The eye of the goat, glazed, pupil horizontal and rectangle. It stared right into Sigyn's eye where it stood chained to the altar. A large slab of stone carved with ritual runes. Brasiers are lit with fires that spit embers into the sky all around the courtyard. The sound of drums rang out into the night - dead silent. Priests painted with white and black markings all over their heads, stood around the alter each with bowls in their hands, mumbling things under their breath. The head priest stood in front of the alter holding a large ornamental dagger in his hand to the sky, praising the Nornir and Ymir.
He shouted to the night sky where coloured lights flowed in the air like the ocean. Bright greens and blues, like giant mountains in the sky painted with colour. Sigyn stood just behind the priest with Thor at her side and both families and noblemen and women gathered in the courtyard. No one dared make a sound.
Even Forseti stood with his mother and father looking on with intense interest.
The goat was unblinking as it stared into Sigyn's eye, but it did not feel like it was pleading for its life. It knew what was about to happen and accepted it. A strange creature. She stared back at it with the same intensity.
"We honour the sacred union of tonight!" the priest proclaimed. "With this sacrifice, as I draw this blade across its throat, let it be known to Odin - our protector." The priest pressed the blade to the goats throat. "To Iwaldi, our ally. To the Vanir and Aesir as they are joined closer!" The blade is slowly dragged across its throat, and blood pours out deep crimson and black.
The other priests came forward each filling up their bowls with blood. Sigyn watched. They didn't care if it spilled all over the alter, or splashed onto the ground and their feet, or soaked their robes. Little by little, the goat sank to its knees until it toppled over drained of life.
"Let this sacrifice saturate us." the priest rounded the alter with a bowl of blood. "Let this sacrifice bring closer what is Aesir and Vanir; god and goddess, man and woman." he dipped his fingers into the blood. "This is a physical sign of two realms joined." The priest put two fingers to Thor's mouth and dragged the blood down in two stripes to his chin. He does the same to Sigyn.
His fingers dipped into the blood and he raised two fingers to her mouth. His fingers pressed into her skin, warm and thick, the blood was dragged over her lips tainting her senses with iron and metallic as it was brought down to her chin in two stripes. "This blood will go to the fields, and this body will go to the feast, its skin will be a pellet, it skull and horns an ornament."
The rhythmic beat of drums picked up and Odin walked forward from the crowd. Sigyn and Thor looked at each other, both turning to face the masses. Odin stopped, adorned with his ceremonial helmet and Gungnir. "Before Yggdrasil, It is done!"
The drums turned into celebrational beats and cheerful boasts rang into the night. The true celebration begun. They were flooded by people, all of them shouting some praise and congrats as they were guided into the palace where the crowd of people would be heading to the feasting hall to drink and eat the night. Sigyn smiled and waved and thanked people she didn't even know.
She was arm in arm with Thor who seemed more than happy to be engaged to the silver princess and she put on the same act. Her eyes locked with Loki as they passed, and he nodded to them. His way of saying congratulations. It was just the engagement; not the wedding. Sigyn had to remind herself. But her cruel thoughts kept telling her the wedding is what she has to endure next.
They danced and laughed their way into the hall where they shared a mug of ale and Sigyn cringed at how strong it was - and she laughed with Thor who then offered to drink the rest.
Musicians banged on drums, and flutes, and strings, and sang from their throats all night. Warriors drank their fill and the woman danced until they couldn't. "Another!" someone shouted somewhere, the sound of crashing following. Then it was Thor and Baldur standing on their seats over the heads of everyone, singing together.
(My mother told me, one day I would buy.)
Anybody who was anyone inside the feasting hall sang along to the words until it was a rhythmic chant through the crowd. All her sisters drank and danced, and Baldur had even rallied a group of warriors around him. Sigyn sang too.
(Galleys with good oars. Sails to distant shores.)
Thor was right, tonight was nothing like the first feast to welcome the Vanir. It was larger in every way. More people, food, and the decorations where like none she has seen. The celebration even seemed to carry on into the streets of Asgard where the people took the opportunity to party.
(Stand up on the prow. Noble barque I steer.)
Thor and Sigyn ended up dancing together in the crowd. They laughed with each other, exchanged a story, or a cup of mead.
(Steady) Steady course to the haven. Hew many foe-men. Hew many foe-men.)
Thor would pull Sigyn away to introduce her to his friends she hadn't met the first time or to meet a regular person. A blacksmith, or a book maker, who somehow had Thor's favour. She was introduced to all his hunting friends too. She was doing as her father commanded. Mingle with the common folk, gain their favour and you will be loved. Mingle with your betrothed and stay away from Loki.
She had not seen or spoken to Loki all day.
(My father told me. Someday I will die. Fighting for new lands. With blood covered hands. Let out my war cry. Show I have no fear. Valhalla's door to haven. Will wait for no man.)
The song ended in cheer. Another banquet of celebration was lost to the drink. There was a sudden distasteful sound of a string popping from an instrument and the music stopped. Laughter burst around the hall and the musician the lute was wondering how that happened. Thor even laughed, slapping the table a few times rattling the golden dishes.
The Vanir however, did not laugh.
If something like that happened in Vanaheim it would be seen as an embarrassment and disgrace. Sigyn looked around the hall. Not her father, mother, or brother laughed. Not even Baldur laughed. She turned her head away when another string popped. People laughed harder, most too drunk to know what at. They laughed hysterically.
Sigyn saw the twins. They weren't laughing. They gave Sigyn a look. Sigyn smiled and chuckled lightly. Her sisters followed cue, laughing lightly. The instrument was replaced and the music began again. Sigyn looked around. Her eyes spotted Loki hiding behind a pillar with a smug smile and he slipped away unseen.
Of course.
"Pardon me." she said to no one in particular. She left Thor's side and followed the path through the crowd. She dodged people who tried to congratulate her when she got caught up.
"Princess, behold your eyes!" a man of dark skin with a silky robe held out a strange creature in his hand. She stopped surprised. It looked like a small lizard with bug like eyes and spikes from his spine.
"Oh!" she smiled. "How lovely." She has no idea what kind of exotic creature it was. "What is it?"
"Jormungandr!" he laughed. The people around him laughed too. Sigyn pushed for a smile and laughed too. (Another son of Loki.) she thought.
"A rare species only found in Midgard. They are feisty creatures." the lizard snapped at Sigyn and she jumped back. The man laughed. He told her to hold out her hand.
"Is it going to bite me?"
"No." he laughed.
She might as well indulge. Sigyn put out her hand and the lizard was placed into her palm. Its claws tickled the surface of her skin and she smiled. Its tongue flew out and stuck to its eye. Her smile dropped. Its tongue slipped back into its mouth. She looked at the man bewildered and he laughs at her face. There was a presence behind her and the man stopped laughing.
He bowed his head, "Prince Loki." he polity greeted.
Sigyn's heart dropped into her stomach and she turned. Loki stood over her shoulder, eyes locked on the lizard. "Is he tormenting you, Princess Sigyn?"
She shook her head. "No, not at all."
"That is a lizard from Midgard." said Loki. "How did you come by it?"
"I export all things exotic from other realms." explained the man. "Now, I can finally do the same on Vanaheim. My mission is to educate young people on all things strange from the Nine Realms."
"Unfortunately, you'll be educating them on four realms. The others are inaccessible or barren waste lands left by my father and his before." said Loki, bluntly.
"Uh, yes, but I can go off the history books."
Loki smiled. "In that case. Princess, you look beautiful tonight." he bid farewell and stepped around her. She quickly gave the lizard back and chased after him following the path he took between people to make another great escape.
"Wait!" she called out.
Loki stopped and turned. "What?" he snapped.
Sigyn stopped. "Oh well, I haven't seen you all day yesterday or today." she said with a small voice.
He shrugged. "That is because we were told to stay away from each other after arguing that there is nothing between us despite the fact we are now one step closer to being family and unfortunately for you, you not only have to put up with my brother, but me for eternity."
He was different tonight. He was not the Loki full of fun or with a thousand things to talk about. He wasn't the same Loki who took her to meet Sleipnir. She suspected she knew the reason why.
Sigyn seemed taken back. "Why are you saying these things. I don't think that way about you or Thor. My mother and father just don't trust you because..."
"Why? Because I am the trickster god?" he seethed. His eyes looked behind her and he straightened up.
Sigyn looked behind herself, her brother was watching them.
"I don't see it that way." she said to him. "I thought we had a good friendship and now I know you are not who I defended against my father yesterday. I am expected to carry out this alliance and that is what I am doing. In the meantime, I hoped to love my husband and his family. Turns out my father was right. I hope you enjoy the feast, Prince Loki."
She turned back into the crowd and she disappeared among the people. Loki let out a breath. He knew he hurt her feelings and he can't bear it. He was hoping to leave unnoticed and let her enjoy her engagement until she chased him. How stupid was he for going up to her. This was his fault. He ruined her night, and now he felt he couldn't leave, not with Sigvard looking right at him across the way with a smug smile.
Loki turned away quickly. Disappearing from his sight when he walked right into his brother. Damn.
"Brother!" rejoiced Thor, eyes blown wide, mead in hand. "Finally, I have caught you - you are like a worm slipping thorough my fingers." he mimicked a hand motion, red checked. "What are you doing?"
"Just about to get a drink, brother."
Thor shoved his mead into Loki's chest. "Have mine." It spilled over the top and Loki quickly grabbed it before Thor let it go. "Being engaged feels weird."
"You are drunk, Thor." Loki took a massive gulp from the mead. "More than the first feast, I hope you don't do this on the wedding."
"Good. I don't want to know what it actually feels like."
Loki sighed. "It cant be that bad, you are not actually married yet. This is your engagement to a beautiful Princess, have you lot your mind, brother? You must keep your wits about you. We have the Vanir to impress or did you forget father's words?"
Thor grabbed the front of Loki's ceremonial armour and he pointed a finger at him. "Then you marry her. I don't want to be married, brother. I want to be free. I want to fight!" he roared, and those around him cheered too.
"I see the way you both look at each other and it makes me sad because I know I'll never get that from Sigyn."
Loki chuckled. "I don't know what you're talking about, brother, you're too drunk."
"Do I have to bed her tonight?" whispered Thor.
"No. That's the wedding night."
Thor patted his brother on the shoulder a few times. "Good, good." he nodded. "Good. Brother, I want you to do something. You have to stop this wedding."
"I can't do that, Thor. You know that. I won't ruin this for you, this time. I understand what is at stake." Loki doesn't know why he bothers. Thor won't remember by the morning. But he had to speak his heart.
"I love you, Loki."
"Why can't you say the same for Sigyn?"
"What?" Thor slurred.
"Nothing." Loki guided his brother to a chair where they both sat at the long table. He looks over his shoulder. Sigvard is nowhere in sight. For the moment.
"It may be luck, but it doesn't feel like it." Thor slumped his words together. "You love her, since the moment you laid eyes on her, don't you?"
"That's enough of that, brother." Loki kept looking around as Thor mumbled things that didn't make sense. He raved on about loving Sigyn and the wedding and how lucky he is. Thor grabbed Loki's front again.
"Do you desire the Princess?"
"No."
"A shame!" he pushed Loki away, reaching for another mug of ale. Loki snatched it away and Thor looked as if he was about to bring thunder on his brother's head. "This is my engagement!" he scolded. "I'll drink as much as I want." he snatched the mug from his brother and down what was left. Loki sighed. He wished he could get as drunk as his brother.
"You are making a fool of yourself - why do I bother?"
What's to stop him from drowning his sorrows?
As the night got late and the partying got harder, both Prince's of Asgard where on the table, pretending to sword fight with small bones they chewed free of its meat. People laughed and encouraged them to fight. They shouted insult and charged at each other. No matter what he did, Loki couldn't get the attention of the Princess. Drunk herself, and hidden away in a crowd of girls, they weren't interested in the affairs of the men at the long table.
Nanna had taken Forseti to bed a long time ago leaving Baldur to cheer at the long table. Then Thor and Loki were given real swords. The sound of metal clashed and the cheering got louder - enough to get the attention of the girls. Sigyn looked over and her eyebrows came together. She asked a girl next to her, what were they doing?
"Fighting?" she replied.
"Why?"
"They are brothers. Its what they do."
Sigyn looked away, continuing her conversation with the women and Queen Frigga who told Sigyn to pay them no mind. It wasn't until their drunken stupor that Thor and Loki fell off the table and into the laughing crowd. Both red cheeked and laughing, and in their minds, having fun. Unknowingly making themselves an embarrassment to Iwaldi and Freya.
But this was the partying life of Asgard.
Loki was back on the table and shouting. "In honour of my brother and Sigyn!" That seemed to get her attention. "May we proser in their name!" he shouted and the hall erupted into cheer. "For Asgard!" there was a chorus of response.
"For Asgard!"
"For Vanaheim!"
"For Vanaheim!"
Sigyn tore her eyes away from Loki on the table. When she looked back he was jumping back into the crowd and her eyes dropped away. She can't help it. Her eyes followed the dark prince as he left the hall arm in arm with Thor. She quickly excused herself from Queen Frigga.
Thor stumbled along side his brother, half asleep and mumbling incoherent things. "Bruthor!" slurred Thor. "You fight like a true Drengr! You eat and drink like one too... I have taught you well, bruthor."
Loki laughed, telling him it was time for bed. He had never seen his brother drink himself into a sleep on the first night. He must really not want to be married. It was sad. He felt sad for his brother and for Sigyn.
Princess Sigyn stepped out into the corridor where people were mingling away from the main party. She looked all around and up and down for the Prince's of Asgard. How could they have gotten away so quickly?
She ventured out, finally feeling the cool night air untainted by the feast inside the hall and the drunken thoughts seemed to settle with the breeze. Sigyn smiled and nodded to people who she passed, her eyes still searching for Thor and Loki. They must have gone to bed for the night.
Sigyn took the path she knew back up to the top levels of the palace. Her sandals are soundless as a cats footfall as she stalked the golden halls of Asgard. She came to a crossroads, numb to the location of Thor's chambers. Then she heard a voice.
"Fight me, drengr!" the thunder of Thor's voice came from somewhere to the left. Then a softer voice that made her heart pump, spoke in reply. It was too soft to be heard. Sigyn followed them anyway.
"You have made me... hicc... proud on this night, brother."
"I hope you'll have your head screwed on straight by the morn."
Thor laughed. "By Odin's beard, I have never ever seen you party and drink like you have on this special night. You have surely made mother and father proud!" he said, happily, and proud. "For you have made me proud, so much it fills me with a happy feeling."
"I hope so."
Sigyn followed the trail of voices to a large set of doors. She stopped just before the open door woven with Celtic knots and patterns. She fiddled with her fingers looking at the golden polished floor, too embarrassed to intrude on the brothers.
"It was a good night!" rejoiced Thor. "I am gladdened to be betrothed to Sigyn. She is wonderful and beautiful and perfect in every way, don't you agree?"
She raised her head.
Loki chuckled. "I agree, brother. I also agree you must rest now."
Thor scoffed at that. "Ah, I could party on for weeks." Loki mumbled in reply. "Loki," pleaded Thor. "There is no one I could trust better than you. I want to earn the favour of Iwaldi and Freya."
"Trust me. You have it. They don't favour me." There was the sound of movement, like Loki was getting ready to leave. Sigyn's heart jumped into her throat. "I bid you farewell for the night and I will see you in the morn."
Sigyn decided to step in before she was caught eavesdropping. She appeared in the doorway and Loki froze at the foot of Thor's bed. His eyes grew wide and he turned to Thor, already asleep in his bed and snoring. A small laugh tried to claw its way from her mouth.
"Lady Sigyn." Loki cleared his throat. "What are you doing here?"
She came into the room and Loki stepped back like she was carrying a disease. "I wanted to make sure he was alright." she lied.
Loki looked at his brother like he would wake up and help him. "He's fine now. Just drunken into stupor." he replied, chocking on his tongue. She was so radiant and beautiful tonight. He loved the image of her in firelight. Loki scratched just above his thin eyebrow. "If you will excuse me, I'll retire for the night too and I'll leave you with my brother."
He went to walk around her when she turned, asking him to stop for a moment. He obeyed. He couldn't help it. If she asked him to kill, he would. If the princess asked anything of him, he would do it in a heartbeat for her. By the Norns, what is he feeling? It was so strong in his chest and stomach and in the back of his mind.
"Yes, Princess?" he asked.
She licked her lips, nervously. He looked away from them. "I'm not sure anymore, I lost my train of thought."
Loki nodded. He sucked in a breath of encouragement before, "I didn't get the chance to congratulate you tonight." he turned his back to the door, forgetting he ever wanted to leave so quickly.
"Oh, thank you." she sounded disappointed.
Loki didn't know what to do with his hands, so he picked at his palm. A loud snore rippled through Thor. Sigyn pushed for a smile, looking at Thor. She tried to search for the love when she looked at him, but it never existed in the space between them. "Does something trouble you?" asked Loki, cautiously.
"Maybe I try too hard to love him, but I just can't." she confessed, her voice small and fragile.
Loki looked up at her.
"Since I have come here, those feelings..." she stopped herself.
Loki took a curious step forward. "Yes?" he urged her to finish.
She waved him off. "Nothing, it sounds foolish." she kept her eyes on Thor sleeping and snoring. Finally, Loki made it to her side on silent footfalls and her blue eyes finally turned to look at him for a change. They never looked through him, only at him, like he was real and he mattered to her.
"Nothing you say will ever sound foolish to me, Princess." he took her hand in his. The same hand he touched the first moment they met, the same hand he kissed, and he ran a gentle thumb over her hand. "I have always felt as though a link exists between our hearts." he spoke softly to her. "And if that were to break, then I would cease to live."
"Loki..." Sigyn breathed out, nervous. "What are you saying?" she wished to the Norns he wasn't about to do what she knows he is about to do.
He turned his whole body to face her. "Sigyn, from the moment I laid my eyes on you I have loved you so deeply not ginnungagap could compare - and before you say it, I know I shouldn't. I have been reminded day in and out you are betrothed to Thor and it kills me on the inside because I wish it was me instead. You don't look at me like I am an evil trickster. You look at me as though I am normal."
Sigyn's mouth opened and close, unable to spit the words she wanted to say.
"I didn't mean the words I said earlier, I never wanted to ruin tonight."
"You haven't." she placed her other hand over his. His green eyes lifted again and they blew wide. "Is what you say true, Loki?"
"From the deepest parts of my heart, it has started beating again. Sigyn, you breath life into me. There is not a waking moment I don't think about you..." Then he stopped with a sigh. "It's wrong, I know. I could be prosecuted just for saying these things and - and I will understand if you don't share the same feelings, which I myself have only just come to understand."
Sigyn shook her head, a bright smile on her pink lips. "Loki, stop." she said, firmly. And he closed his mouth looking at her intently with fire burning in his eyes. His heart is beating in his ears and he was so scared the princess was going to reject him flat out. He couldn't stop his mouth before the words were said, and it was already too late to take them back.
He blinked. "Your answer?" he asked, afraid.
Their lips were suddenly met. Soft and warm. Their bodies pressed so closely. Loki fell into Sigyn's embrace. His long arm snaking around to the back of her hair, lacing through soft waves of silver hair. The feeling in the git of their stomachs enhanced ten fold and blood rushed to Sigyn's cheeks. White took over their minds and nothing mattered, not the alliance, not the wedding. Just each other in the moment. It was all they cared about all they wanted all along; Sigyn realised that now.
A rumbling snore from Thor broke them apart at last. They stayed close for a moment both dazed by what happened. By the Norns it was so wrong, but it felt so good to Loki. They had no words to say, so they stayed like this.
That was her answer.
"I'm sorry, Loki." Sigyn finally broke the silence that was killing her. "It's wrong. We can't do this."
He nodded. Eyes struggling to flutter open. "I know. I'm sorry." was all he had to say. "I promised Thor I wouldn't ruin this for him and I just did."
"I did too, you are not to blame. But it cannot happen again." she whispered, her voice cracking. She looked down to hide the tears. "It would send our realms back into turmoil and I fear what my father will do to you if he found out."
"I am not afraid of either of them." He cupped her chin and lifted her head. "Odin or Iwaldi. I would kneel before the Norns themselves and announce my love for you to the world." His large hands cupped her shoulders, firm but gentle. "I would tell them right now."
Sigyn smiled brightly up at him. "Thank you, Loki." she looked sad. "I wish it was different. I really do." she took his large hand away. "But it is not meant to be. Only if you could take the string of fate and change them." she laughed, fighting back the tears.
"What if I could?" he said. "There are stories about a passageway on Midgard to the Norns. I, the trickster god, Loki, I can do anything. Even if it meant demanding the Nornir..."
"It's not possible, Loki, I am truely sorry. For both of us. You must understand."
His hands dropped to his side. "I do understand, but only for you, I would rip the branches from Yggdrasil and lay them at your feet. I would set the World Tree on fire, you only need ask."
She stepped back. "I cannot ask that of you." her voice cracked again. Her throat swelled tight and her lungs felt like they were submerged. "No one can know about this." she took in a breath, puffing out her chest and she said. "Good night, Loki." Her voice barely a whisper, and she turned to leave. Their joined hands slipped apart.
Loki bit his lip so hard he tasted blood. Still he let Sigyn go.
From the shadows in the corridor by the open door, a figure quickly whisked away.