The days past slowly without Rosie by my side. She'd been ignoring my calls, and to be honest I was too afraid and ashamed to show my face at her house. I couldn't eat or sleep, or concentrate at all.
I was constantly cranky and snapped at everyone. The guys had attempted to get a response from Rosie as well, but by the looks of things she was ignoring all of us.
I didn't blame Craig for telling her, I wasn't mad at him. If I'm honest I just didn't have the energy to, and it wasn't his fault anyway.
He only did what I should have done months ago – told the truth. But I didn't. I was a coward, and now I was paying the price.
I lost the love of my life.
For good.
What the fuck was the point in even living any more? I ruined everything. Absolutely everything I touched turned to shit.
It was all my fault.
''You've gotta keep trying.'' Liam urged me, nodding encouragingly.
I ignored him.
We had made up, so there were no hard feelings any more, but I just couldn't take the rejection any longer. I couldn't hear the dial tone run dead or even check my phone to see I still had no texts from her name one last time. I just couldn't. Not again.
I had spent the last three days doing that and I wasn't about to do it again.
''Josh, come on, It's Rosie! You can't give up on her, not now!'' Zack said.
I shook my head.
''She's not gonna talk to me. Ever. And each time I try it gets harder and harder! I can't do it any more, she's gone!'' I yelled. They all winced, but didn't back down.
''You don't know that Josh! She's mad! If you just get her to listen then she-''
''NO!'' I yelled. ''I can't..'' I said quieter.
They all looked at me sympathetically.
I glared.
I didn't want their sympathy, I wanted Rosie.
She had every right to push me away, and I hated it. But there was nothing at all that I could do about it. She was gone, and I had lost her.
Sighing, I realised they weren't going to leave me alone with this. Heaving myself out of the sofa I was sitting in, I ran my hand over my face, through my hair, and walked to the door.
I looked down at what I was wearing – sweats and a t-shirt. It was going to have to do. With one last deep breath, I rolled my eyes and left the house.
I tried not to think about what I was doing, in case my common sense kicked in and I turned back around.
My hand made contact with the front door before I had the chance to change my mind.
I heard shuffling around, and my heart leapt into my throat. If she answered the door, and if I saw her...I would loose it again. To see her beauty and know I could never call her mine again..it would be too much to cope with.
A pair of blue eyes peeked through the small coloured window in the centre of the door, before a lock was clicked and slowly the door was pulled back.
A fist flew out of nowhere, hitting me right in the eye. Out of shock, I fell back, clutching my eye as I hit the ground. Aiden towered over me, almost growling, like an angry dog bearing his teeth.
''You're not welcome here.'' he snarled.
All I could do was look at him, as the pain in my chest, my heart, was joined by the throbbing in my eye and a kink in my neck from the punch – my head having been thrown back, hard.
Why did he have to answer the door? All I wanted was to talk to Rosie..
Aiden turned abruptly and made for the door again, before pausing and turning back around. He grabbed the front of my shirt and pulled me to my feet, glaring into my eyes.
''If I ever see you near my daughter again, I'll make you wish you'd never been born. Got it? Don't call her. Don't talk to her. Don't come here. Don't stop her at school. You leave her alone. Understand?''
I nodded slowly, a lump forming in the back of my throat.
''Good.'' he spat. Shoving me away from him, looking at me like I was something gross on his shoe that he'd stepped in.
This time, he slammed the door in my face, the bang echoing in my ears as I heard him stomping up the stairs.
Numbly, my eyes glanced towards where I knew Rosie's bedroom window was. The blinds were closed but I could see where she was poking her face out to watch the scene before her. As she noticed I was looking, she pounced away from the window, hiding herself again.
I sighed.
Slowly I turned, and walked back to my house, where all the guys were waiting expectantly. They all hissed when they saw my eye, looking at me apologetically.
Sympathetically.
I ignored them all, and went straight to the kitchen for some ice to put on my already swollen purple eye.
I sighed again.
I guess it was time to move on.
Rosie's P.O.V
School started back today.. I was terrified. I didn't want to have to face him, I wouldn't be able to cope. I knew the second I saw his face.. that would be it. I would be in pieces again.
I'd done nothing but cry since it happened.. I missed him. I missed him so much but.. I was hurt. I was overwhelmed with regret, for being so stupid, for falling so hard for someone who was using me. For money. For pride. For a bet.
I gave him my virginity.
I'd never get that back now.
My first love, my first everything, and it was all a lie.
Part of me hated him, never wanted to see him again. Another wished it was all a bad dream and I could run into his open arms and have that warm safe feeling only he could give me again.
Sadly I knew it was over.
I was walking slowly to school – yes I have to walk now. It's not like I can get a lift with the boys any more. It had taken all of my energy and then some to just get out of bed. Knowing I had to face this day alone.
I probably looked like death, I know I felt like it. My feet were trailing the ground and my eyes didn't lift once. I watched as my feet kicked at the rocks and the dried crunching leaves along the path.
The ground was a bit damp and small patches of snow still remained in some people's driveways and front gardens. The remains of snowmen slowly melting away, lopsided little white men with the carrots and coal facial features sinking, falling to the ground. To be honest they all looked like puddles of icky grey mush with a carrot poking out.
I heard the whoosh of a car and turned around, not thinking, and saw Josh and his boys, in the back convertible sports car, speeding up the road as always. I felt the knot in my stomach return and the lump in my throat swell.
Closing my eyes, I took a deep breath, and kept walking.
I had forgotten how much school can drag on when you have no friends. No reason to be happy. Nobody to smile at you and nobody to smile back at. I was receiving weird looks all day, people wondering why I wasn't with Josh. A few people seemed happy. Finally the loser, dork, got what she deserved – to be miserable. I can't believe I'd convinced myself that maybe things with Josh really were going to work out. How stupid am I? A few people threw me the 'I told you so' look, while some gave me a smug look, while girls were grinning from ear to ear to hear that the school hottie was back on the market, and a small few gave me looks of sympathy.
Not one bothered to ask me if I was okay.
Not one spoke a word to me.
Because in reality – not one cared.
Lunch time came around and I took the sandwiches Daddy had made me out of my bag, left my belongings in my locker and headed outside for somewhere to sit. I found a tree nobody seemed too close to and sat with my back against it, bringing up my knees, and slowly nibbling on my sandwiches. I didn't have much of an appetite. I just wanted to go home.
I stared longingly at the school gates... if only.
Familiar voices made themselves heard loudly and I turned to see Josh and the others walking around. There was a girl on Josh's arm.
Typical.
He'd replaced me already.
However, he appeared to be trying to get her off of his arm. He seemed uncomfortable, his eyes darting this way and that. He eventually got her off of him and by the looks of things said some stern words to her and she stormed off, her six inch heals click clacking beneath her. Josh ran a hand over his face and caught up with the others.
As he glanced my way, Time seemed to stop. It felt like that first day I saw him, when he and the boys were sitting in the car and I was making my way into school. The air was knocked out of my lungs and it was like nothing else mattered, nobody else existed, just us.
I began to smile, until I saw the black eye he was sporting, and I winced.
Slowly he made his way in my direction, ignoring the rest of the boys as they asked where he was going, until they saw me and nodded understandingly.
His eyes were tired and sleepless, and his hair was scruffier than usual. However he still managed to pull it off in his black wife beater, chain necklace, and black skinnies, accompanied by his favourite pair of army boots.
He didn't look himself at all, and I hated the sight of him being hurt.. that black eye.
Daddy had done that, but I understood why. He was just angry that Josh had hurt me.
Josh finally approached me, and sighed, running a hand over his face.
He opened his mouth, and I watched carefully as he closed it again, opening it once more to speak. He didn't seem to know what to do with himself as he played with his hands and couldn't meet my eyes.
Finally, he took a breath, and spoke.
''Rosie I-''
He was cut off by that slut from earlier, throwing herself into his arms, causing him to stumble back as he caught her out of instinct and she crashed her lips to his.
I watched in horror as he at first struggled with her until he gave in, and to my heart break.. he kissed her back.
The neatly cut triangles of my sandwich fell to the ground as I rose to my feet and ran. The tears had long since escaped my eyes and I just ran and ran until I couldn't run any more. I was panting heavily, shaking, hyperventilating almost.
I fell to the ground below the bleachers and hugged my knees to my chest, crying.
A pair of arms wrapped themselves around me but I struggled against them.
''No!'' I whimpered, pushing them away. But they were bigger than mine, stronger, whoever it was wasn't giving up and I finally gave in and cried into their chest.
It was Liam.
He held me close as I sobbed into his chest, stroking my hair and whispering words of comfort into my ears but it didn't help, I didn't stop crying. I didn't stop shaking.
Call me over dramatic but it was really like the end of the world for me. Everything had crumbled around me and I just had nothing.
Nothing.