{ Chapter dedicated to: @Chocolatelova98 love you xx }
Song for chapter: A thousand years by Christina Perri (that some never failed to make me cry so hard smh)
-
"How have you been?" Liam asked carefully, as if his choice of words are gonna hurt me.
"I'm fine" I answered coldly, ignoring their gazes and worried looks.
"Lou, were worried about you--"
"Well don't be, I don't need you" I hissed at Zayn, suddenly feeling angry.
"Look, we know that you miss--"
"Don't. You. Dare." I snapped insanely mad at Niall, who gulped, seeming somewhat terrified.
"Woah, calm down--"
"Don't you tell me to calm down!" I yelled at them, my face red from anger as I felt the adrenaline rush through my veins. They all looked at me as if I was some monster.
"Guys, I'm sorry but you need to leave. I honestly appreciate your visit but something came up" My mom's voice snapped them out of the weird stares they've been giving me. They all glanced at me one more time; before getting up and leaving without a word. I sighed in relief, now that they weren't in my sight anymore.
"Boobear?" My mom's soft voice asked, as I turned around, still fuming in anger.
"What?" I asked, quite harshly as I saw her eyes widen in horror, her jaw hung open as she flinched.
"Have.. Have you been taken your pills?" And I froze; forgetting that not taking them anymore will make severe changes.
"I... I laid them off for a while.." I gulped; as her eyes widened even more. She then glanced at my arms, which one of them was covered with brackets just so I can hide the scars.
"Show me your arm" She demanded coldly, as I froze in spot. I was about to protest when she took my arm in her grip, removing them only to reveal the new read scars and the fading ones. She stared agape; as I noticed something wet and warm hit my scars. I looked down only to notice my mom's tears falling down her cheeks as she held in a sob.
"W-Why Lou?.." She hiccuped, and I felt slightly guilty, but held my cold expression.
"Because without Harry, life isn't worth it..." I mutter under my breath, pulling my arm away as I wore my bracelets and sprinted off to my room, only to end like I always do: a sobbing mess.
-
I stood inside the clinic, feeling terrified insider as I didn't want to show any emotions from the outside.
"You'll be okay?" My mom's voice soothed the air that wrapped around us. I nodded, gulping quietly as we took our seat, waiting impatiently for my turn.
"Mr. Tomlinson?" The employee asked skeptically, directing her question to me.
"That'll be me" I answered as I glanced at my mom, who simply nodded her head as an approval for me to leave. I stood in front of the wooden door, knocking softly.
"Come in" A kind voice spoke through the thick wooden door, as I did so. The walls were covered in lime green paint, the paint was softly chipped at the corners and endings. I then turned to the woman seated behind the desk, a smile plastered on her features. She looked in her early 20s, a pair of glasses rested on the bridge of her nose as she chucked it a bit further up, gesturing me to take a seat as I did.
"Hello there Louis, my name is Doctor Shane, but you can call me Valerie" She said, with that half-heartedly smile and nice gesture.
"Hi" I simply spoke, sitting on the chair in front of her huge desk.
"So, Louis, here is a place where you can talk to me about anything. I'm not only a doctor here; I'm a helping friend too" She nodded reassuringly, smiling even wider as I fake smiled, on the verge of loosing my temper.
"So, mind sharing the story of why you're here?" She asked carefully, as I snorted.
"You already know that" I replied sarcastically as I pointed at the file in front of her. My harsh attitude pushes everyone away. How come once I said that all I can hear is laughter?
"Oh, I know but I wanna hear the whole story from you" She cheered, as I raised my eyebrows at her. Still smiling she is. I sighed, trying to get comfortable in my seat as I opened my mouth, afraid to talk.
"It started when I was probably 9, that's when I was aware that I had it.."
-
"Lou! Hurry up, were gonna be late!" Niall chanted from downstairs, as I quickly wore my converse, a smile tucked my lips. I ran downstairs, where Niall and my mother stood.
"Let's go!" Niall spoke, tugging my arms as he physically pulled me outside, tripping once on his shoelace in the progress. My mom waved goodbye as we walked towards Liam's house, which was only 3 houses beside mine. Niall's house was one the end of the street, everyone literally knew each other in the neighbourhood. We then reached Liam's house, it only took to banging of Niall's fist on the door before the door flung open, only to get Liam's face to get banged by Niall's fist. My eyes widened, as I tried stifling my laugh, but it was too much. I clenched my stomach, laughing loudly and squinting my eyes shut as I heard Niall gasping and apologizing, whereas Liam groaned in pain as response.
"That's not funny!" Liam pouted, as Niall continued apologizing.
"It was for me" I smiled as we both entered his house. His house was big and amazing, it's our first time here seeing that we just became friends and don't really know each other that well.
"So what do you guys wanna do?" Liam asked, slumping on the couch in the living room as we did the same.
"Let's play arm wrestling!" Niall announced, making me grimace and Liam to frown.
"I thought something less dangerous, how about video games?" He asked, and before I could answer, Niall huffed.
"You guys are no fun! Are you scared?" He asked nonchalantly, raising an eyebrow at us as I shook my head, not even hesitating and Liam just looked at his hands.
"Well, c'mon! Who wanna go first?" He asked, furrowing his eyebrows as I slightly raised my hands, he sure did noticed because he had the widest smile plastered on his lips.
"Great!" And that's when we played arm wrestling for the rest of the day. We has fun, I was honestly glad that I made amazing friends such like Liam and Niall. The day have ended, and I said my farewell, slowly walking back to the house.
"Mom! I'm home!" I yelled as I entered the house, kicking of my converse as I walked into the living room. I heard sobbing, what was going? I slowly entered the living room, only to be greeted by my mother, whom fave was soaked with tears as my dad hugged her, calming her down. Aunt Delilah was there too, tears fell down on her cheeks but she tried holding her sobs.
"Mom?" My voice barely came out, as both of them snapped my way. Mom's eyes were red and puffy and she looked so tired. Dad just looked at me emotionlessly, holding my mother as she sobbed even more. Aunt Deli (short for Delilah) had stared at me, not sure what to say as she glanced at my fragile mom.
"What happened?" I asked, walking slowly towards my mom, whom looked at me and cried even harder. Honestly, what was happening?
"I think it's better if we don't--" Aunt Deli was cut off by mom's loud, promising sob.
"H-He deserves to k-know" My mom hiccuped, as Aunt Deli whipped away her tears, looking at me with a sad look in her pure blue eyes.
"Lou, y-your sisters... T-They passed a-away Lou.." That's when she fell on her knees, crying even harder. I just stared at her, my mouth wide agape as I stuttered.
"Lou?" My mom asked lowly, extending her hand to caress my cheeks but I pulled away too quickly.
"Y-You're all a b-bunch of l-liars!" I protested, haven't realized I was crying until I felt the tears fall onto my shirt. I remembered how they were all happy, fizzy and daisy said this lame joke that got me laughing so hard at how lame it is. I then burst in laughter through my tears. My aunt and mom looked quizzed as to why was I laughing.
"Lou, what's so funny?" My mom asked through tears, I then remembered what they said. I glared at them, honestly mad.
"I'm not, d-don't lie to m-me again!" I snapped, then remembered how Lottie wanted to dye her hair red, but accidentally dyed it pink. I burst laughing again, images of her terrified look and silly pink her flashed through my mind.
"Lou, are you okay?" My aunt asked, a look of shock and worry written all over her face.
"Yes, now s-stop l-lying, I-I'm going to bed.." I snapped coldly, quickly pick up my bag, and burst out laughing remembering her silly pink hair again.
"Lou, are you sure--"
"I'm fine."
-
"And that's probably how it started, my mom and aunt was worried an awful lot, and my dad... Well, he didn't give a shit so yeah.. I remember when we first went to the doctor, my mother asked why didn't I re-act earlier so they can know, but the doctor only said that the topic mixed up his emotion pretty badly. My mom always said I was a happy kid when I was younger. When I knew I could be better after taking the pills and never forget them, I took them on time. And I barely had a breakdown, maybe once or twice after that in my life time. So yeah, thanks for listening to the depressing story by me" I sarcastically spoke the last part, as I, surprisingly, heard her laugh.
"Well, you have a good sense of humour, right?" She asked as I nodded, smiling a bit.
"Great! Now, let's start with a simple story which I can assure you, have effected me as much as it effected the other patients" She laughed and I gave her a curious look.
"Should I prepare the tissues?" I joked, and she laughed again. Man, does she have a happy personality.
"Nope, this story needs to get located at the tissue factory" She joked back, and surprisingly, I laughed along.
***
hey. you probably hate me but whateva. i love you and nothing can change that. you'll get to know what lou is diagnosed for in the next chapters. and no im not sorry for killing 4/4 of his sisters. it's a part of the plot!
yo, im delilah btw 🌚
Until next time,
Dana x