John's P. O. V
I stood there in shock. I really didn't know what to do. I felt my throat knotting and my stomach felt heavy. I turned around and stared walking fast among the group of sweaty people.
Once I made it to a blank spot, I grabbed my hair, pulling it back, trying to recompose. I take my phone out and decide to text Lafayette.
To: Favoritefrenchgay
Yo, I left the party, not feelin well. Tell Alex I'll let the dorm key under the carpet.
I bursted of of the house and the cold wind hit my face. I really didn't care. Nothing could get any colder than my mind right now.
It was stupid to believe that he actually wantede to come just to have fun with me. I'm stupid. My life is a fucking joke and it's stupid.
I walk to my dorm, kicking some pebbles on the way. The only thing that could be heard was my slow stepping and the bouncing of the little rocks against the pavement.
When I made it to my dorm building I checked the time. It was almost midnight and I didn't realize that I was very tired until my bed got into my sight field.
I took off the stupid costume and stayed in my underwear, throwing myself over my back on the bed. I heard a notification sound and took my phone.
From: Favoritefrenchgay
Hercules says "not feeling well" It's an excuse to leave, Mon Ami
From: Favoritefrenchgay
I believe you, though.
And I will tell pettit Alex for sure.
I sigh and text a simple 'thanks'. I can't stand this. Why does my life should be this miserable? I mean, I know I'm not the most attractive. Or the smarter, and maybe I have a lot of issue with myself. But I'm a great guy! I'm not as great as Eliza Schuyler apparently, but I gotta live with that.
I gotta live with the fact that no one is ever gonna love me for who I am. Not even someone as kind-hearted as Alex.
You gotta get over him, Laurens.
I probably should. Without even realizing, I let the tears roll down, making their way to my ears. I never liked crying over things. I've cried enough the las 20 years of my life, for worst things.
This is butterscotch taste in front of the bitter life I used to have back at my hometown.
My eyes start closing at the reminder of my past. Suddenly I feel really tired and I yawn unintentionally. Rolling over, I take a blanket and throw it over my half naked body, finally falling asleep.
*****
I shot my eyes open when I hear a strong thud followed by a small giggle. I get of of the bed, finding a giggling Alex laying on the floor.
"Hi Jacky!" He waved from the floor. By the way he was babbling his words, it was obvious that he was extremely drunk.
"Alex? Why are you on the floor? Who took you here?" I kneeled beside him, trying to stand him up, which failed so I just managed to sit him down with his back again the bed.
"Uh, Laf 'n Hurc took me here?" He dragged slowly, sounding more like a question. "I dunno, my feet felt funny and suddenly I was giving a bear hug to the floor... " He pouted, furrowing his eyebrows.
I tried my best no to smiled at his cuteness. I shook my head, taking his hair out of his face.
"Alex, it's almost 4 am, why are you here so late?" I really didn't know why I kept asking him things, he's drunk for God's sake!
"I missed you at the party, Jacky. " He looked at me intensely. "Where'd you go?" His voice was cracking.
"I didn't feel well, Alex." I simply said.
He frowned, then his hands held mine. "Are you sick, Jacky? Are you gonna leave me like my mom did? Are you gonna die from sickness?" His voice became anxious and now there was actual tears forming in his eyes.
"What? No! Alex, I'm not sick, I just wasn't feeling comfortable. " I shook my head, hugging him. "I'm not leaving. "
God, I'm so pathetic. Why can't I just be mad?
"Alex, let's get you to your bed, you need to rest. " I tried to get up, but he held at me even more tightly.
"No! Stay!" He whined. I sighed.
"Why am I so weak before your words?" I muttered to myself. He started humming some melody, complete ignoring my growing frustration. His head was pressed against my bare chest, warming the area.
"Jacky? "
"Mhm? " I looked down at him.
"You smell good. " He stated, pecking my chest.
My breathing got stuck and my heart raced, he probably noticed that.
"Thanks." I breathed out.
"Eliza didn't smell good. " He said giggling. "He smells like flowers and vanilla, I don't like that smell." He shook his head like a little child.
"B-but you kissed her. " I said, a pain in my guts as I remembered.
"No." He frowned. "She kissed me. I told her I didn't like her that way and she laughed. Why did she laughed? When I asked her she told me that her plan worked. I don't know what the fuck that meant. " Alex giggled.
Now everything had sense. That Charles guy mysteriously asking me to go to the kitchen. It was all planned, but for what? To hurt my feelings?
"Did she told you something else?" I asked carefully.
"I don't rememba'" Alex yawned. "Don't interrupt me, I was saying that you smelled good. " He moved his finger across my chest, still leaning over it. "You smell like wood and ocean scent shampoo. Sometimes you have a touch of eucalyptus. It just smells so good. " He inhaled my skin, sighing.
"Alex, I really think we should take you to sleep. " I cleared my throat.
"I want to sleep with you. " He hugged my waist, snuggling on my lap. Oh my God. "In every sense of the statement." He giggled.
Oh god.
"Alex, I -"
"I love you, Jacky. "
I kept silence for a few moments, trying to wrap my head around his words.
He looked up at me, smiling. His cheeks were rosy, his pupils we're dilated. "You're too precious. " He pecked my lips and went back to snuggle.
I was shocked. My face felt hot and my spine got shivers.
"Alexand-" I was interrupted by a slight snoring. He had fallen asleep.
I sighed.
Tomorrow was going to be a hard day.
**************
New cover, yay!
This is some make up shot for the late angst. XD
Remember that you're lovely <3
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