NOPI Chapter 54
Sephine's POV
The midterm exams just finished and it's already November. 1 month and a half nalang ay matatapos na ang task ko as an exchange student, aalis na ako't babalik na sa Elite School.
And so I've decided.
Nandito ako sa room ko, sa harap ng study table na kung saan nakapatong ang phone ko.
Anong pinag-desisyunan ko tanong niyo? Well, after that time we spent on studying at the music room, I've been thinking a lot and what I thought of all came to one end, a question: WHEN WILL I TELL HIM THE TRUTH?
After the exams, I gathered all the courage, resolve, determination I can gather and this day is the day when I've decided to tell him. My resolve is now a 100%.
I can do it. I will tell him.
If not me, then who?
If not now, then when?
I need to tell him now.
NOW.
THIS INSTANT.
IMMEDIATELY.
Kinuha ko na ang phone ko't tinawagan na si Charles. Hindi naman nagtagal ay sinagot niya.
"Yes, milady?" pagkarinig ko palang ng napakamalambing niyang boses ay natigilan na ako kaagad
I can already imagine him sitting at their dorm's sofa while watching TV and smiling like an idiot.
For some reason, my resolve shrank to 90 % now.
"I.. I want to tell you something, Charles"
"Hmm. I already know. We haven't seen each other for days, so I could already guess what you wanted to say," sabi niya kaya naman kinabahan ako bigla
"Y-you do?" tanong ko
Nang hindi siya sumagot kaagad ay hindi ko napansin na pinipigilan ko na pala ang paghinga.
"You miss me, right? Hahaha. Ano ka na, Seph. There's no need to be shy. I miss you too"
*Stab
Napahawak ako sa puso ko't napaupo sa upuan ko while closing my eyes.
It felt like I was stab at the heart or something.
Fck, my resolve.. My resolve shrank to a 50% in an instant.
Remembering my time limit and feeling desperate to protect my 50 % resolve to tell the truth, I stood up once more and shouted.
"I.. No! I want to see you! I have something important to tell you! Let's meet Charles!" sagot ko
Mukha namang nabigla siya ng bahagya sa sinabi ko dahil tumahimik ang kabilang linya pero hindi rin nagtagal ng marinig ko ang tawa niya.
The moment I heard his his laugh that was like music to my ears, I felt my heart and my resolve waver again.
"You wanted to see me that much? Haha. It's still.. 3:16am, Seph. Could we meet later? If we were saw together at this time, what do you think people would think?" tanong niya kaya naman nanlalaki ang mga mata kong tinignan ang wall clock ko
Napasapo na ako ng noo ko ng makita kong 3:16am palang pala talaga! What the hell?! What was I thinking?! I didn't even catch a wink of sleep after finishing my exams!
"Oh my god, I'm sorry! I didn't think of the time! Did I wake you up?" tanong ko with a LOT of concern dahilan kung bakit siya natawa
So that was why he was late at answering the phone. He was actually sleeping. I'm such an idiot.
"I'm fully awake now, thanks to your sweet and silly call. Have you slept?" tanong niya kaya naman napuno ako ng konsensya kaagad
"I haven't. I'm sorry. Go back to sleep, okay?" tanong ko
"Okay then. Let's meet later. Calm down, okay? You sound so energetic to me" sagot niya kaya naman napilitan nalang akong tumawa
"Aha-ha. Yeah, well.." I wanted to tell you the truth after a whole week of thinking so badly
"I miss you," sagot ko nalang, which is also true
"I miss you too. Let's sleep"
"Hmm"
"I love you,"
*BANG
My last 50% of resolve... immediately perished.
"I.. I love you too," bulong ko't narinig ko nanaman ang tawa niya
"You should end the call" bulong niya pero napailing na ako kaagad
"Just let it end by itself, I don't want to end it" sagot ko
"Okay,"
Humiga na ako sa kama at tumitig na sa ceiling.
*sigh
Looks like I need to gather courage again.
*
Waking up, I quickly went to shower and fixed myself. After doing my routine, I immediately went to the Music Room only to see Charles doing some important work, so I waited for him to finish.
When he was done, he was called through the intercom by the Academy's Student Government's Public Information Officer. He was asked to proceed to Sir Felipe - Taxation professor, in the Faculty Office.
After that, he was going through some important calls.
And after that... Blah blah blah
After that.. Blah blah blah
After that... Blah blah blah
After that...
"..........." - me
Well, the list goes on.
It's like everything's going against me. No one knows how much I'm suffering and wavering with this decision.
Yes, I only have to tell him the truth but.. Everything's easier said than done. I'm not really worried about telling him my past.. I'm just worried that..
I might make him mad, sad, in pain.. And.. I don't want to disappoint him.
"Seph? My job's done now. We can finally talk now," pagkasabi non ni Charles ay agad na akong tumayo at pinanood lang siyang lumapit sa akin
Seeing him walk to me, smiling and looking at me with so much love and affection. My heart began to swell up with guilt once more.
I really.. I really want to tell him the truth. I really do.
Pagkalapit niya sa akin ay agad na akong huminga ng malalim at tumingin sakanya.
This is it. I will tell him the truth. I will!
"Charles, I.. I.."
"You.. what Seph?" naguguluhang tanong ni Charles kaya naman huminga na ako ng malalim at pinigilang umiyak
"I'm sorry. But the truth is.. I'm... I'm not----"
"Sephine, Charles?" napanganga na ako nang marinig ko ang boses ni Ma'am Viola
Fck. It's Charles' mom!
Just what is wrong with me? Ni-isang katiting ng luck wala ba sa akin?
This was my chance! I already picked up every ounce of courage I can gather!
I tried doing it for the whole day but everything, everyone's interrupting.. Oh god, I don't know if I can still gather the courage again!
"H-hello, Ma'am Viola" bati ko kaya naman tumango na siya saka tinignan si Charles
"Be sure to come home this evening. Your dad needs to talk to you," sabi ni Ma'am Viola kaya naman tumango na si Charles
Aalis na sana si Ma'am Viola nang mukhang may naalala siya bigla't tinignan na si Charles.
"Oh, I'll ask the head chef to prepare your favorite dishes. You look thinner, Charles" namula naman si Charles at agad akong tinignan
"Stop it, mom" bulong niya dahilan kung bakit natawa si Ma'am Viola at umalis na
Humarap naman si Charles sa akin habang kumakamot sa batok niya.
"Sorry about that. What was it that you wanted to day?" tanong niya kaya naman napanganga na akong napatitig sakanya
"I... I..." ngumiti naman siya saka hinintay ang gusto kong sabihin
My heart skipped a beat and my eyes immediately swelled with liquid - my tears I've tried to hold in ever since this morning.
Everything.. All these obstacles.. All that's been happening.. Are they telling me to give up? To shut up? To not tell him?
But I need to, right? I mean I don't want to fool him anymore. I don't want to lie anymore.
But if I told him the truth.. Would he avoid me? Magagalit ba siya sa akin?
I... I..
"I can't.. do it" sagot ko't on cue ay tumulo na ang luha ko
*
Charles' POV
"I'm sorry.. I'm sorry"
Due to my shock, I was stood rooted on the ground and watched her cry in front of me.
What.. What on earth?
Nang matauhan ako na hindi 'to panaginip ay agad ko na siyang niyakap ng mahigpit.
"Shh. I should be sorry. You've wanted to talk to me ever since midnight. But some things and some people just keeps on getting in the way. Whatever it is that you wanted to tell me, it's fine. You don't have to tell me. You can tell me next time, okay? Please stop crying. As long as you're happy, it's fine" sagot ko
She flinched and cried harder making me more worried than ever
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Author's Note: Hi guys! If you liked the revised version of the book, be sure to raise your voices and give me your feedback. And if you saw some mistakes here and there, please do tell me. Feedback is important for further improvement and growth. Please do vote and comment! Thanks for reading guys! Have a blessed day! XOXO~