I rode next to Saizo, just far enough back to not be accused of staring, but out of his direct line of sight. The shifting landscape went from farmland looking baked and arid, to greener woodland, and I sensed we were gaining altitude as the distance cantered by. Occasionally we would let the horses walk or jog, but he appeared to have a set agenda.
We rode straight through two villages, a swirl of dust the only memory of our passing, and as the sun moved lower and began to colour the sky, he turned onto a smaller trail and we slowed to allow the horses to pick their way uphill.
I wasn't prepared for how high up we were until the path curved around the slope and I saw a small cluster of buildings clinging to several rocky outcrops. The drop was sheer with only a lone tree here and there clinging to the surface. Below, way below, pine trees gave way to fields. Around the buildings colourful pennants billowed in the updraft from the valley and it felt a spiritual sort of place.
As we neared the first building, a slender young woman stood quietly on the verandah watching us. Saizo simply nodded to her and she bowed and went back inside as we passed. The path twisted around the buildings, I counted five in all, they all looked like copies of one another, clustered around one that stood higher than the rest. The horse's hooves rang out on the rocky surface and I gathered we were heading for the highest building, the last in the group.
Another woman, older than the first, stood on the verandah, although this one looked impatient, as if we had disturbed her with our arrival. I almost jumped out of my skin as I went to dismount, a young girl was already holding Jin's bridle. Saizo chuckled from the other side of his horse, I hadn't heard a thing, she simply appeared - not more flippin' ninjas.
"Welcome Lady Tamara." The woman spoke in a crisp tone from the verandah. Saizo stopped for a second, realizing how much distance there was to my understanding range. He looked back at me and narrowed his eyes, whilst I avoided his entirely and looked where I was going up the tiny path.
"You're late." She said tersely to Saizo as we entered the building. He only sighed and shrugged in reply, and I was left at a total loss as to what was going on. All I knew for certain was that I was dusty, hungry and tired.
In the next moment a large basin of water appeared in front of me, held by another young girl.
"You must feel dusty, hungry and tired." The woman said, repeating the exact words from my head. I was stunned motionless, but the smile the woman gave me was so warm, I felt myself relax again quickly and gratefully accepted the cloths being offered.
This place was weird.
Not spooky weird, just, well, weird.
I made a mental note I should be careful what I was thinking.
With her back to me the woman said, "Yes, you should."
Okay, so now it was spooky and weird.
Both her and Saizo chuckled and I thought it best just to deal with the dust.
The wonderful aroma of food lit my senses as I turned back from rinsing my face and hands. It seemed to have spontaneously manifested itself directly out of the silence. My eye caught the movement of a door closing, and I was reassured it wasn't magic, but still, I hadn't heard a footstep.
Saizo was already eating as I crossed the room, I was trying to step lightly, but sounded like a herd of elephants on the boards. The woman smiled kindly again and I felt at peace instantly.
"Please, Lady Tamara, eat well, you have had a long day." Despite the sentence I felt the food almost reach out to me, I was in fact, starving. The cool drink that accompanied the meal was like a citrus tea, it was instantly refreshing and my cup was refilled swiftly.
"Now you must be tired." The woman said softly as a wave of exhaustion seemed to be in the wake of her words. "Kizen will show you to a place where you can rest."
I visibly jumped as another young woman had appeared next to me.
Damn this ninja stuff, it still freaks me out how they do that, that thing. I shot Saizo what I'm sure was a confused look, but his usual impassive face just gave a slight flick of his head that I should go. Kizen had to help me to my feet, I had seized up from sitting.
"Rest well Lady Tamara."
The woman's voice washed over me again as I left. I was in a daze as Kizen gently freed me from the chest piece and wrist cuffs, offering me a beautiful crisp white robe. She quietly sponged off and dressed the thin cut from Saizo's blade along with two others I had no idea I had. My shoulder and leg were turning dark from bruises where Jin and I had been rammed to the ground, and my body felt heavier and heavier.
I wondered idly if there had been something in the tea.
I was soon cocooned in bedding, and the last thing my ears registered was what sounded like a terse exchange the other side of the wall:
"You should have been here ages ago."
"Couldn't be helped."
"Really Saizo? You've made this far more difficult than it needed to be, it was never meant to go on this long."
"I'm here now aren't I? I... I realised (his voice dropped too low for me to hear what he was saying)
"You better hope it's not too late, how soon can you be back?"
"Late morning"
"See that you are."
I think I heard hoof beats, but my eyes were so heavy and sleep so close I wasn't sure, and the warm bedding around me was so wonderful.
I sat up, sharp and alert and in total darkness.
I couldn't work out where I was.
For a second I thought I was back at that place, that cold horrible place, my heart was thumping in my chest and I even had to check my hands weren't tied together.
Then a familiar voice and soft orange orb bobbed across to where I was sitting, I couldn't seem to get my heart to slow down, and my breathing sounded loud in the quiet of the room.
An image of the buildings on the outcrop crossed my mind as she spoke:
"Do you remember where you are now?"
"Yes, yes, thank you." I paused "I'm sorry, but do you have a name?"
"I have many names, but if it helps you may call me Shai."
"Thank you." Somehow a name seemed to make a better connection to this woman in the dark.
I felt her settle on the bedding, and could just see a hint of her from the glow. I thought about the time when we first met and the pendant.
"There are five of them." She said. I blinked in the dark, then made the connection.
"If one shatters or is destroyed, another will appear. There are always five across realities."
"Say what now?" My mind was doing origami.
She softly laughed in the dark, bemused by my total lack of understanding at something she must have thought so simple.
"So this is real?" My eyes widened at her. She sighed before continuing.
"In a manner of speaking, you feel pain, you have bruises, yes? You feel this?" She pinched my hand - hard.
"Ow!" I drew it back sharply from her and clutched it to my chest.
"It's more your understanding of realities that is the problem, unfortunately we don't have the time to discuss it in detail.
To be honest, I was already struggling with the small amount of information Shai had given. In the gloom she lifted another pendant, its green and gold twisted and writhed, then settled to a dim green, barely illuminating her hand.
"I offer you a choice Tamara, pay attention. I will give you just this one chance to make a decision, there will be no going back from it."
My heart picked up its pace and a good part of me went cold. She held the pendant closer and I could feel my shoulder burn, as if the small pieces in my shoulder reacted to the one in front of my face. It felt like they had a keen dislike of being in each other's space.
"You can go, right now, back to your reality." I watched the swinging pendant. "But you will return in the state you are in, if you don't receive immediate medical attention either your heart or brain with rupture."
It was a tempting, but grisly thought.
"Or you can choose to stay, let us try to heal you and ..." She stopped mid sentence.
"And?"
"Seeing futures isn't really my thing Tamara."
But something in her tone told me she probably saw more than she was willing to share. Her next question startled me.
"Do you have a reason to stay?"
I shrank into my mind, wrestling against my feelings as they made a final stand, all of them screaming at me at once. I didn't want to admit it to myself, but despite everything, there was only one, one word, one name.
"Saizo."
I looked down into the bedding as I barely breathed his name.
"Well done!" She said brightly, and I was left feeling I'd passed some sort of test. I was getting confused again.
Without warning the knife like agony becoming familiar ran into my chest, I gasped as involuntary tears filled my eyes and I doubled up into the bedding. Deft fingers and incredibly strong arms brought me to an upright sitting position, the pain subsided and I breathed heavily in its echo.
"How many of these have you had?"
"Four, five, six maybe." I couldn't think straight as she began to fire questions at me, my mouth however seemed to reply immediately of its own accord.
"Headaches?' "No."
"Dizziness?" "Yes." (A flash of the formal feast)
"Anger?" "Yes." (My fight with Yukimura)
She ran her hand lightly down my arm -
"I think I'll take pushing yourself physically as a given."
My head was spinning until her next question threw water over it.
"Did anyone try to help you?"
Shingen.
I paused this time before answering.
"Yes, Lord Shingen."
"That'll be sex then." She said simply.
I put my hand up, feeling myself blushing all of a sudden.
"Whoa, just a minute there." Shai laughed softly, I got the impression she was shaking her head.
"Tamara, sex is a very powerful thing if you understand how to use it."
Now I felt like some little girl getting the sex talk from their mother.
"Did it help? Did you feel better?" My mouth answered before I could stop it.
"Yes, for a while."
"Well then. He's quite skilled I understand." She added unnecessarily. I groaned, I wasn't used to talking like this.
"You come from a strange place." Shai offered.
"That's what he said too." I heard myself say, before a stupid girly giggle followed it.
Shai again laughed softly at me, and my embarrassment.
An easy silence grew between us. I could feel myself relax, despite the dark around me.
"Lady Tamara?"
"Yes?" I searched for her face, and then those eyes of hers loomed into my vision.
"Sleep."
And I could feel myself falling back into it.