelled again.
The man was holding him down with his strong hands. His free legs still kicking out as he tried fiercely to break himself free but nothing he could do against the strength like that.
She caught his other leg and forcing it on the stirrups. She spread the stirrups, making his legs spread out wide. He cried, trying to break away from the restraints holding him down, still not giving up.
"P..Plllease..d..don't..h..he's innocent." the boy pleading weakly, looking at the man and the woman who held him down.
"P..please...d..don't.." he whisper-like voice murmured and he knew he was losing his energy. He was not feed in almost two weeks, being confined without a single drop of water inside the cold damp room in the basement that he called his room and being as weak as he was now was not an unusual thing even though he was used to not having any food or water inside him for so long but since the child inside him needed a lot of nutrition from him, he was heavily malnourished. He solely depending on his shifter's energy to protect his child and now, his energy was depleting rapidly but he couldn't let they took his child from him. Like he said before, he would never back down without a fight for the life of his child.
The man watched him with a cold, emotionless look. His gaze became colder and darker as he fixed his on the boy's face. Turning his head from the crying boy, he looked at the doctor that froze on the floor she was standing.
"What are you waiting for? Do it now!!" the man yelled at the doctor that was standing beside the boy, stunned.
"He's bleeding too much!" she said, her lips quivering in fear of having the poor boy died caused by blood loss.
"DO. IT.NOW." the man snarled, turning his green irises into bright gold as he threatened the already scared middle- aged doctor.
The doctor looked down at the small boy. His face was so pale as he lost a lot of blood. His back and his head was bleeding heavily and she was sure from the look of it, the boy would not last throughout the surgery if his wound, especially the big gash on his head was not treated properly and she would never gamble on a life of two life.
"He might have a concussion...we can't do this. " she said, saving a glimpse at the crying boy who returned her stare with a pleading tearful look.
"I said-" the man started, walking towards the trembling doctor and suddenly grabbed her shirt by the neck, "DO. IT.NOW." the man said, flashing his eyes in bright gold again, giving an absolute order to the frightened doctor.
"You better do it. You don't want to know what we are capable of doing to you, especially your career." the woman who tied down the boy's legs said, glancing towards the doctor giving off the killing vibe to scare the doctor more. "You don't want to live on the street, right?" she asked, threatening as she narrowed her ice- cold gaze fixed onto the poor doctor.
The doctor just looked at the woman, horrified. Then she looked down at the trembling boy. The boy was crying, looking hopefully into her eyes as he tried to plead even just a little bit of sympathy from the kind- looking woman, hoping she was as kind as she looked like. The man released the doctor before he pushed her mercilessly towards the boy. She looked at the boy with tears pooling inside her eyes before she turned her head away from the boy, trying to shed the sympathy away from her heart so that she could do her job right as she was told to. She finally turned her head to the boy, eyes blinking rapidly to force the unshed tears from falling.
"I'm sorry." she mouthed to the boy, avoiding her eyes from looking straight into the boy's deep blue eyes.
"N..no..p..pleasee...mom...dad....no..." the boy cried weakly, looking both at the man and woman who stood still, pokerfaced by the bedside. The doctor's eyes lifted up to look at the pair who didn't even budge from all the pleading and begging the boy did even though they were.......his parents? How could parent do something like that to their own son, moreover to their own unborn grandchild. She couldn't believe her own eyes seeing the cruel parents who managed to have a gut to kill their own flesh and blood.
The man looked down at the boy with a disgusted look on his face.
"I never had a filthy son like you." he spat. The boy's eyes widen in shock and sorrow, his frail heart broken into thousands pieces hearing the ruthless words coming out from the mouth of someone he thought would love him no matter who he was but anything like that would be just a dream for someone like him. His status was the lowest of the lowest. He knew he was nothing as his parents always told him every seconds of his life but no matter how much time he heard something like that being said to him, he still hurt.
"Do it." The man said, gesturing his head at the doctor to proceed.
"N..N..oo...AHHH!!" the boy screamed.
Without anesthetic, the pain was too much for his already messed up body to bear as the doctor pushed the speculum into his hole. She opened the speculum and stretched open the heavily bleeding birth canal. As an omega, the birth canal would opened when the baby was ready for birth but sometimes, when something happened to the host's body, some kind of danger threatening the life of the host, the body would immediately trying to get rid of the fetus, automatically opening the birth canal as the process started. In the case that she saw now, the boy's body was extremely malnourished plus the all the beating he took would make his body weaken so that the existence of the baby inside him would threaten his life.
But even though his body was weak now to the point he couldn't hold the baby but still, an omega was created with a strong body that could hold a child safely inside him so if she tried to save the baby, the child could be save even the life of the boy would be on the line.
"N..no...m..mom..it..hurts.." the boy cried.
The woman besides him just standing there, pokerfaced, looking at him with her cold eyes. The doctor glanced at the woman, hoping that the woman would ask her to stop so that she could save both the innocent baby and the boy's life.
"You deserve it." she said, turning her face at the doctor. "What are you looking at? Do your job." She hissed, flaring her blue eyes into bright red. The doctor flinched, immediately continuing her job as she took another long tube-like thing, fixing it to a hole of a transparent vacuum-like jar on the table.
As for the boy, it broke his heart as he heard his mother said that, looking at him as if he was not worthy. It was not like he didn't know or didn't used to it but to hear someone who supposed to be the one giving him warm hug when he was scared, telling him it would be okay when he was anxious, staying with him all night long when he was sick, saying the most hurtful things to him was heartbreaking. His head was throbbing, it was painful, same as his back, his hands, his legs, especially around his little bump. Everything hurt. He didn't know what to do anymore. His vision started to gone blurry and he started to drift off as he, once again, felt another strike of pain as the doctor was probing the cannula into him.
"AAAHHH!!!" he screamed, couldn't held his voice down from the searing pain of having a strange object inserted into his pre-opened birth canal.
"I'm gonna start now." the doctor said, more cold sweat trickling down her forehead.
"Do it." his father said, still holding the boy's hands.
The doctor looked at him with sad eyes.
"Please bear with it for a bit." she said weakly.
The boy looked down at her as she was standing in between his wide open legs, trying to catch his breath when he suddenly felt a sharp agony ripping through his soul, making him jerked upward only to be held down by the restraints around his legs and his hands. The pain crippling down his spine downright to his lower abdomen the pain was too much that tears rolling down from his eyes. He gritted his teeth as she began to suction the fetus into a collection jar. He gasped as he felt he was tearing inside his womb.
"Just a bit more." The doctor said, trying to block her feelings away as she saw the lump of meat and blood been suctioned into the hollow tube.
"AHHHH!!! " he screamed. The pain was ripping inside him that he had to clench his teeth, avoiding his tongue from being a victim from the sudden muscle cramp as he jerked upwards again, closing his eyes to stop the unbearable pain that made him closed to epilepsy from taking control of his mind. Tears sliding down his cheeks as he reopened his eyes.
He shifted his head, looking down straight on the transparent jar on the table. He saw the transparent collection jar that was earlier nothing full with blood and pieces of meat. Tears sliding down his face but it was not from the physical pain he felt, it was from the pain inside his heart of having the only light in his life that he spent months to protect finally ended inside a transparent jar, being vacuumed until nothing could be recognized from the thick dark red liquid mixing with uneven lumps of meat inside the jar.
He was too weak to save his own child and it was all his fault for the death of the innocent baby. If he was strong enough to protect his baby, if he was witty enough to hide the baby like he'd been doing for all the past five months, his baby would never ended inside a transparent jar and he would never feel like the worst he ever felt in his whole life.
"M...My...baby..." he whispered.
His heart was torn apart as he saw his child was blended into the transparent jar, tears streaming down his cheeks as he mourning for his dead baby.
"Shut it!! That thing is not your fucking child!" his father snarled.
"It's done." the doctor said, getting rid of his bloody gloves. Her eyes glancing at the jar with pity. If she could do something to save both of them, she would do it but not when she was threatened by the boy's cruel parents, not when her career was about on its peak. She had no choice but just became the same cruel monster as the poor boy's parents.
"Well, that's good. Viana, clean him." his father said, getting rid of the ropes tying the boy's hands.
The boy was still sobbing, looking at the jar containing the remaining pieces of his child. He couldn't grasp the reality of losing his child, not even realizing the pain on his back or his broken shoulder, just mourning for the lost of his baby. He couldn't even bring himself to care for the despise hinted in his mother's eyes when his father ordered her to clean him up. He just stared blankly at the jar with sobs and gasps racking through his trembling body.
"I don't wanna touch this filthy thing." his mother hissed, pointing at the boy with a great hatred poisoning her wicked words leaving her red-tinted lips.
"I'll do it." the doctor said, looking straight into the eyes of the woman in front of her. Her eyes flared with the newly- founded confident as she finally couldn't resist but feeling the heavy tug of regrets pulling her heart every time she took another calming breath. She felt guilty for killing another innocent soul even though it was her usual job but she never felt a great guiltiness as she felt now as she saw how much fights the boy had been given to protect his child even he knew the chance of him being success was zero percent. The boy she never met managed to pull a string inside her heart. A protective feel lurking inside her and she knew she had to protect the boy with everything that she could. Even if it was not much but at least she could prevent anything like this from happening again and she didn't know what made her changed her mind but her heart was telling her to do so.
She held her chin high, didn't even wavering as she returning the cold stare of the woman in front of him.
"Do as you like." the woman said, grabbing her fancy handbag before she followed the man, the boy's father towards the door, leaving the doctor alone with the boy who stayed still on the bed, tears streaming down his cheeks.
He closed his eyes with his pale hands, still sobbing. He never cried this much before even though when his parents whipped him from various faults that he did but this time, he couldn't help but cried to his heart content. He knew no matter how much tears he wasted, his baby would never came back to life. But still, he couldn't stop his tears from coming out. He was too sad, feeling hollow inside his heart that he couldn't get rid of the sorrow engulfing him.
"Hey, you are badly hurt." the doctor said, touching the boy's hands gently. She wanted to make amends for the boy's lost. She acknowledged that no matter how much she tried to make up for it, nothing could reverse the thing that had been done. If she was not such a coward, she could save the boy's child but no, she chose her career over an innocent life. She was too selfish.
"Don't touch me." the boy said, slapping her hands away. She looked like in shocked. It was actually not entirely out of shock but guilt. She knew she had committed a grave sin to the boy and she didn't expect the boy to forgive her just like that so she did what she could do, she moved away from the boy but then she could feel a light tug on her sleeves. She looked down; meeting the bluest eyes she had ever seen in her life, looking at her with tears inside.
"I...I'm sorry... "the boy stammered, realizing his mistake.
She was not guilty. She is just following my parents' orders. He thought. He couldn't bring himself to hate the one who practically murder his child since he knew it was not entirely her fault. She was under threat and he didn't want to put any more misery to the frightened woman. He knew he didn't have a choice but accept the lost of his child.
The boy continued to cry, putting his hands over his eyes. Tears were rolling down his pale, bruised cheek. His head still bleeding heavily. His back was a mess too. His shoulder was broken. The doctor looked at the boy pitifully as she took a hold of the boy's trembling hand that had been tugging her sleeves before.
"It's okay. I'll clean you up. " she said, slowly moved the ropes binding the boy's legs.
He was still sobbing.
"Don't move your legs yet. I need to clean the blood off. " she said.
He didn't really care anyway. His baby was gone, blended into the jar and he's done nothing to save his precious baby. He was still sobbing and his body hurt all over that he couldn't move a finger.
"This might sting a bit." she said, pulling the speculum out of his birth canal and put disinfectant around the wound.
"Nnngghh.. " he closed his eyes. The pain was not just a bit actually. It hurt a lot.
"I'm sorry." she said. She began to wipe off the blood on his legs and thighs. The boy was still crying.
"I'm sorry for what happened. I didn't know that you don't want this abortion in the first place. I was paid by the woman you called mother a few days ago and she told me to come to this house as she would prepare everything. I thought this would be like the usual abortion like I always did for those who didn't want their child but I knew I was wrong the moment I saw you. I know no matter how many times I apologized to you, I could never make up to it." she said with a low voice.
The boy didn't respond to her. He just kept crying.
"I'm really sorry. I'm so sorry." she said, sniffling.
He shifted his hands off his eyes and turned his face toward her. She was crying silently and he didn't have a choice unless forgave her since she was apologizing earnestly to him. Slowly, the boy moved his trembling hands to reach her. He stroked her hands slowly, quivering violently. She was surprised by the sudden gesture and the boy looked her in the eyes and smiled weakly.
"It's okay. " the boy said wearily.
He didn't know how he could have the strength to smile and said that to her but one thing that he knew was she was sincerely sorry.
She looked at the boy and smiled. Touching his pale cheeks, she said, "You're so kind, kid." She never knew she could ever met someone so forgiving like the boy even though she didn't deserve an easy forgiveness just like that but she couldn't help feeling grateful to know that she was forgiven. At least the burden of guilt was lifted even just for a bit.
After wiping her tears away, she started again to clean the boy off. She worked silently for a few minutes as the boy started to close his eyes to ease the pain away. His mind had gone to a state where everything blurred. He couldn't think straight. The pain was slowly eating him from the inside.
"Mikayla. " she suddenly said and the boy popped his eyes open, looking at her.
"My name is Mikayla. " she said. " What's yours, kid? "
The boy looked at her for a while and started to open his mouth when a sharp pain ripping through his belly.
"AHHH!!!" he screamed, clutching his midsection.
His face reddened as he tried to tolerate with the ripping agony striking his belly. Startling, Mikayla re-checked the wound.
"Oh my god! You had internal bleeding! " she said.
He could feel blood gushing out as he was drifting off.
"Oh my-hey! Kid! No! Don't close your eyes! Kid! Kid- "she panicked.
"Al..... " the boy said, holding her hands.
"What? " she stopped.
"N..name..Al..Allison." he said and everything blacked out.
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