{ Chapter dedicated to: @Larry4dayz }
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I don't know if it was the rustling winds or the white snow surrounding me that made me feel cold. It was like I haven't been living here for the past 18 years, going through the same freezing weather. I've just stared at my feet, looking quite curiously at the boots I am wearing. Another wind ran by me, making a shiver dive down my spine. But it certainly meant something; what was so wrong?
Tick tock, goes the clock.
Tick tock, it'll never stop.
It fucking ticks and fucking tock's
It's making me insane and won't go away
When would the tick ticking stop?
Maybe if I killed myself?
Fucking tick, fucking tock
Maybe then my heart will stop..
I felt it, that anonymous feeling, it's coming back. It's making me freeze, breaking my heart, bringing back tears of madness. I don't wanna feel this; please go away. But it only seemed to taunt me, as to I was tearing up completely. I squinted my eyes close, hoping to see him between some flashbacks, but the only thing that came back was that horrendous moment in that dream I had.
"Hush hush darling, don't you cry, I may have gone, but it's best to die. I know I promised, I haven't kept my word, but can you please forgive me, for I will leave this world. With a smile on my lips, and cuts on my hips. You were there all along, just don't forget our song. It's the day we met, I knew it was you, they told me to bet, on this someone new. They knew I'll fall in love, I told them they were wrong, and it was I who mistaken, just promise to stay strong.." He spoke ever so softly, the words leaving his ghostly lips were so foreign, as to I never witnessed such a beautiful poetry.
My heart fluttered, remembering his sincere words, but why did it left those lips? For, him, whom shall never leave such a world. I still am not in believe of his death, because his soul is the reason this world is full with smiles. Now that he've left, this universe have been marked with frowns. At least to me it is.
Bright colours are drained, dull colours are used. Smiles have faded, frowns have been painted on so many lips. Clear clouds turned grey, weather change and rainy days. Flowers have withered, and oxygen have been limited. Sun have lost its shine and this universe slipped into dullness itself. But what hurts the most, is that his soul is still around.
I still find myself looking at corners, picturing him standing there, smiling at me. But for them, he's gone. How can he when he's the one who brought all the light and all the happiness to this world? To me? He's not gone, I can still sense his soul. I can feel his smiles and feel his warmth. He's somewhere around, I just have to look for him.
"Louis?" I felt someone whisper behind me, making me slowly turn around. My mother stood there, her frown never faltered, her eyes were red from crying and she looked so tired. I nodded my head, tilting my head to face the sky. The weather quickly changed, a few rain drops falling on my shoulders.
"Why don't you come inside? It'll maybe heavily rain in a few minutes and I don't want you to get sick" She spoke, waiting for a reply. But I just stuffed my hands in my pockets and nodded, walking my way inside the house and into the living room.
"Switch on the telly. Maybe there's some good t.v shows or something. I'll be in the kitchen, doing cocoa's.." She spoke, and as if it wasn't obvious, all I did was nod again, making her sigh as she took her way into the kitchen. The delight to talk wasn't in my goods anymore. Every time I cry, I break. I tried it at least 20 times yesterday, but I seem to miserably fail. I switched on the t.v, looking for something to make me think for a moment, thinking about my thoughts. That's until I stumbled on the news, catching my eyes and full attention.
"Yesterday was a dreadful day for America, otherwise known to the crisis which occurred on Washington's University, students have lost their souls to another person's mistake. Who is that person, may you ask? Harry Styles, an 20 year old man whom have moved to university and the way from hometown, Holmes Chapel. Also known as a depressed person, with many severe depression illness. Harry came in hands to be getting revenge of some classmates whom have been teasing Harry's funny attitude. But he never knew that murdering isn't the right choice to get even. This was a long morning to all of Washington's University students as to yesterday's some thought of mourning those innocent souls. From international news live from Washington's University campus, this is Lea Michelle" and it went of to commercials. I felt my body go numb, I felt my eyes getting watery, I felt my heart pounding out of my chest, as I felt my legs shaking. This is all bullshit. Harry would never murder innocent people. Heck, he wouldn't murder animals for staters. They're wrong, I know my Harry, he won't do such a horrible thing. He's Harry, that alone marks the obviousness. If they're feeding people with bullshit, then might as well I do the same.
"Louis? I'm going to Anne's for a bit, would you like to come?" My mother's voice snapped me out of my trance as I stared at my hands. I nodded, quickly slipping on my TOM's and walked out of the house with my mom. Paparazzi, photographers, interviewers and many more filled up in front of Anne's house.
"Ms. Styles, answer a few questions!"
"Ms. Styles, what was your reaction when you found out your son was a murder?"
"Ms. Styles, are you ashamed to show your face because of your son's disgrace?"
"Ms. Styles! How does it feel to have your only son as a killer?"
I was pissed, no, I was beyond that. I was so mad, I didn't have time to react in a better way before shoving them off, making space for us to go inside.
"Hey! Who do you think you are, kid!?"
"His boyfriend, now leave before I kick your asses!" I growled, not thinking twice as I started pushing some away, as my mom entered the house, myself right beside her.
"Oh! You're the boyfriend of the psychotic depressed killer? How sad"
Gasps were heard as I turned around. It only took that, only that it took for me to turn around, come face to face with the man who've said those words, punch that smirk off his face and shout out everything I've held inside.
"Listen here, you ass." I hissed, not controlling my over-flowed anger anymore. I pulled him by the collar, making him gulp loudly.
"He maybe gone, but not for so long. So why don't you shut that little lips of yours, or else, God help me I will break a few bones and bust your nose. You people are sick. So sick, I pity you. You're job is to snoop on people's lives, annoy the fuck out of them, and make them go through hell. It's pathetic. No, you're pathetic. So why don't you get your ass out of here before I destroy you and make you suffer? Now fuck off" I growled, letting go of his collar as I walked away, ignoring the gasps and gags as I was about to enter the house once again.
"Is that all you got, you wanker! That bitch of a boyfriend is dead, face the facts" I heard again, and I swear to God, he asked for it.
"You fucking cunt, haven't you heard what I said?" I growled, punching his jaw, making him stumble and fall onto the ground. I was furious, no one can stop me. I threw a few punches, repeatedly on his jaw, making his already busted nose and lips bleed, that was before I was pulled off and was pulled inside the house.
"Are you insane!? You could've killed him!" My mom yelled at me, her eyes held all the fear as tears rolled down her cheeks.
"Do I look like I care?" I answer, flatly. Sirens were bursting through the walls, making me fall to my knees as I let the tears of anger flow down, pulling my legs to my chest and curling into a ball.
"Is it true? What they said?" I ask, looking at my mom and Robin. Robin just stayed silent, unsure to wether talk or not. I felt a body next to me, arms around me, pulling me to them as I rested my head on her chest, sobbing harshly.
"No, Lou. Nor will it ever be. You know why?" She asks softly, stroking my hair. I couldn't talk, so I shrugged in her arms.
"Well, that's because he's an angel. And what have I told you about angels?" She asks, her eyebrows knotted together, a small smile on her lips.
"They're perfect. They're kind. And they'll go to heaven" I answer, in a rather whisper as I felt her smile widen.
"Correct. Now would Harry want to see you like this? Smile a bit" She encouraged me, but I was in no mood. She sighed and continued comforting me, drawing circles on my back.
"Do you think he have murdered those innocent people?" I ask, not daring to look in her eyes.
"Do you think he did?" And with that, I don't even hesitate to shake my head as a no, making her smile.
"Good, because I don't think so too" She answered, her arms still around me as I felt calmer than before.
"Now tell me anyway, how can an angel be a murder?"
***
wow. looks like im going to be crying almost on every chapter then. may I rest in peace.
Just so you won't get mixed up, Harry is older than Louis, 2 years different. And Louis planned to go to the same uni. Too bad that'll not happen omg I feel so mean gosh.
Oh and the first chapter was in Harry's P.O.V, it was reality. It happened and I left with a cliffhanger lol. The second chapter, Lou dreamed about it. And it became real. Makes sense now, eh?
AND OMG YOU'S GUYS IM CRYING YOURE COMMENTS ARE LIFE AND IM SO HAPPY YOU'RE LOVING THIS HONESTLY I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE SUCH A FAILURE BUT NO SO THANKS TO ALL AND EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU, ily and you make me cry omg xx 💜
Until next time,
Dana x