Aurora's POV:
"Hi, beautiful baby." I blubber, picking him up from his crib. He just woke up from his nap and he looks adorable. I miss him when he's asleep. I just want to cuddle him all day long.
"Is he awake?" Tristan asks from behind me, as I rock Eric in my arms whilst nodding. Tristan takes him from me, supporting his head then walking away with him. He places kisses all over his little face as I watch them with a smile.
Tristan's an amazing father. He's a natural. I know he's never dealt with babies before, as he told me. But he's doing a great job. And he loves Eric so much. He takes care of him with the best of his ability. It makes me so happy when I see them together, he's so gentle with him.
I always thought that I'd be the one taking care of Eric full time. Because I know that with Tristan's social status, comes major responsibility. Yet he's just like any other good father and that makes my heart warm.
"I've got him." He reassures me as I nod. That means he's going to shower him and change him while I go get some things in order downstairs. Tristan's family is coming over today to visit us after a while.
It's been very stormy lately and it's expected to get worse. Everyone's advised to stay home for the next couple of days because of heavy winds and rain. So we figured it would be best if they stayed with us, that way we can be safe together. Besides, they haven't seen Eric in a while.
After dressing myself, I make my way towards the guest bedrooms as I need to prepare them. I adjust the temperature, change the pillowcases, cover the bed with warm sheets and place blankets in every room considering they might get cold.
I feel more tired than usual today. Eric has been waking up more during the night than usual because of the storming. I tried everything to calm him down and so did Tristan. We were basically up all night with him.
After about an hour, Tristan's family finally arrived. The weather isn't too bad right now but it's expected to get really dangerous tonight. I'm glad they made it without any harm.
I led them into the main living room, where I placed Eric in his bassinet so they can see him as they tried to catch me up on everything.
As soon as we enter the living room, the attention was completely taken off me as they divert their focus towards Eric. Thankfully, he's awake and they can see him.
"Oh my goodness, he's gotten so big." Dianne chirps as she leans in to give him a kiss as Mr Black swipes his thumb over Eric's face. "He looks exactly like Tristan when he was little, don't you think?" Dianne asks, turning to Tristan's dad as he nods towards her.
I actually do see it. As Eric grows more, he reminds me of Tristan a lot. I'm hoping as he grows up, he can look a little like me but I guess time will tell.
"Can I hold him?" Isaac asks, turning to me as I nod. I walk over towards them and lean down to lift him up, securing his head as I hand him over to Isaac.
"Woah, what have you been feeding this kid?" He grunts as he holds him up, securing him in his arms as I laugh. He's right, the doctor said that he's feeding amazingly for his age.
"He's so chubby, it's adorable." Aylina coos, reaching for his little hand and holding it in hers as they both start talking to him in baby voices.
"So how have you been doing, darling?" She asks, her hand rubbing up and down my arm.
"I'm okay, thank you." I assure her, giving a light a smile.
"And are you taking care of yourself?" She continues with an intrigued look on her face.
"I try to. It's been kind of hard with the baby though." I sheepishly admit as she nods, understanding.
"Where's Tristan?" She asks. "He's downstairs at the gym." I inform her. "But I think he'll come up soon." I assure her To which she nods.
Tristan's been away from his mafia job for a while. He still manages everything, has meetings, sorts shipments... But he hasn't been on a mission thst includes violence, thankfully. But he still as to stay in shape so he works out here.
If I'm being honest, I can't imagine him ever going back. But I know he will eventually and he will be in dangerous violent situations that can get him hurt. But that thought terrifies me so I brush it off.
We talked for a little while but then Eric started crying, which meant he has to be fed. I take him from Isaac and Aylina, who couldn't stop playing with him, then go over to the kitchen so I can get his bottle.
I started pumping a few days ago. I only do it once in a while when I feel exhausted or tender. Eric rarely latches on properly and it hurts.
As we walked into the kitchen, Tristan's parents went upstairs to unpack and to see him as he was done with his work out.
It was just me, Aylina, Isaac and the baby as they say across the kitchen island, playing with Eric as I prepared his bottle. They caught me on on everything that happened with them while they were away.
"Have you been working out?" She asks, out of the blue as she looks me up and down.
"No. I barely have the time." I shake my head, handing them their cups of coffee.
"But you look so hot." She gasps. "I could never tell you popped out a whole baby three months ago." She says with a playful tone.
"Thank you, Aylina." I sheepishly smile, feeling a little flushed and taken back by her compliment.
I take Eric from Isaac then start feeding him, watching him as his adorable face looks up at me. As he continues feeding, his eyes start to close slowly. I stood there watching him slowly drift into slumber but as I do, the time he finished his bottle, he was fast to sleep.
As I was too busy watching him, I look down at my shirt to find it wet. That's when I realized that I leaked through it. It happened to me before though so it's not a big deal.
I place Eric down in his bassinet, then ask Aylina to keep an eye on him while I go change.
I climb up the stairs and head into Tristan and I's room, huffing to myself as I do.
"And are the shipments in place?" I hear his voice as I enter the room. He's facing the balcony, wearing nothing but a towel around his waist as droplets of water trickle down his torso.
"Get it over with then. Have Jonas call me back when you're done." He orders with a deep voice before hanging up the phone.
"Hey." He says, softening his voice as he turns to me while I smile at him. "Why aren't you downstairs?"
"I have to change my shirt." I tell him, grabbing a sweater then putting it on the bed so I can change. "Where are your parents?"
"They went to unpack in their rooms." He says, typing into his phone as he grabs another towel, drying his wet hair with it.
"Where's Eric?" He raises his voice, a little panicked as he looks around.
"He's with Isaac and Aylina." I assure him and he sighs. This is a change of scenery for me and Tristan, we've grown so accustomed to our baby that it's weird to not have him in our sight.
I sigh and take off my shirt, placing it in the hamper then grab my sweater so I can out in on as the weather was getting cold.
"What's that?" Tristan asks. I look up at him with a confused look.
"What do you mean?" I question as he knits his brows together. "There's a bruise on your chest." He frowns, motioning towards me.
I look down at my breast and notice a huge purple bruise on it. How haven't I seen it before? I've been so busy and tired that I didn't take notice. My breasts have been hurting me a lot lately but I just figured that it's normal when breastfeeding and comes with the territory.
"I-I don't know." I shake my head, my heart rate picking up.
"Does it hurt?" He asks, his tone softening as he strides towards me. His arm snaking around my back and softly rubbing on me.
"I'm taking you to the doctor's." He sighs and I turn to him.
"What?"
"It could be serious." He says, his face twisting up in an angry expression.
"But it's storming." I remind him. I know it hasn't gotten as severe yet but the roads can still be dangerous.
"We'll be quick. Go get dressed." He orders in a domineering tone, his eyes on his phone as he types on it.
"What about Eric?" I ask him, putting my shirt on. Obviously, we can't take him with us but he's never been away from me before.
"My mother will take care of him. We won't be long." He states, not taking his eyes off his phone.
"But he's never been without me. What if he needs me?" I freak out, panic seeping through my voice.
"He's going to be fine. We'll make it quick." He attempts to reassure me as I swallow and take a deep breath.
I sigh and nod, feeling a bit nervous about leaving Eric. It's not that I don't trust Dianne, she's a mother too. A far more experienced one at that. I just feel scared having him out of my sight. He's never been with someone beside me and Tristan before.
I dress myself as quickly as I can, the thought of Eric lingering in my mind. I know I get overprotective of him but it's not like I can help it. I just love him so much and I don't want anything to happen to him.
After putting on my clothes, I wrap my coat around myself and walk back to the room to find Tristan fully dressed as well.
We rush downstairs and go into the living room to find Tristan's family sitting with Eric as they watched T.V. I run over to Dianne and start advising her about Eric: what to do when he wakes up, if he cries, if he's alert. I never left his side ever since he was born.
I practically had to be dragged out by Tristan because of how anxious and overprotective I was being. He said we'll be back in less than an hour but still, anything can happen.
~~~~~~~~~~
Tristan holds my hands and helps me out of the car as we reached Doctor Chambers cabinet. He had called earlier and told her to open which she did. It's hard to say no to a man like Tristan, he can be pretty intimidating.
He shuts the door behind me then opens up the umbrella and holds it over my head as it was raining heavily. As we made it, she welcomed us inside then escorted us into the exam room. I layed there as she examined me as Tristan held on to my hand. I'm very nervous if I'm being honest.
Doctor Chambers steps away then clears her throat. "Aurora, it appears that you have a clogged milk duct." She states as I knit my brows, feeling confused. "It's an insufficient drainage that occurs when breastfeeding if you're pumping poorly, stressed or if your baby doesn't latch on well onto you." She explains.
"Is it anything serious?" Tristan asks, his face twisted up in a frown.
"No, it's nothing to worry about. They're pretty common with breastfeeding." She tells me, setting my mind at ease as I sigh out in relief. "There are cases where they could lead to serious complications but this isn't one of them."
"We'll try heat compression then I'll prescribe you some pills that'll take care of that. There's no need to worry, you'll be fine." She reassures me, giving me a comforting smile.
"Okay, thank you." I smile, sitting up on the bed and putting my clothes back on.
~~~~~~~~~~
I sat in the car, staring at the rain as hundreds of thoughts circle my mind. I feel the urge to cry, to just go to sleep, to pass out. I'm so tired, it's an understatement. This car ride has been the most peaceful time I've had in months.
But I hate myself for thinking this. It makes me feel bad. I love my baby more than I can put into words. But my body isn't the same anymore, I feel drained and I sometimes don't recognize myself anymore. Am I a horrible mother for even complaining? Should I even be whining about this?
The sound of the brakes being pushed shakes me out of my state of daze.
The guards open the door for us as we both step inside. As soon as we do, I hear a loud crying echoing through the corridors. My first instinct is to panic, I run towards the sound, my heart hammering against my chest.
Tristan trails behind me as we enter the lounge to find Dianne, holding Eric and attempting to quiet Eric down as he cries loudly.
"What happened?" I huff out, walking over to them as she softly bounces him up and down but he won't stop crying.
"He was asleep but then he woke up and he won't stop crying. I tried to get him back to sleep but-" She explains as Eric kicks his feet and thrashes his arms.
"It's okay. Thank you for watching him." I smile as she hands him over to me.
I pick him up and start rocking him back and fourth and in just the matter of a few seconds, his cries quiet down and he sniffles, nuzzling his face into my neck.
I take him into the other room and out to the garden. He loves playing with the flowers and it always calms him down as he gets distracted by them.
~~~~~~~~~~
It's been a long day and alas, it was time for bed. Tristan's family are settled in their rooms, and so are we.
I sat in front of my mirror, combing through my hair as Tristan prepared to put Eric to sleep, changing his clothes
I untie my robe so I can stay in my little lace night gown. It's what I feel more comfortable in. As I grab my hair tie, Tristan enters the room in his sweatpants.
I really don't want to talk to him. I can't even look at him or Eric without feeling guilty for thinking the way I did today. For getting angry and even blaming them for how exhausted I am.
"You've been upset all day." Tristan casually points out. "Are you okay?" He asks. I tried my best to suppress my feelings all day but those three words make me burst into tears. I place my hands over my face and turn away. I feel so stupid and ashamed.
"Don't cry." Tristan mutters in a deep voice as he pulls me closer. "What's wrong?"
"I feel awful. I'm a bad mother." I shake my head down, my chest heaving up and down.
"What do you mean?" He asks, knitting his brows in confusion as he grabs my hand.
"I-I shouldn't be complaining about how tired I am." I tell him, realizing how ridiculous it sounds after I put it into words. "But I am." I wheeze, feeling my face flushing red. " I'm so tired. But it's not your fault or Eric's."
"You're not a bad mother, baby." He sighs but I continue to cry, pushing past his sentence.
"Look at me." He orders as I hesitantly raise my head as his eyes meet mine.
"You're allowed to feel tired, Aurora." He tells me, brushing my hair behind my ear. "What you're doing is not easy" He continues, trying to calm me down.
"I just feel guilty." I sniffle,wiping my tears with the back of my hand.
"You shouldn't." He assures me. "You deserve to take a day off. You've been taking care of him everyday ever since we left from the hospital." He continues to console me, which he almost always succeeds at.
"Okay?" He whispers, his voice deepening more than it already is. "We're still getting the hang of this." He reminds me to which I nod. He's right, as always.
"You don't have to feel bad." He soothes, his large hands reaching over to the sides of my face and pulling me closer. He presses his lips against my forehead then pulls me into his chest as I hold tightly onto him. "Thank you." I whisper against him and he nods, kissing the top of my head.
"I'll take him. You can get some rest." He says, his hand stroking my hair lightly as he places his chin on the top of my head.
"No, it's okay. I want to stay with him for a little." I tell him and he nods. He grabs him from his crib and places him next to me on the bed, I lay my head on the pillow, turning to my side so i can watch him.
Tristan pulls the blanket on top of us then places a kiss on my forehead before walking out of the room.
I watch Eric, rubbing my thumb against his soft little cheek. There really isn't anything I wouldn't do for him. I guess today was just one of those off days where you get frustrated with everything. It's not like I'm having regrets or anything. I'm guessing I just need a prolonged well deserved sleep with no interruptions.
I shouldn't have left him alone today, I should've taken him with me. He's too little and it's too early for me to go anywhere without him. I know he was in safe hands with Dianne since she adores him, but he's not used to anyone but me and Tristan.
"You know I can hire people for you." He suggests, making me swallow nervously.
"No, it's fine." I reply with a tired tone, trying to change the subject.
"Aurora." He says in a stern voice. "I think it's about time we move on, yeah?" He asks. I know what he's referring to: my inability to trust anyone after the whole ordeal with Claire. I don't even want to think about it.
"It won't be like last time, I promise you." He tells me, sitting next to me on the bed.
"I'll do more background checks and extensive research before I decide to bring anyone into our home." He vows, his hand holding on to mine. "They'll just clean, cook and leave. You won't even notice them." He continues, attempting to convince me.
"That way you can have more time to yourself." He says, taking a seat next to me. "And I can have more time with you." He smirks, brushing my hair back. I smile back, leaning in to give him a little kiss.
He goes back to the closet while I sit up on the bed, crossing my legs and placing Eric in front of me. He looks so adorable when he's looking at me.
I look down at him as his little hands reach up to grab strands of my hair. He starts giggling, completely startling me. This is his first time doing that.
"Oh my gosh." I gasp out loud, clapping my hands. "You're laughing."
"TRISTAN." I call out for him, to which I hear his loud footsteps nearing in.
"What happened?" He panics, coming towards me with a frown on his face but it soon fades away when he sees he excitement on my face.
"Eric's laughing, he's laughing." I chirp, practically jumping up the bed at this time.
He stands by me and watches him as he plays with my hair. I scrunch my nose at him to which he laughs even more.
"Hey, you've never done that before." Tristan says, leaning in to carry him. He holds him up and look up at him, giving him a spin which makes him laugh even louder.
It's moments like these that just make me forget all about the doubts I have from now and then. I wouldn't trade any of this for the world. I have a family. That's something I never thought I would say.